Saturday, March 05, 2005

Why Ask Why?

The world is full of baffling mysteries. Perhaps nowhere is this more true than in our own social practices and habits. May I now present to you, my faithful reader, a host of enigmatic quandaries that have left me scratching my head as of lately. Enjoy!

Inspired by recent trips to movie theaters:
  • Why is being in a movie theater an automatic license to litter? There is no logical basis to this. You don't (hopefully) go to fast food restaurants and just leave burger wrappers and empty fry boxes on the floor, so why do you do it at a movie theater? You think the employees of the theater honestly don't care, or that the garbage cans just outside the theater are there for decoration? Rudeness!
  • Why do people sit right next to you even when there are plenty of available seats elsewhere? Yeah, we've all had this bad experience, but it just keeps happening! How can people really be this ignorant?
  • Why do some guys feel it necessary to flush an unflushed urinal when they go to use it? I have often witnessed a man flushing a urinal just before he unzips his pants and relieves himself, but even if the urinal was unflushed by its previous user, what is the point of flushing it before you pee in it yourself? You don’t want to get your pee dirty or something? And unless you have an even bigger problem, it's not like the previous person's pee is going to splash all over you while you're urinating! It just seems pointless to me!
Inspired by the road:
  • Why is the "road narrows" sign constantly used to mean "merge"? When I was in driver's ed, they taught us that "road narrows" means the lanes get closer together, not that they become one. And, if you look at the actual "road narrows" sign (click here to see an unusual version of the sign which should refresh your memory), the picture is not of two lanes becoming one, but simply of a lane getting even closer to another lane. The problem is, the "road narrows" sign is used for both purposes, so you never really know what to expect! This is yet another example of how semi-exclusive knowledge can lead to very irritating pet peeves!
  • Why can't people tell the difference between crosswalks and stop signs? Sadly, there are lots of locations where crosswalks actually appear several feet after a stop sign. This means other drivers often believe the crosswalk to be a second stop line. This is not the case! So, either you get people driving in front of you who needlessly stop twice, or you get angry drivers who think you've ran a stop sign (this is a common problem at four-way stops, for example). If there are not pedestrians, a white line does not automatically mean you have to stop, people!
  • Why can't we pretty much always "left turn yield on green"? I know it makes sense on busy or visually obstructed roads not to allow a left-turner to always turn left on a green light, but it seems like there are so many times when it is unnecessary to just be sitting there when it's obvious you could be going. Annoying!
Miscellaneous:
  • Why are fast-food restaurants refusing to fill their beverages to capacity nowadays? In the last few months, it's become common to receive a drink at the drive-thru window that literally has two or three inches of cup left empty. It must be because they are trying to be quick and not waiting for the foam to settle, but this has become a recent phenomenon at several places. I honestly sent one back once and told them to please fill it. Am I super sizing for nothing here?!?
  • Why does Peter Gallagher keep getting acting jobs??? He's horrible!
  • Why do they have tip jars at sandwich shops (such as Subway)? Really, do you deserve special monetary recognition just because you do more than grab a wrapped burger from underneath a heat lamp and put it in a bag? Coffee shops, haircuts, etc., all expecting a tip! These people (as far as I know) aren't making $2.00 an hour like the waitress at Village Inn. It seems ridiculous!
  • Why isn't it illegal to leave advertisements (e.g., flyers) on cars and doorknobs? I see no difference between this and littering! There is a big difference between junk mail left at your door or on your car and junk mail actually delivered to your mailbox. For starters, I pick up mail from my mailbox anyway. Even though I have to dispose of the junk, I'm not going out of my way to collect the junk. Ads left on my doorknob or windshield, however, are extra work to pick up. And yet if I don't pick them up, and let them just fly about or fall to the ground, am I the one who is littering?!? If this form of advertising is legal, then I'm going to start taking my filled garbage bags to businesses and leave them at the door with a note that reads, "Garbage For Sale! Enjoy this free sample bag! Call Benny K for more details!" Seeing as how I'd gladly sell my garbage to these people, no one can accuse me of false advertising!
Thank you for listening to me gripe. I'm very interested in knowing what sort of "why" questions YOU have. Please comment and make your voice known. Disagree with anything I've said here? By all means, spout off. Why not?

4 comments:

  1. Regarding the question, why do people always sit next to you when there are plenty available seats...this applies to the bathroom. On campus the other day I was in a stall in a completely empty bathroom. Someone comes in and uses the stall next to mine! I hate that!

    Why are there always lines in women's restrooms? The other day I was in one; I started bending over to check for feet under the stalls. There were plenty of available stalls. I started directing people in front of me to them, but they didn't go. So I just went. I think the solution to this problem is not having gender-specific bathrooms. I know this will freak some people out, but we have all been to Old Navy and no one has been traumatized.

    Why are adult males usually referred to as men while adult females are more often referred to as girls than women? I think especially non-married and non-childrened women are referred to as girls when men in the same circumstances are called men.

    Why don't we learn from the past? Throughout history there has always exsisted people thinking they are better than others, based on color, religion, sexual status, etc. We have used those things to keep people in certain groups from having the same rights as others. Currently homophobia is affecting people's ability to realize that keeping rights from people that are homosexual is no different than keeping rights from people that are a different skin color.

    Why do females start their periods so young? There is no reason for it. Think of all the problems that would be solved if people could not reproduce until they were at least adults.

    Why does religion dictate so much? I am reading The Birth of Venus. It is interesting to note how women's roles change during different times in history based on religious teachings.

    Why is the death penalty legal? I don't understand the difference between illegal and legal murder. To me it seems the same as spanking. If you don't want your child to hit, why do you hit her/him.

    Why do people think that just because you have a cell phone, you should be constantly available?

    I could go on and on...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Why does Peter Gallagher get acting jobs?!?!?!?!?!?

    ReplyDelete
  3. Melanie, I couldn't agree more about the cell phone. I got a cell phone for MY convenience, not everybody else's! Yet, as you and I both know, people get really, really annoyed if you don't answer your cell phone, way more than they ever would if you didn't answer your home phone. I guess they figure because your phone is portable, you better have a rootin-tootin' good reason for not being at their beck and (pardon the pun) call.

    Amie-J -- ay carumba! I'm glad you don't suffer from confrontationaphobia like I do. I have a hard time making a fuss even if I'm completely in the right. But it sounds like you have had so many opportunities to complain, it's no wonder you're a pro! Nothing beats a calm, sophisticated, not-really-a-retort-but-it-is response, such as rolling up your window on the fast-food manager or thanking the KFC employee for "teaching" you to use the menu. I can hardly believe the examples you've provided! Gee, I hardly have any room to complain at all!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Like many, I am horrified to go "number two" in a public restroom. This is both because it seems horribly unhygenic and also because of the embarrasing noises (which, for me, even includes tearing the toilet paper, announcing that yes, at this moment I am about to swipe my hand through my nether regions like a debit card through the ATM...it brings me no solace that every one else does this as well...). Ironically, in my immature days (ha ha ha) I thought it would be incredibly funny to go into a public restroom stall with a huge water bottle, then proceed to make strained, sickly noises while pouring heavy streams of water into the toilet. Ah, the joy of adolescent daydreaming!

    By the way Mom, I'm afraid your theory of covering up noises doesn't really work for unnecessary urinal flushing...

    ReplyDelete