As far as I’m aware, I’ve never somnambulated. Lately, however, I frequently feel as if I am in something of a stupor. Even as I write this, I’m on the verge of sleep. My eyes are heavy, and I’m very, very tired. I’d probably be asleep in no time if I were to lie down and close my eyes. Lucky you, I’m putting my blog above the basic biological need for rest. I’m cool like that.
So, what’s the cause of my lethargy? Lack of sleep, plain and simple. For at least three weeks now, I’ve rarely gotten more than 6 hours of sleep at night. Often, I’m much closer to 5 hours. Last week, I went several days in a row where I was topping out at 5 hours of sleep. I’m actually rather impressed that I’ve managed so well. But these last couple of days, I’m feeling it. I sit down to watch something with Melanie, and I’m lucky to go 20 minutes without dozing off. Even sitting on the toilet, I begin to lose consciousness.
To be clear, I’m not trying to complain. I could—theoretically—go to bed earlier than I do. But it’s not like I’m being totally frivolous with my time. I’m not staying up until 1 or 2 a.m. to party. And I’m not getting up at 7 a.m. because it’s fun. There’s just a lot to do, and our kids’ sleep schedule has been messed up ever since we went to Utah in the summer. It’s rare that all of our children are asleep by 10 p.m. Often, putting the kids to bed can take until 10:30 or 11 p.m.! Whether I’m putting the kids to bed myself (which happens two or three times a week) or I’m doing school-related work while Melanie puts the kids to bed, I don’t have any substantial free time in my day until the kiddos are down. That’s just the way it works. By that time of day, I’m desperate to relax. I need to do something to unwind. The thought of going straight to bed is very unappealing. If all I did was work and sleep, I’d be miserable. And so, I usually end up kicking back (at 11 p.m. or later!) with a movie or some TV shows. But even if I spend only an hour in front of the tube, by the time I do all of the other get-ready-for-bed-and-for-the-next-day things, it’s easily 1 a.m. And down the spiral I go.
On the bright side, exhaustion may reach a point where I give up on downtime and even abandon my schoolwork because I simply can’t take it anymore. I assume sleep will become my number one priority soon enough, once my body is incapable of pressing forward without some serious zzz’s. Until then, I’lkk oeep pllugign awy….k,,,,,,////////