tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-82669752024-03-14T04:22:57.478-06:00Of Dew and Donuts and DiatribesFormerly <i>Benj (& Purge)</i>; formerly <i>Sucking on Oranges</i>Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.comBlogger734125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-54448721964753805042019-07-26T17:19:00.000-06:002019-07-26T17:19:15.375-06:00Sweet Dreams Aren’t Made of ThisJust over three weeks ago, I took a test that is one of only two or three significant hurdles standing between me and a job teaching high school (or middle school) English. The good news is, I feel extremely confident that I got almost every answer correct. The bad news is, I misunderstood something about the essay portion of the test, and that misunderstanding resulted in my not answering one of the two essay questions. It’s a big enough blunder that I may not get the minimum score necessary to obtain my teaching license this year. And that sucks—super, super badly. It’s all the worse that I performed so well on the rest of the test, because that means if I hadn’t been so stupid at the end, I would’ve been a shoo-in. Knowing that while also knowing that there’s a pretty good chance I won’t make it is terrible. Whether I meet the minimum requirement or not, it’s going to be close. Incredibly close. I will either barely make it, or barely not. Again, that’s because I performed so well on everything but the final essay question. Unfortunately, the last question is worth enough that I could be screwed. I’ll know as soon as the scores are posted, which should be any day now. Wish me luck.<br />
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Since I’m on the topic of dreams going to shit, I’ll mention that I’ve now dreamed two nights in a row about my new boss at work. They were stressful dreams in which my new boss was demanding a lot of me or making me accountable for tons of stupid crap. I no longer remember much about the dream from two nights ago, but I know I was trying to escape from somewhere. Literally. It was more like a school setting or something, I think, but the point is, I had to sneak out these doors in the middle of the night and run like crazy in the hopes of getting away. But I’d get caught and brought back. And whether she was my teacher or my boss or some other person of authority, the dream-character portrayed by my boss was the person from whom I was attempting to flee. What does that tell you? I don’t recall having nightmares like this about any of my former bosses. There are times I feel so desperate to leave my job, and yet I feel trapped. There isn’t anything promising that I can move into right now. The dreamer in me—no pun intended—says I’m meant for something more. And by “more,” I don’t mean something with more prestige or fame or money. I just mean more meaningful and more personally rewarding. I keep hoping it will happen if I just keep filling my life with the things that truly matter to me, that somehow some cool opportunity will just fall into my lap. I guess that’s naïve as hell, but if I knew a better way to follow my passion, I’d do it! I’m not against working my ass off for it. Problem is, I don’t even know where to start or how to proceed, other than doing what I’m already doing.<br />
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Depressing, isn’t it?Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-56936810773522714222019-06-12T14:53:00.001-06:002019-06-12T14:53:59.678-06:00Am I Female?I consider myself a very liberal person. I support same-sex marriage, the decriminalization of marijuana and prostitution, stricter gun laws, more generous attitudes toward immigration, the right to have abortions, and legally-available doctor-assisted suicide. I also support transgender persons using whatever restrooms they choose, and I think anybody who refuses to call a person by the person’s sincerely preferred pronouns is being an ass.<br />
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People make fun of the ignorantly racist white guy who defends himself by saying, “But I can’t be racist! I have a black friend!” Perhaps the preceding paragraph is my own attempt at eschewing blame for my narrow-minded ways, but I admit to being a bit perplexed by “gender” as the term is used today. I’m not sure what it means, and I’m tempted to think it means absolutely nothing. Until recently, I have always thought of myself as male and have had no issues with that. (Some would call this a form of “privilege,” and I wouldn’t argue. By no means do I feel I’ve struggled with issues surrounding gender and sexual orientation—which, to be clear, are not the same thing—in a way that comes anywhere near the struggles countless people have faced.) But lately, as I try to wrap my mind around what we’re even discussing when we discuss gender, I find myself questioning if it’s a useful term at all. Whether it’s because I’m buying into “gender” as I see the word defined for modern audiences <i>or </i>simply rejecting every definition I encounter, the end result seems to be the same: I might be female after all.<br />
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A year ago, <i>The</i> <i>New York Times</i> posted an article titled “<a href="https://www.nytimes.com/2018/06/21/style/lgbtq-gender-language.html">The ABCs of L.G.B.T.Q.I.A.+</a>.” Using this as a resource, I find myself fitting into several categories I once thought had no application to me. For example, if the “Q” in “LGBTQIA+” stands for “questioning”— a common interpretation—then the mere fact that I’m writing this blog post demonstrates that I am “Q.” However, I am also (in this moment of writing) a transgender person, at least according to the definition offered by the article. That is, I am someone “whose gender identity or gender expression differs from the biological sex … assigned at birth.” How so? Well, since I’m currently <i>questioning</i> whether or not I’m male, I’m clearly not expressing or identifying as male, which was the sex assigned to me at birth. This also makes me “gender nonconforming” and “nonbinary,” as I understand the terms. Apparently, I may even be a “graysexual,” which is defined as “someone who occasionally experiences sexual attraction but usually does not.” I doubt that I experience sexual attraction at least 51% of the time, but I don’t know if I’m supposed to include only my waking hours or only times when I’m actually seeing or thinking about another person, and I don’t know if it needs to be based on my entire lifespan, the last couple of weeks, or just since I woke up this morning.<br />
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At this point, some readers will think I’m being an arrogant and unsupportive smartass. I assure you, that’s not my intent. Of course, I don’t know how I could ever convince you of that. When I state things in a way that sounds absurd, my point is not to say that the <i>issue</i> is absurd or that the <i>people</i> who identify with one of the terms being discussed are absurd. Rather, I am expressing the fact that I am sincerely unclear about what these labels even mean. As a philosophy student—which I have been for the majority of my adult life—I was trained to be extremely picky about definitions. If a definition allowed for things it shouldn’t, it was considered problematic. The definition of “graysexual” provided by the <i>NYT</i> seems clearly too broad. As such, it is not entirely helpful. Some would wave their hands in annoyance and say, “Okay, Mr. Picky Pants, but you get the idea.” And maybe I do—loosely. But that doesn’t alleviate the problem so much as highlight it. <i>Am</i> I a graysexual? Can I <i>identify</i> as a graysexual? Who gets to decide? Does it matter what other people think, or only what I think? Do I have to fit <i>your </i>definition, or just my own? These questions are at the very heart of the debate, insofar as there is one, concerning gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation. I would normally think “graysexual” applies only to those who experience less sexual attraction than I do. But is it ever for me to decide who gets to claim that title and who doesn’t? What if someone who experiences sexual attraction more often than I do sincerely identifies as a graysexual? Is it my place to say that person <i>isn’t</i> or <i>can’t</i> be one? And if it <i>isn’t</i> my place to say, and if I recognize that fact and sincerely endorse it, then doesn’t it make rational sense for me also to identify as a graysexual, since the term will seem even more applicable to me?<br />
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The same rationale allows me—and perhaps even compels me—to accept that I am just as female as I am male. After all, what does “female” mean if it does not apply to biological sex? Is there any trait—any trait at all, other than self-identification—that is required for a person to be female? If not, then as a rational person, I will recognize the fact that nothing about me precludes me from identifying as female. In other words, I will see that I am as female as anyone can possibly be, if only I will accept the fact. And if I continue being rational, I <i>will</i> accept the fact—and voila, it turns out I am literally and truly female. And nobody can tell me I’m not. I have met the only requirement that exists. On the other hand, if there <i>is </i>a minimum requirement to being female … well, <i>what is it</i>? If physical characteristics have nothing to do with being female, then what personality traits must a female inhabit? Are we comfortable saying females necessarily possess certain personality traits, or that the absence of certain personality traits guarantees a person <i>is not</i> or <i>cannot</i> be a female no matter how that person sincerely identifies? That sounds contrary to the debate as I’ve understood it.<br />
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It doesn’t stop there. Once I have deduced that I am in fact female (<i>and</i> male by the same principles, <i>mutatis mutandis</i>), I will recognize the fact that I am a lesbian, since I am indeed attracted to other women. Of course, of the myriad people I’ve ever felt attracted to, I have only truly known the gender identity of a very small percentage. Many of them I have merely seen in passing and have known nothing more about them than their physical appearances. So, I am obviously attracted to people regardless of their gender identity, which according to the <i>NYT</i> makes me a pansexual. By the same source, I am also most certainly “genderqueer” and “gender fluid.”<br />
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Anyone who bristles at the conclusions I’ve drawn should not frown upon me. I’m not the bad guy—or woman, for that matter. If umbrage must be taken, it should be with the definitions provided by the <i>NYT</i> (and any definitions similar thereto). If they are inadequate, let it be known how. But be warned: definitions place boundaries on who or what can lay claim to a certain label. Do we wish to do that with labels pertaining to gender and sexual orientation? My gut tells me most liberals do not, which is fine by me—I’m willing to be a team player—but if we set any ground rules, we have to accept the consequences. I may lack imagination, but I’m finding it very difficult to think of any such rules that will simultaneously please liberals (myself included) and prevent rational persons such as myself from recognizing the fact that, like it or not, I am both male <i>and </i>female. At least we can agree on one thing: gender identity isn’t a matter of choice. As it turns out, it may be a matter of logic.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-29897740195205427202019-05-27T10:28:00.001-06:002019-05-27T10:31:28.066-06:00#KickAssBy50<table cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="float: left; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kuVpdu3yxUk/XOwO22y9jnI/AAAAAAAAF4k/Rt9_Hz_E3Uc2VvyDYVtpoLThEXNUsawMwCLcBGAs/s1600/david-talley-253974-unsplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1200" height="400" src="https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kuVpdu3yxUk/XOwO22y9jnI/AAAAAAAAF4k/Rt9_Hz_E3Uc2VvyDYVtpoLThEXNUsawMwCLcBGAs/s400/david-talley-253974-unsplash.jpg" width="298" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center; color: whitesmoke">Photo by <a href="https://unsplash.com/photos/FWCjJ7VNm-k?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip-ink: auto; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out 0s, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out 0s; white-space: nowrap;">David Talley</a><span style="color: #111111; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: start; white-space: nowrap; color: whitesmoke"> on </span><a href="https://unsplash.com/search/photos/pacific-northwest?utm_source=unsplash&utm_medium=referral&utm_content=creditCopyText" style="box-sizing: border-box; color: #999999; font-family: -apple-system, BlinkMacSystemFont, "San Francisco", "Helvetica Neue", Helvetica, Ubuntu, Roboto, Noto, "Segoe UI", Arial, sans-serif; font-size: 12px; text-align: start; text-decoration-skip-ink: auto; transition: color 0.2s ease-in-out 0s, opacity 0.2s ease-in-out 0s; white-space: nowrap;">Unsplash</a></td></tr>
</tbody></table>Back in July 2017, Melanie and I took our boys to Seattle. They had never been there, and one of Melanie’s brothers had moved to the area several years earlier when he took a job with Microsoft. We stayed with his family in the quaint and pleasant suburb of Duvall. It was a really great experience. Something about the Pacific Northwest speaks to my soul. I fell in love with it within minutes—literally—of exiting SeaTac airport on my first visit back in 1992. As soon as I felt the crisp Washington air and beheld the gray skies and abundance of lush green trees, I was absolutely smitten. Fortunately, I’ve been able to visit this particular corner of the world many times now. Melanie and I even honeymooned in Seattle and British Columbia. Without exaggeration, I often feel “homesick” for the place. Of the very few items on my bucket list, living in the Pacific Northwest may just be at the top.<br />
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If you’re like me, being on vacation—especially somewhere that you really love—naturally leads to an examination of your life. Freed from the burdens of everyday life—from the day-to-day responsibilities, obligations, and “have to’s”—you have an opportunity to connect with your true self, to take inventory of your hopes, dreams, and ambitions, and to reassess your life trajectory. I have always found myself in a rather self-reflective state when visiting the PNW. It has always left me inspired. Of course, the weeds of normal life grow at an alarmingly fast rate; they often choke one’s motivation within a day or two of returning home. But thanks to a little catchphrase, my 2017 visit to Seattle has stuck with me a little better than most.<br />
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“Kick ass by 50.” That’s my goal. And it’s a holistic goal. By the time I am 50 years old, I want to be living the best life I’ve ever lived. It’s not just about me as a person. Yes, I hope to be in very good physical health, even if that is necessarily followed by an asterisk that notes “some restrictions apply.” Yes, I hope to have made tremendous advancements as a musician. Yes, I hope to have read a lot of great books and to have seen a lot of amazing movies. But it goes beyond that. I want to kick ass at 50, but I also want <i>my life</i> to kick ass when I’m 50. Do you see the difference? To the maximum degree possible, I want every moment of my waking hours to feel like a manifestation of <i>me</i>. This means I need to be in a career that feels like <i>me</i>. It’s not enough to have a secure job that sufficiently pays the bills. This means the way I spend my free time needs to feel like an investment in and/or an expression of the<i> me </i>that I like the most. At the risk of sounding like a whiny, entitled, self-absorbed teenager—although I’m probably ripe for the type of midlife crisis that would lend to such attitudes—I want my home, my clothes, my car, and everything else to feel like a manifestation of <i>me</i>.<br />
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Let me be clear. I’m not talking about being a selfish prick. I’m not talking about being immature or irresponsible. I’m not talking about being a self-centered asshole who doesn’t care how my actions impact the people and the world around me. If you know me, you know those sorts of attitudes don’t describe me at all. (Well, mostly.) What I’m talking about is something that I believe any rational and reasonably intelligent person would agree with and endorse, and something that we probably all seek. I even believe there is a moral obligation to pursue the type of life I mean. (More on that in a future post.) I have felt all too cognizant of the fact that life is fleeting. Because of that, I can get pretty depressed when I realize just how rarely I see the <i>me</i> that I absolutely love and adore. Yes, there is a <i>me </i>that I think is pretty darn awesome. And unique. And I believe everyone has that inside them. Which is what makes it so incredibly tragic if those beautiful, unique, wonderful individuals are mostly kept in a box and rarely see the light of day. No offense to anyone who believes in reincarnation, but none of us is coming around again. This is it. If the <i>best</i> you—by which I mean the <i>real</i> you—gets to come out and play only once in a blue moon—that is, if the <i>one</i> person whose life you’ve been most intimately entrusted with—<i>yourself</i>—only gets to make an occasional guest appearance in this world … well, that’s just a tragedy beyond anything else I can possibly imagine.<br />
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I consider myself fortunate that my life has been moving steadily in the “kick ass” direction since moving back to Utah in 2014. There’s still plenty of work to do, which is probably why I chose “kick ass by 50” rather than “kick ass by 45” or what would’ve been the extremely ambitious goal of “kick ass by 39.” I’m now 40, a little bit more kick ass than I was at 39 but nowhere near the kick ass I’ll be at 50. That said, I hope to make great kick ass strides every year between now and then. I really believe I will, and that’s rather exciting. Oh, and lest there be any confusion, I don’t plan to retire from kick-assery at 50. I’ll keep going with it. Perhaps I’ll set a new goal at that time. Bad ass motherfucker by 80 or some such. We’ll see.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-1108591668911449162019-05-21T18:56:00.000-06:002019-05-21T18:56:29.853-06:00Of Carrots and Chord ProgressionsThis past weekend, I participated in a two-day concert event put on by my guitar school. Approximately 10 bands played three songs each on both Friday and Saturday night. Even though things never go quite as smoothly as I hope—sometimes I feel destined to do my worst when I’m in front of an audience—it was nice to spend a whole weekend devoted to being a musician. Not only do I enjoy the opportunity to perform, but I enjoy the validation I get from a solid performance. When I know it went well, I feel my musicianship confirmed. When I leave the stage and a teenager stops me as I pass by to point his finger at my chest and state with the utmost conviction, “You! You. Are. A-maaa-zing!” I think maybe I’m not so crazy for feeling like music is my calling, that I really am most in my element when I’m playing it.<br />
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On Sunday night, I thought of the day job that awaited me on the morrow. The incongruity I felt is hard to put into words. In the past, I have tried to capture my feelings about my job by saying things like, “It feels so foreign to me,” “it feels so unlike me,” “I feel like a phony, an outsider, a pretender,” and so on. I worry these descriptions conjure the wrong ideas in other people’s minds, however. One could easily suppose I <i>hate </i>my job, that I find it <i>depressing</i> or <i>miserable</i>. But I don’t think those descriptions are accurate, at least not a majority of the time. Instead, my job feels like it has nothing to do with me. And that’s why I don’t think it’s a good fit. Sure, I could be much more miserable. Being in the military is the sort of job I would absolutely <i>hate</i>, find <i>depressing</i>, and feel 100% <i>miserable</i> in. Thank God that’s not my life. And yet my current job is one from which I often feel wholly detached. My team at work was recently assigned a book to read. The book is one of those self-help for the business-world type of books, all about how to be an effective manager. When I encounter business jargon—revenue, return-on-investment, spreadsheets—I cannot explain how utterly <i>dead</i> those words are to me. It’s not that I recoil at them. It’s that I feel absolutely <i>nothing</i> toward them. It’s the same emotional response you’d get from me if you had me read a book that was just a series of random numbers. It is sterile. Lifeless. Non-existent, somehow. I wish I could better put it into words, but I don’t know what else I can say. If you created a Venn diagram where you put everything that seems <i>real</i> about me into a circle, and you put all of this business crap in another circle, there would be no overlap whatsoever. But of course, my day job does revolve around the business world, so my life does overlap with it in some sense. But not in a way that feels <i>real</i>. It truly feels like the business world has absolutely nothing to do with me, and I don’t want really want it to.<br />
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Today, on Facebook, a friend of mine who is also a college professor posted that he had submitted final grades for the semester. Once in a while something innocent like this reminds that another world exists, a world that I once knew and occupied. There’s always something startling about it, this realization that a world better suited for me really exists and somehow persists without me. Part of me wants to cry out in genuine bafflement, “What the hell? How is this happening?” It’s not because I think that world <i>needs </i>me. It’s that it doesn’t make sense for me to be outside of it. There is always a sharp pang of recognition in these moments, a quasi out-of-body experience wherein I catch a glimpse of a life I once occupied but am now wholly invisible to. It’s weird and a bit unsettling. Have you ever tried to break a really thick stick, one that requires you to strain with all of your might and teases you with several seconds of cracking noises before it finally snaps in two? Has it ever required so much force that, once the stick does snap in half, a stinging sensation shoots through the overexerted muscles in your arms like a needle-thin bolt of lightning? That’s how it feels whenever I encounter this other world, the one that I should inhabit, and see that it doesn’t exist only in my imagination. It makes me homesick. I long to be part of that world—a world that revolves around intellectualism and artistic endeavors.<br />
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I was recently told at work that, over the next several months, my job will be expanding in such a way that I can look forward to a nice pay raise. One manager even told me I could end up making “lots” more money in the relatively near future. I was glad to hear that; it means the company is invested in me and that I don’t need to worry about losing my job any time soon. It also means that, if I stick with this company longer than I currently expect, I’ll at least have a better income. But you may be surprised how little I care about the money. That’s just not the type of carrot I need dangled before my eyes. It won’t motivate me. I don’t want to run this race. I honestly think they could double my salary tomorrow, and it wouldn’t change anything about what I plan to do. The more they pay me, the more at ease I’ll be if it takes me longer to abandon ship than I think. But nothing’s going to stop me from climbing into that lifeboat and heading for a new shore. Wish me luck.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-41874223042170529342019-05-11T16:39:00.000-06:002019-05-11T16:41:07.008-06:00Resurrecting a Repository of RuminationsIt’s likely premature to declare this blog resurrected, although I have rechristened it, changed the appearance a bit, and find myself posting for the first time in over a year. This will again be a living, breathing blog only if I post consistently, which is something I haven’t done since early 2016. Why would anything change now? Well, I have my reasons for thinking this could truly be the beginning of a blogging renaissance for me. I’ve been on quite a “gotta-get-back-to-being-me” kick lately. Granted, much of what I’ve done over the past five years—leaving a Ph.D. program, changing religions, getting a job, re-immersing myself in music, and later leaving religion altogether—has been the result of my seeking to make life more perfect, more my own, more what I personally desire it to be. And life has gotten better over the last five years—in rather tremendous ways. But I feel I am on the cusp of yet another monumental transition, one that will reclaim elements of my past that I love and dearly miss, and yet that somehow became the proverbial baby who was thrown out with the bath water.<br />
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I’m eager to share my intentions, because I find them exciting. And yet I also fear certain people learning of my intentions before I want them to. It’s a ridiculous paranoia, I know, given that nobody reads this blog. There’s no doubt that I’m speaking into a void. And yet what if a random Google search by a co-worker were to land them upon my page? Or has in the past, and that person subscribed to my posts without ever telling me? As unlikely as that may be, it’s not a totally absurd notion. I’m pretty sure I Googled all of my co-workers at some point in time or another. It’s what we do as humans nowadays, isn’t it? I’ve never used my surname on this blog, but it’s otherwise been a pretty open book. Hell, anyone who’s talked to me for five minutes can deduce that “Ben + Diet Mountain Dew” would make a strong Google search if you were trying to track down my online presence. It wouldn’t surprise me if this blog were the #1 search result for that particular phrase.<br />
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Alas, I shall throw caution to the wind and speak as if there is someone listening, but only someone I feel safe talking to. Like any other story, the one I’m about to tell could be made longer or shorter, and the longer version could be made longer still. I will aim for brevity, but it’s never been my strong suit, particularly when I’m writing about my own life. There are so many thoughts and feelings, and I have a tendency to try to capture them all. But enough of the preliminaries. I will skip right to the juicy stuff, then backtrack and add details until I grow sufficiently bored. The bottom line is this: I am actively pursuing a career as an English teacher on the secondary school level, preferably high school. I haven’t applied for any teaching jobs yet, but I’ve taken steps toward acquiring my teaching license. In Utah, this includes signing up for a Praxis exam and doing a background check. So long as I pass the exam (which I take in early July) and the background check (which I already have), then it’s just a matter of filling out some forms and paying some fees before I’m officially licensed to teach. This is because I already have a bachelor’s degree. In something. It doesn’t even matter what my degrees are in, provided I pass the Praxis. Isn’t that awesome? Up until a few weeks ago, I had no idea it could be this easy. Fortunately for me, a teacher shortage compelled the State of Utah in 2016 to allow people like me to acquire teaching licenses in the manner I’ve described. If that weren’t exciting enough, I looked into the necessary exam for someone wanting to teach English at the secondary level, and I was shocked just how many of the practice exam questions were absolute no-brainers to me. Questions related to poetic structure and/or pedagogy aren’t my strong suit, given that I didn’t major or minor in English. But I can learn enough of that stuff between now and July to pass the Praxis exam without a problem. I’m thrilled! So thrilled, in fact, that I now find it almost unbearable to be at my current job. I just hope I can land a teaching gig for the fall. It’s rather late in the calendar year for me to be starting down this road, but I remain optimistic. Perhaps I’m more optimistic than I deserve to be, but I’m optimistic nevertheless.<br />
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For the record, it is both my desire to teach and my desire to leave my current job that motivate me. I enjoyed teaching college as a graduate student. I didn’t abandon my Ph.D. program because I didn’t like the idea of teaching. On the contrary, I realized I only liked the teaching. And that was because I was teaching undergraduate courses. The idea of seeking a tenure-track position at a research university, where I would teach grad students and be held to the “publish or perish” model of professional accountability, was anything but appealing to me. And that’s why I decided against completing my Ph.D. The idea of teaching, however, is one I’ve never completely given up on. And I’ve long been open to the idea of teaching high school. I just didn’t know it was such a live possibility for me. I thought it would require going back to school and getting an education degree, and that just feels like too much to take on at this point in my life. But knowing I can teach as easily as I can—well, it’s rekindled a fire I thought was all but permanently extinguished.<br />
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On the other side of the same coin is the fact that my current job is, at its best, unfulfilling. Up until recently, I’ve been rather content in my job because it has been low-stress and there are so many great perks—schedule flexibility, the ability to work from home, tons of PTO, etc. But there has long been a part of me that is fully aware I am wasting my potential by staying at my job. I have always wanted to do something meaningful, something existentially valuable. A job in marketing is <i>never</i> going to fit the bill. And so it feels like a genuine tragedy—and I actually mean that very literally—when I think of the time I’m wasting in a job like I currently have. Recently, my dissatisfaction has only increased as the aforementioned perks have been scaled back and new management has taken my job in a different direction. The pay has increased, and I’ve been promised another raise around the corner. But that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I couldn’t care less about what I do. It feels so wholly other to me, so ill-fitting for my personality and interests. I want my life to be a manifestation of <i>me</i>. Anything else is bat-shit crazy, isn’t it? It’s just a damn shame I’m in my forties and still have to iron out so many wrinkles.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-61926458873458223932018-03-26T16:31:00.001-06:002019-05-11T21:56:39.924-06:00Dragon Lights, Dragon Lies<a href="https://saltlakecity.tianyuculture.us/">Dragon Lights</a> is a Chinese-themed festival running through May 6th at the Utah State Fairpark. I saw something about it on Facebook, thought it looked pretty cool, and bought tickets for the family. Our tickets were for yesterday, Sunday, March 25th. I bought the tickets only a couple of days in advance, on a day when <a href="https://weather.com/">Weather.com</a> showed absolutely nothing worrisome in its Sunday forecast. The plan was for us to have an early dinner at one of our favorite Utah Chinese restaurants (located about 25 minutes away) and then backtrack to the fairgrounds. It would be a fun and different way for us to spend time together as a family. I was really looking forward to it.<br />
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Sunday morning came and went. The weather was nice. Then, around the time we were to head out, it started snowing. And then it started to snow harder. And harder. While this was disappointing because it didn’t sound fun to walk around in such bad weather, we didn’t have the option of changing our plans. The tickets were date-specific, and as the Dragon Lights website reports in their FAQ section, the festival would be held come “rain, snow or shine.” Plus, even when the snow started coming down fairly fast and furious, Weather.com showed nothing in the hourly forecast about snow. Probably, it would all let up quite soon.<br />
<br />
Melanie, the boys, and I piled into our car and headed to the freeway. As we cruised down (up? We were going north, after all) the Interstate, I felt increasingly uncomfortable with our commute. I suggested we go to a much closer Chinese restaurant, one I had been to a couple of times but that Melanie and the boys had not. Nobody had any objections, so I exited the freeway and quickly found the alternate restaurant. It was closed for the Sabbath. Damn!<br />
<br />
I shrugged and figured I’d try again to head to Bountiful, the location of our first-choice Chinese restaurant. Meanwhile, Melanie started searching for nearby Chinese restaurants on her phone. My rekindled determination to get to Bountiful quickly fizzled when, once again, I found it very difficult to see through the snow while driving on the freeway. Melanie suggested that we eat at <a href="http://www.esampan.com/home">Sampan</a>, a nearby Chinese restaurant Melanie and I were quite fond of back before we got married. I had no interest in driving all the way to Bountiful via city streets, so I agreed. Within a few minutes, we were safe, cozy, and relaxed, sitting at a table and looking over our menus.<br />
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Our food was great. It’s probably the best Chinese food I’ve had since moving back to Utah. I don’t know why we haven’t revisited Sampan before now. I’ve tried several other Chinese places since moving back, and only a few have seemed adequate, much less quite tasty. Perhaps because I so loved the Chinese restaurant we used to frequent while living in Tallahassee, I had zero hope of finding anything of note in Utah. Adequate was the best I had hoped for. And maybe I just assumed that Sampan would be as mediocre as anything else, after being disillusioned by my first few forays into Chinese cuisine as a recently returned Utah native. But, man, Sampan was yummy. The boys thought so, too, as did Melanie. Hanging out together at a restaurant in-and-of itself was also quite lovely. We really enjoyed our time. And, wouldn’t you know it, the snow let up quite a bit while we dined. It didn’t stop snowing completely, but it had been reduced to small flakes falling in slow motion. Nothing to worry about whatsoever.<br />
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With full bellies, we climbed back into our car and headed to the Utah State Fairpark. A minor detour was involved, thanks to a slow-moving freight train—a common occurrence in that neighborhood, as I remember from my childhood. (I grew up relatively close to the fairgrounds. A junior high field trip even involved walking there, which I thought was nuts at the time and perhaps even more nuts now.) But, despite arriving nearly 90 minutes later than I had wanted and planned to, we finally made it.<br />
<br />
Then we saw the sign. Dragon Lights had been canceled for the evening, I can only assume due to weather. The bastards.<br />
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As I said, the festival runs through the beginning of May, and according to the posted sign, we can use our tickets for any other day. But the only reason we fought through the snow in the first place was because the Dragon Lights website had ensured us that it would not be canceled due to inclement weather. It wasn’t pee pee in my Coke, but it felt like a joke, that’s for sure.<br />
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Oh well. We still had a good time.<br />
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<br />Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-57733722273294394402017-09-22T17:55:00.000-06:002017-09-22T17:55:23.393-06:00Trimming the FatAs much as I wish this were a post celebrating weight loss, it’s not. I’m probably heavier than I was when I last wrote a blog post, which was back in February. Heavier physiologically, but not heavier emotionally or psychologically. And that brings me to the real point of this post: the simplification of life and the joy it brings.<br />
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Though there is not a single defining moment to point to, the summer of 2017 was a revolutionary one for me. In some ways, it was a time of embracing. In other ways, it was a time of letting go. The end result is that I am more happy and satisfied in life than perhaps I have ever been as an adult. Or maybe ever. And because I’m quite pleased with the ways in which I’ve fine tuned my life, I have every reason to be optimistic about the future. The course I am on is a rewarding and fruitful one. I am eager and excited to travel further down this road.<br />
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So as not to be obnoxiously vague, allow me to say more about the changes that have taken place over the last few months. The most important is my involvement with music. Every year, the guitar school from which I take private lessons offers various summer programs that are meant to supplement one’s private lessons. I did not participate in any such programs in the summer of 2016, at which point I had barely become a student at the school. But for Summer 2017, I enrolled in a program that put me together with three other guitarists and a drummer (none of whom I had ever met). Every Thursday evening, we got together to learn and rehearse songs that we would eventually play at an end-of-summer outdoor concert. I absolutely loved it. Almost every time we got together and played, I found myself thinking, “This is me. This is who I am.” I felt more connected to my “true self” than I ever had before. Not that I don’t play guitar on my own, but it’s different to be in a band setting. And the fact is, playing with others made me so much better. We’re not talking about minor improvement here. It’s hard to put into words, but if the player I was at the beginning of summer could see the player I was by summer’s end, I would scarcely have believed it.<br />
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In a similar vein, I have made great strides as a vocalist. I actually sang one of the songs we did at the end-of-summer concert—a cover of The Doors’ “Roadhouse Blues,” which isn’t the most flattering song for my voice, really—but that’s not what I regard as an accomplishment. You see, once I knew I would be singing a song at the concert, I started paying even closer attention to my vocal abilities. Not only did I spend a fair amount of time singing along with the radio on my way to and from work, as I had always done, but I started doing things like recording myself as I sang and then listening back to it. The outcome? Soul-crushing heartbreak, to be quite honest. I sounded so much shittier than I expected. I never thought I sounded amazing as I was singing, but playing it back on a recording, I sounded so much worse than I had ever realized. And it devastated me. So, in desperation, I started looking into some vocal exercises. Truth be told, I didn’t even do that much in this department. But the extremely little that I did—and I’m telling you, it was next to nothing—had instantaneous results. Seriously. There were like two or three little things I did, but from the moment I started doing them—and I’m not kidding, I really mean within the first 30 seconds or something—I noticed things about my voice or what I was doing with my throat, etc., that gave me better control and more awareness of how to use my voice. And so, once again, if the me from May or June could see where I am at today, I would have been a bit flabbergasted. Don’t get me wrong, I’m nowhere near incredible. Nobody’s ever going to want to listen to me sing just because my voice is so gosh darn beautiful. But I am way, way, way, way better than I was just a few months ago. It’s quite shocking. And now I drive home from work singing my guts out and not even sheepishly trying to hide it when other cars get too close, like I used to do.<br />
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My involvement with music has definitely played the biggest role in making me happier than I’ve ever been. But so has the general overall focus my life has taken. That is, outside of work, music, and my family—which I list in no particular order, so don’t read into it—I have almost nothing else on my plate. And it’s blissful. It’s such a 180 from how life felt one year ago. As my poor wife can tell you, I spent so much time complaining and freaking out last year because I never had time to do anything that mattered to me. I was constantly stressed, and I never felt able to get done the things I “had” to do, much less the things I actually <i>wanted </i>to do. In hindsight, I’m not even sure what it was that occupied so much of my time. But I know my to-do list was always a mile long, and I know it felt like at least 50% of the items added to that list would not be completed before another 10 or 20 items were added on top. It just felt like chaos, and it seemed like there was never any time for <i>me</i>. Well, focusing on music, which has always been my first love, certainly helps matters. It ensures that I don’t feel like an ignored aspect of my own life. But it’s the <i>cumulative</i> effect of focusing <i>more </i>on music and <i>less</i> on other things that really makes life grand. And there have been many things I’ve cut back on. Purposely, intentionally, and giddily.<br />
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One thing I have proactively reduced in my life is ecclesiastical responsibility. The church I attend has a rather small congregation. Because we are small, simply being a member of the church provides one with ample opportunity to help out. On the other side of that coin, it provides one with ample opportunity to feel guilty and/or stressed out. I’ve never had the time to commit to the church that some of my more enthusiastic (and less-employed) cohorts do, but I’ve tried to be very involved since I started attending this church nearly three years ago. For almost two years, I’ve served in the pastorate. I’ve had many wonderful experiences that I sincerely cherish, and depending on whom or what you compare me and my situation to, a case could be made that my church responsibilities are not all that burdensome or time-consuming. Be that as it may, church had recently become a consistent source of anxiety for me. Many weeks, I found myself thinking that, if not for church-related duties, life would be well-balanced, wholly manageable, and rather pleasant. The addition of those church duties, however, was just enough to make everything spiral. Time and time and time again, church was the tipping point between calmness and chaos.<br />
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Eventually, I realized that my mental and emotional wellbeing were not a tithe I could afford. In late August, I reneged on my agreement to preach an upcoming sermon and declared myself unavailable to preach or preside (i.e. oversee a worship service) at any point between now and the end of the year. In and of itself, I don’t see this as a huge deal. I still attend church regularly—though I also skip it regularly, and usually with great satisfaction—and I am even teaching one of the Sunday school classes this week, a responsibility for which I volunteered without having to be asked. (I’m the one in charge of asking people to teach Sunday school, as a matter of fact). So, it’s not like I’ve decided church has no place in my life. Far from it. But as simple a change as this is, it feels tremendously freeing. I feel so at ease, so content. I look forward to preaching and presiding again at some point in time, but my involvement is going to be significantly scaled back for the foreseeable future.<br />
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There are other ways in which I’ve reallocated my time, but nothing quite as noteworthy as what’s already been discussed. A lot of little changes have contributed to a more satisfying life. This includes minor adjustments to my work schedule, adjustments that have come about in response to a variety of factors. Long story short, I tend to get to work a little bit earlier than I used to, and often I’m not staying as late into the day. Consequently, I get a surprising amount of things accomplished in the evenings, and I feel much more connected to my family. It’s a win-win, and it’s definitely part of why I’m loving my life right now.<br />
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As I draw ever nearer to being a middle-aged man, I am repeatedly convinced that adulthood is—or should be—about fine tuning one’s life. Call it living authentically. Call it self-awareness. Call it confidence. Call it a combination of the above. Call it whatever you want. I just think it’s great. I still get my hopes up that my best years are ahead of me—which may be naïve and may be a recipe for utter disappointment. But if these past few months are any indication, I think it’s quite possible that my greatest joy is yet to be experienced. After all, if you had asked me at the beginning of summer, I would’ve said these last few <i>years</i> have been my most satisfying. And look at how much it’s improved since then. This is what a focused life can do for you. I don’t “want it all,” as the saying goes. That strikes me as immature. No, I want relatively few things. And usually, I have too much. But the beautiful thing about cutting out the excess is that you suddenly find yourself with a <i>shitload</i> of the relatively little that you want. And <i>that</i> is when you know you’re living the good life.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-2243390388297518932017-02-11T14:18:00.000-07:002017-02-11T14:18:15.881-07:002016 in Review: TelevisionLet’s talk TV.<br />
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Polygamy was a major interest of mine when it came to what I watched on the small screen during 2016. Melanie and I discovered three new—and, in the case of two of them, already cancelled—cable series about the polygamous lifestyle. First up was <b><i>My Five Wives</i></b>, a kind of post-religious, secular cousin of TLC’s <i>Sister Wives</i>. <i>My Five Wives </i>features a family who is no longer religious but whose polygamous beginnings were rooted in religious conviction. I mentioned this family when I wrote about <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/08/sunstone-2016.html">my adventures at the Sunstone Symposium</a> back in the summer. Like <i>Sister Wives</i>, this show focused on the day-to-day practicalities of living polygamy: the husband’s efforts to balance time between the wives, tensions that arise among the wives themselves, etc. The post-religious component of the show gave it a unique bent, one that resonated with me as a person who has gone through a significant faith transition. Unfortunately, the show was canceled after just one season.<br />
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Next up is <b><i>Escaping Polygamy</i></b>. This quickly became my favorite “reality TV” polygamy show, even though it is far more sensationalized than the others. It can be a bit over the top in that regard, but at the heart of the show is something genuinely fascinating. The series follows the efforts of three women, all of whom defected from polygamy as teenagers, as they help others to do the same. The most beguiling aspect of the show is that it strikes so close to home, both literally and figuratively. Though I wasn’t raised in polygamy, I spent nearly 40 years in the LDS Church from which these polygamist sects sprang. There are often surprising similarities between the polygamist groups and the LDS Church, culturally speaking, which mesmerizes me as an ex-Mormon. Additionally, so much of what takes place in the show happens in or very near Salt Lake City. It’s amazing the wild things that are secretly going on all around me, masked by a façade of pleasant valley suburban America. Of the three polygamy shows I discuss in this blog post, <i>Escaping Polygamy</i> is the only one that has not been discontinued.<br />
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The final polygamy show we watched was <b><i>Polygamy, USA</i></b>. It was featured on the National Geographic Channel, which means the tone was vastly different from the other polygamy shows I’ve mentioned. It was more of a legitimate documentary. I am a fan of documentaries, but this one sometimes felt like the educational videos I remember watching in school as a kid—very dry and very subdued. I was bored during some of the earlier episodes. However, I was sufficiently engrossed by the end of the season (which also marked the end of the series). Unlike any other reality TV series, <i>Polygamy, USA</i> focuses on those living loyally the fundamentalist Mormon polygamist lifestyle. The polygamists of Centennial Park broke away from the FLDS Church, the latter of which is what many Americans imagine when they hear the word “polygamy”—women in prairie dresses, strict obedience to church leaders, a strong sense of patriarchy, private communities, child brides, etc. Centennial Park is a slightly liberal version thereof, forbidding marriage to underage girls, placing the responsibility of choosing a spouse on the women rather than the men, and (clearly) allowing cameras into their otherwise isolated community. Want to see what it’s like for newlyweds to engage in awkward conversations where they are trying to learn some of the most basic facts about each other? This is a good show for you.<br />
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Most of the TV shows I discovered in 2016 had nothing to do with polygamy, of course. Let’s take a look at what I found.<br />
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<b>WINNERS</b><br />
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<b><i>Ash vs. Evil Dead</i></b><br />
I was stoked when I learned that Sam Raimi’s <i>Evil Dead</i> trilogy would receive a sequel in the form of a television series. <i>Ash vs. Evil Dead</i>, which is as ridiculously hyperviolent as you’d expect, does not disappoint.<br />
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<b><i>Making a Murderer</i></b><br />
I know, I know. <i>Making a Murderer</i> is so 2015. Well, Melanie and I were late for the party. So what? We can see why the show was so compelling, and we’ll definitely be on board when Season 2 finally makes its premiere—whenever that will be.<br />
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<b><i>Mr. Robot</i></b><br />
I have mixed feelings about this show. I quite liked it whenever I watched an episode, but I rarely felt eager to watch it. Even now, Season 2 remains completely unwatched despite being on our DVR for months. Although it qualifies as a thriller, there is something very slow-moving about it. I think this is a case of the show being slightly better than it is enjoyable, if that makes sense.<br />
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<b><i>Stranger Things</i></b><br />
See, we’re not always late to the party. Like everyone else, we loved it. Melanie and I watched the series once on our own, and then again with our boys. They liked it, too. Win-win.<br />
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<i><b>United States of Tara</b></i><br />
We had to reach way back into the 2009 vault to watch this one. I don’t know what mental health experts or those with dissociative identity disorder would say about this dramedy, starring Toni Collette as a woman balancing DID with the typical challenges of suburbia. There’s always a risk of treating these topics poorly. Admittedly, there were outlandish aspects to the plot, especially near the end, but overall I quite enjoyed the series’ fairly brief three-season stint. That being said, it is the weakest of shows I am putting into the “Winner” category.<br />
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RUNNERS-UP: <b><i>Flaked</i></b>; <b><i>Love</i></b>; <b><i>Master of None</i></b>; <b><i>Red Oaks</i></b>.<br />
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<br />
<b>ON THE FENCE</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
<b><i>Casual</i></b><br />
This is probably the least enjoyable show that I haven’t completely given up on. None of the main characters are likeable. I’ve watched this one only when I’ve somehow managed to catch up on others and don’t yet want to start something new.<br />
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<b><i>Fuller House</i></b><br />
Okay, let me explain. I wouldn’t say I like this show. But I’ve seen several episodes, and that’s just me being a forthright and honest guy. We tried it one night as a family, wondering if our kids would enjoy it. They kind of do, so we’ve had it on a few times. In all fairness, we haven’t even watched the full first season. We watched two episodes in July, and another three in November. Clearly, we’re not chomping at the bit.<br />
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<b><i>The Man in the High Castle</i></b><br />
This is a critically acclaimed show, and Melanie and I watched the first several episodes. We then lost touch with it. It’s another one of those shows that is pretty good, but just so slow and tranquil that it often puts me to sleep. Hence, I’ve never been super motivated to watch it.<br />
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<b><i>Speechless</i></b><br />
Speechless received positive press for putting a special-needs teenager—one who can’t speak, hence the name of the show—at the forefront. Unfortunately, the family around which the show revolves is not particularly likeable. The mother, played by Minnie Driver, is particularly obnoxious. Furthermore, the family as a whole hasn’t gelled in terms of who they are. Sometimes they come off as trailer trash, and sometimes they come off as domineering elitists. I honestly don’t know if we’re supposed to consider them good guys or bad guys. Sometimes such ambiguity is the strength of a show. Here, it just seems sloppy and ill-formed.<br />
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<b>DUDS</b><br />
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<b><i>12 Monkeys</i></b><br />
The movie <i>12 Monkeys</i> was great. I had high hopes for the TV show. I got through one episode and just didn’t want to continue with it. It wasn’t terrible. It just didn’t click with me.<br />
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<b><i>Documentary Now!</i></b><br />
Fred Armisen and Bill Hader in a mockumentary television series? Sounds like heaven! And that’s what I thought, until I watched the incredibly boring and unfunny first episode. I will probably give it another go sometime, but the humor in that first episode was just way, way, way too understated for my tastes.<br />
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The end.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-85248547251624625862017-01-30T18:56:00.000-07:002019-05-11T21:55:14.234-06:002016 in Review: MoviesIn recent years, I have dedicated the majority of January blog posts to a review of the previous year. I have typically broken up the previous year into a variety of subjects, only one of which was addressed per blog post: books, music, etc. I will continue this trend as I review 2016, but compared to years past, these reviews will be much more condensed. I simply don’t have time to go into great detail.<br />
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I will start my review of 2016 with <b>movies</b>. In 2016, I saw 102 movies that I had never before seen. Rating them on a standard four-star scale, with zero stars being an absolutely crappy film and four stars being an undeniably excellent film, I gave an average score of **½. That keeps in tradition with years past, I believe.<br />
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My personal favorite film of 2016 (which isn’t necessarily the absolute best film of 2016) is <b><i>Sing Street</i></b>. This independent charmer is about a group of boys who start a band in 1980s Ireland. It is an ode to everything I love: music, the 1980s, twitterpation, and dreaming. I probably shouldn’t admit how much the mental life of the teenage protagonist mirrors my own. Full disclosure: if I’ve interacted with you more than a few times in real life, chances are you’ve been part of an ultra-cheesy dance sequence in my head.<br />
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Other personal favorites that were actually released in 2016 include: <b><i>Zootopia</i></b>; <b><i>Hell or High Water</i></b>; <b><i>Kubo and the Two Strings</i></b>; <b><i>Deadpool</i></b>; <b><i>Swiss Army Man</i></b>; <b><i>Moana</i></b>; and <b><i>The Nice Guys</i></b>. Favorites that predate 2016 but weren’t seen by me until 2016 include: <b><i>The Big Short</i></b>; <b><i>The Revenant</i></b>; <b><i>Inside Out</i></b>; <b><i>The Lobster</i></b>; <b><i>Spotlight</i></b>; <b><i>Star Wars: The Force Awakens</i></b>; and <b><i>Hello, My Name is Doris</i></b>. Honorable mentions seen in 2016 (but released whenever) include: <b><i>Bridge of Spies</i></b>; <b><i>Brooklyn</i></b>; <b><i>Sicario</i></b>; <b><i>The Hateful Eight</i></b>; <b><i>Straight Outta Compton</i></b>; and <b><i>La La Land</i></b>.<br />
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The very worst film I saw in 2016 (and also from 2016) is a no-brainer, in more one ways than one: Kevin Smith’s <b><i>Yoga Hosers</i></b>. Other films I saw last year that fall squarely into the crap camp include: <b><i>Nine Lives</i></b>; <b><i>The Night Before</i></b>; <b><i>Once I Was a Beehive</i></b>; <b><i>The Brothers Grimsby</i></b>; and <b><i>Sisters</i></b>.<br />
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It’s a shame I don’t have time to go into further detail about movies. I actually kept slightly better notes on movies in 2016, and I tracked how my critiques compared to the aggregate scores found on Metacritic and IMDb. In theory, then, I have much more that I could say. Even so, I’ll keep my final comments brief.<br />
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The most overrated film I saw in 2016 was the 2012 documentary <b><i>Room 237</i></b>. I thought the film was rather bad, but it has a Metacritic score of 80, meaning the average movie critic rated it the equivalent of 80 out of 100 points. According to the critics, then, it’s essentially a ***½ movie. Wrong. The documentary showcases what are basically conspiracy theories surrounding Stanley Kubrick’s cinematic masterpiece <i>The Shining</i>. Unfortunately, the interpretations offered by those within the film are not compelling enough to make their lunacy entertaining.<br />
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<i>Deadpool</i> was the most underrated movie I saw in 2016, according to my own scores, but since I’ve mentioned that film already, I’ll instead mention the 2015 thriller <b><i>No Escape</i></b>. <i>No Escape </i>stars Owen Wilson, which may explain the film’s rather poor Metascore of 38—essentially *½. Wilson isn’t the type of actor you’d expect to see in a high-intensity thriller, much less as the lead character: a man whose vacationing family finds themselves in the midst of a violent overseas rebellion in which Americans quickly become targets. I myself was quite leery, but found the film sufficiently gripping. I thought it was good. Not great, but definitely good.<br />
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The end.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-1639232194506398972017-01-27T20:43:00.001-07:002019-05-11T16:41:06.634-06:00BOO!It’s me! I’m still here! It’s not over yet, folks!<br />
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That’s what I’d say to the readers of this blog, if I had any. As it is, I suppose I’m just talking to myself. That’s fine.<br />
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I’m coming up on the one-year anniversary of getting my first real job since leaving grad school. I guess I needed a one-year sabbatical, because lately I’ve been itching to reclaim many aspects of my life that I feel like I lost when I got a job. I just looked back on my 2016 blog entries, which are few, and apparently I never wrote about these feelings publicly. I did write about them in my private journal, however. While many great things came from my being employed, I also felt like a big part of me was lost. So many things that had defined me, aspects of my life and personality that I felt were being richly developed, things that were exhilarating and meaningful to me, quickly fell to the wayside. I just didn’t have time for them, and because I was so busy and preoccupied with other things, I hardly cared that those major parts of my life and personality had seemingly vanished. The one exception was music, which I made a greater priority in 2016 than it had been in years, possibly decades. I started taking guitar lessons again, and it has been a wonderfully fruitful endeavor. I’m loving it. But other things were lost, some more gradually than others, and I am only now starting to yearn for them again. Case in point, I read one book in 2016. One. A single book! I used to read between 40 and 50 books <i>per year</i>, and in 2016 I read <i>one</i>. Insanity! Well, now I really want to read again. I’m actually craving it, and I’m actually halfway through a book already. (Hugely impressive, isn’t it?) I also feel a strong desire to rekindle my spiritual life, which has been severely lacking over the last several months. And yes, I have a renewed interest in writing. Hence, this blog post.<br />
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It’s always temping after a long break in writing to try to sum up everything that’s happened between the previous entry and today. That ain’t going to happen. I’m stopping here. But there will be more to come. I truly believe this. We’ll see if I’m right.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-53177194132507245362016-09-10T12:47:00.000-06:002016-09-10T14:32:36.825-06:00More Thoughts on Polygamy, Pt. 3The more I examine LDS doctrine as an ex-member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints—commonly referred to as the Mormon Church—the less sense it makes. This surprises me because, for many years, I prided myself on being a rather reflective Mormon. I wouldn’t have thought I’d miss out on so many bizarre, problematic, improbable, outlandish, or blatantly nonsensical implications. In fact, I thought Mormonism was a particularly strong religion, philosophically speaking. And I guess I probably still think that of Mormonism, but I would make a distinction between Mormonism and LDS theology. The LDS Church believes its teachings simply <i>are</i> Mormonism. Why, they’ve even tried to prevent other sects from calling themselves Mormon, even when those sects trace their roots back to Joseph Smith and affirm the Book of Mormon as scripture. But Mormonism, to me, is something bigger than the LDS Church, and I don’t think the LDS Church is particularly good at practicing Mormonism. There is, from my perspective, a great deal of tension between the LDS Church and Mormonism, which is why some people such as myself who fall in love with Mormonism end up leaving the LDS Church when we realize the two don’t mesh. Put simply, the LDS Church doesn’t practice the Mormonism it purports to preach.<br />
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With my current interest in polygamy quite piqued, I have realized the explanations I was given in my youth for its practice are inadequate and unpersuasive. Now, there are numerous defenses of polygamy that have been offered over the years, many of which are quite familiar to the typical LDS person. I think they have all been shown to be problematic, based on historical and demographical inaccuracies, etc. But many of these—such as the idea that polygamy was a way to offer financial support to widows—are merely pointing to the supposed benefits of polygamy. They are not really explanations for why and how polygamy got started in the first place. As far as that goes, I know of only one explanation, and it is supported by official LDS scripture: Joseph Smith, the founding prophet of Mormonism, asked God about polygamy after seeing it in the Bible and was told that it was a divine law he would be required to obey if it was revealed and explained to him. <i>That’s</i> why polygamy got started, if you want the official LDS narrative.<br />
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There is a glaring problem here. The supposed revelation in which God explains polygamy and tells Joseph Smith he must obey it if it’s revealed to him has been canonized as LDS scripture. It’s section 132 of the Doctrine and Covenants. It’s something anybody can read. The logical implication is that every single person who reads the D&C is obligated to practice polygamy and that not doing so brings one under condemnation. Of course, Mormons actually believed this for several decades after the “revelation” was received. Early Mormon Apostle Heber C. Kimball taught, “You might as well deny ‘Mormonism,’ and turn away from it, as to oppose the plurality of wives. Let the Presidency of this Church, and the Twelve Apostles, and all the authorities unite and say with one voice that they will oppose the doctrine, and the whole of them will be damned.”<sup>1</sup> Meanwhile, Joseph F. Smith taught at the LDS Church’s 1878 general conference, “Some people have supposed that the doctrine of plural marriage was a sort of superfluity, or nonessential to the salvation or exaltation of mankind…. I want here to enter my solemn protest against this idea, for I know it is false.” And yet, despite the fact that anyone and everyone can now read D&C 132 and learn the “law” of plural marriage, the LDS Church today forbids its practice. Apparently, knowing the law is <i>not</i> sufficient for having to practice it—a notion that directly contradicts the official narrative for why polygamy ever got started in the first place.<br />
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Another problem: why did the requirement to practice polygamy extend beyond Joseph Smith when he was the only one to whom it was apparently revealed? Pretend for a moment that knowing about the law of plural marriage <i>does</i> obligate one to live it. As I’ve always heard and understood the story, God was warning Joseph that he was getting himself into something pretty serious and deep. It was like God was saying, “You know, Joe, once you open up this can of worms, there ain’t no going back. Are you sure you want to know about this stuff?” But if polygamy is such a sensitive, sacred, and touchy thing, why did Joseph’s curiosity have to kill the whole damn institutional cat? That is, why did the obligation to practice polygamy extend beyond the one person to whom it was initially revealed, beyond the one person who was supposedly willing to take upon himself such a burden? It doesn’t really add up.<br />
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But let’s go back to the fact that practicing polygamy, in this lifetime anyway, is now prohibited by the LDS Church. As I already suggested, this doesn’t make much sense given that anybody with an LDS Doctrine and Covenants can read about the law of polygamy, and knowing about the law of polygamy is supposedly what obligated Mormons to practice polygamy in the first place. As problematic as this is, let’s ignore it for a minute. Let us ask instead, why did the (official LDS) practice of polygamy come to an end? Much can be said about this, especially as it relates to politics and the desire for Utah to be granted statehood, but what is the official LDS narrative on the matter?<br />
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Again, we can turn to the D&C. In what is termed Official Declaration 1, LDS Church President Wilford Woodruff is quoted thusly: “The Lord showed me by vision and revelation exactly what would take place if we did not stop this practice. If we had not stopped it … confusion would reign throughout Israel, and many men would be made prisoners. This trouble would have come upon the whole Church, and we should have been compelled to stop the practice.” Woodruff proclaimed that if the Mormons continued to practice polygamy, it would come “at the cost of the confiscation and loss of all the Temples, and the stopping of all the ordinances therein, both for the living and the dead, and the imprisonment of the First Presidency and Twelve and the heads of families in the Church, and the confiscation of personal property of the people (all of which of themselves would stop the practice).” Never mind that, in times past, the Lord supposedly made allowances for ordinances to be performed outside of temples when circumstances required it. Never mind that, in the past, it was nearly a hallmark of being a true prophet that one would be persecuted, arrested, or both. Never mind that official LDS Church publications had previously declared, “It would be as easy for the United States to build a tower to remove the sun, as to remove polygamy, or the Church and kingdom of God.” Never mind that Woodruff himself had previously stated, “If we were to do away with polygamy ... then we must do away with prophets and Apostles, with revelation and the gifts and graces of the Gospel, and finally give up our religion altogether and turn sectarians…. We just can’t do that … come life or come death.” Never mind that LDS Church President John Taylor had also received a revelation, several years earlier, in which the Lord said of polygamy, “I have not revoked this law, nor will I, for it is everlasting, and those who enter into my glory must obey the conditions thereof, even so, Amen.”<br />
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To reiterate, the practice of polygamy was stopped, according to the official narrative, because it would cause too darn much harm to allow its continued practice.<br />
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How very ironic.<br />
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In total, polygamy was practiced in the LDS Church for approximately 60 years. It has since been practiced by various offshoots of the LDS Church for nearly twice that long. I’m not saying polygamy was a good thing during the time the LDS Church sanctioned its practice, but even if we ignore that particular time period, the harm that has been caused by polygamy ever since the LDS Church disavowed it has been monumental. Assassinations, welfare fraud, ostracizing, rape, incest, and the sexual exploitation of children are just some of the things you’ll find taking place within polygamist communities, some on a regular basis. Yes, these things also happen outside of polygamist communities, but within such communities these acts are frequently tied directly to the community’s beliefs, teachings, and culture. In the Kingston group, for example, church leaders believe their bloodline can be traced back to Jesus Christ and must be kept pure. Incestuous marriages are thus fairly common. A brief look at the FLDS Church reveals practices too disgusting and disturbing to be worth repeating. Given the official LDS narrative, then, it appears that God was okay instituting polygamy knowing these atrocities would be the result. However, God was willing to stop polygamy in order to spare Wilford Woodruff and other high-ranking church leaders from going to jail.<br />
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It sure pays to be among the elect, doesn’t it? Feel free to take a vomit break. I’ll wait.<br />
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It is indeed an outlandish story the LDS Church weaves. Polygamy was so important that Joseph Smith <i>had</i> to practice it. God couldn’t allow otherwise—even though God would indeed allow otherwise just 60 years later, when the practice thereof would be an inconvenience—even though it was actually quite an inconvenience when it was first practiced, but that’s precisely why God warned Joseph Smith that he was getting himself into something he couldn’t get himself out of—except that you actually can get out of it, if it’s going to cause a lot of harm—even though God’s making people practice polygamy in the first place has led to way more harm than would’ve occurred had God never forced Joseph to practice it in the first place—but, of course, God couldn’t allow Joseph not to practice it, given that He was revealing the law of polygamy to Joseph and once you know about it, you have to practice it, no matter what—except that you really don’t, apparently.<br />
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Etc., etc., <i>ad absurdum</i>, <i>ad nauseum</i>.<br />
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<i>Ad nauseum</i>, indeed.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><sup>1</sup> All quotations in this blog entry, except those from the LDS Doctrine and Covenants, are conveniently located at <a href="http://www.mormonthink.com/joseph-smith-polygamy.htm#quotes">http://www.mormonthink.com/joseph-smith-polygamy.htm#quotes</a>. Those wishing for original sources may find them cited there.</span>Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-25853781585294531602016-09-02T20:42:00.000-06:002016-09-02T20:42:57.789-06:00More Thoughts on Polygamy, Pt. 2I’ve had a lot of thoughts swimming around in my head about polygamy. Some of them I shared in <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/08/more-thoughts-on-polygamy-pt-1.html">my previous post</a>, which was hastily written and published. I expect this post will be even more scattered than the last one. I’m just trying to capture some random thoughts and observations. Make of it what you will.<br />
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At the Sunstone Symposium, a woman said the following about why she and her family had chosen to leave the FLDS polygamous group around the time that Warren Jeffs came into power: “We left because we knew what was being taught didn’t match what was in the scriptures.” This isn’t an exact quote, but is as near as I can remember it. When I heard this, I could imagine many a Mormon nodding along, thinking this woman had acted so wisely to stick to the scriptures and not listen to anyone who tried to teach something counter to their message.<br />
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Oh, the irony! I honestly think one of the key reasons I became an unorthodox Mormon (back when I was still a member of the LDS Church) was my close study of the scriptures. More and more, I saw the modern LDS Church in opposition to the scriptures. Since leaving the LDS Church, these things stand out to me even more. Taking the Lord’s name in vain? That’s exactly what I see the LDS Church doing much of the time. Drawing near to God with their lips but otherwise denying Him? The LDS Church again. Calling bad things good and good things bad? You guessed it: the LDS Church. Trusting in the arm of flesh and denying the Holy Ghost? See also, LDS Church. False idols? Have I mentioned the LDS Church? But it goes beyond the principle-based stuff I’ve mentioned. Some teachings of the LDS Church are blatant and undeniable contradictions of what you find in scripture. To cite just one example, in LDS scripture, the Lord says, “Whoso believeth in me, and is baptized, the same shall … inherit the kingdom of God…. And whoso shall declare more or less than this, and establish it for my doctrine, the same cometh of evil, and is not built upon my rock” (3 Nephi 11:33, 40). Well, according to current LDS theology, you actually have to be baptized by the right people in order to inherit the kingdom of God, and being baptized by those people only allows you to inherit one-third of the kingdom of God, while truly inheriting all that the Father has requires being baptized by a Mormon, being confirmed a member of the LDS Church by a Mormon, dutifully attending LDS Church services, receiving the priesthood (if you have a penis) or pledging that someone with a penis will always rule over you (if you have a vagina), participating in sacred (but also secret) rituals within LDS temples, having your marriage sealed in an LDS temple by a Mormon, abstaining from alcohol, abstaining from tobacco, abstaining from tea, abstaining from coffee, not making unnecessary purchases on Sundays, giving 10% of your annual income to the LDS Church, and so on. (It also used to require having more than one wife—another rule that applies only to those with a penis.) Now what did 3 Nephi 11:40 say again? “And whoso shall declare more or less than [baptism and faith in Christ], and establish it for my doctrine, the same cometh of evil.” Yeah, well. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to.<br />
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Going back to polygamy, I guess it annoys me when I see Mormons acting like polygamists are nuts when they themselves are guilty of so many of the same things. I mentioned last time that one of the shows I’ve been watching lately is A&E’s <i><a href="http://www.aetv.com/shows/escaping-polygamy">Escaping Polygamy</a></i>. The show focuses on people fleeing from the polygamist communities in which they live. I was surprised how many people who choose to abandon polygamy nevertheless retain their fundamental religious beliefs. It’s not uncommon for the person fleeing polygamy to express a genuine concern that, because of her (or, much less often, his) choice to leave, she is going to be damned to Hell. These people are suffering so intensely that they are willing to choose eternity in Hell over life in polygamy, here and now. Super sad. Anyway, one of the main people on the show who helps others to escape—and who escaped herself from the Kingston group several years earlier—is now LDS. Maybe I’m reading into things, but I swear I’ve seen her balk at some of the comments that these former polygamists make. Not that I completely blame her. It’s wild to hear someone who has escaped the FLDS community express the belief that Warren Jeffs is a true prophet. It seems insane. But the LDS Church has a prophet, and the typical member of the LDS Church is unwilling to doubt anything that the LDS prophet says or does. The underlying mentality is the same. No, I don’t think Thomas S. Monson is a monster, and I wouldn’t want to compare him to Warren Jeffs. That’s not my point. Rather, I am comparing the unwavering confidence in and deference to church leaders that exists in both the FLDS community and the LDS Church. Thank God—literally—that Monson isn’t like Jeffs. But that doesn’t mean the LDS attitude toward church leaders is any healthier than it is in the FLDS community, at least from what I can tell. And thus it annoys me to see an LDS person roll her eyes at the “absurdity” of what an FLDS person believes.<br />
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Speaking of retained beliefs, another moment from <i>Escaping Polygamy</i> that stands out in my memory is when a person who had fled the FLDS Church talked about her experience meeting Warren Jeffs. Other people on the show, who had left a different polygamist group, were asking her how it felt. You could tell they expected it not to be a pleasant experience, as though the woman would have or should have sensed Jeffs’ depravity or something. But this woman, despite leaving, still believes Jeffs is a prophet. And when she talked about meeting Jeffs and shaking his hand, she described the experience as one that involved a sense of peace in her prophet’s presence. This isn’t one of those times when an LDS person scoffed, so that’s not my point. But I found it very interesting. LDS often point to feelings of peace as evidence that something is true, because they regard a feeling of peace as more or less synonymous with the presence of the Holy Ghost, and the Holy Ghost shows up and makes you feel peaceful precisely to inform you that something is true. That’s the Holy Ghost’s #1 job. So, in the LDS world, feelings of peace are markers of what is good and right. They play an essential role in gaining a personal testimony, to converting non-Mormons to the LDS Church (“Do you feel peaceful when I share my beliefs with you? You do!? Wonderful! That’s the Holy Ghost telling you my church is the one and only completely true church on the entire planet!”), and to living life in general (“I knew I should accept the job offer because I felt peaceful about it when I prayed for guidance, so now I know God wants me to take the job.”) Well, this ex-FLDS woman felt at peace when she met Warren Jeffs. How does that make any sense on the LDS model? It doesn’t, which means the typical LDS person will point the finger of blame at the woman herself. She was confused, or she fell prey to Satan’s trickery, or something. Just as the ex-FLDS woman probably “knows” it was the Spirit giving her those feelings, LDS folk “know” it wasn’t. Call it a win-win? <br />
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Probably the most poignant episode of <i>Escaping Polygamy</i>, for me, was one that aired only recently. It was about yet another woman who desired to leave the FLDS Church. She had a 13-year-old daughter that she hadn’t seen in three years, despite their both being FLDS. You see, the 13-year-old daughter, at the age of 10, had been selected to be part of the “United Order.” This gave the girl something of elite status, but it also removed her from her mother’s home and effectively severed their ties. As the mom described it, she (the mom herself) wasn’t “worthy” of seeing her daughter.<br />
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I was appalled. What kind of sick and twisted belief system would tell a mother she isn’t worthy of seeing her own child? The answer hit me like a ton of bricks: the LDS belief system. No, the LDS Church doesn’t literally and physically remove children from their parents just because the children are exceptionally righteous. Not in this life, anyway. But a key part of LDS theology is that, in the afterlife, families are together only in the celestial kingdom—the top bracket of the hereafter. Thus, as far as family relationships go, what the FLDS woman was experiencing today is exactly what the LDS Church teaches could happen to you tomorrow. Even if you’re a decent person, if your children are more “righteous” than you, it is quite possible that in the next life, they will be taken from you, to live with the elite class, and will no longer even be considered your children. You will not be worthy to go where they are, and you will be separated forevermore. Your children will literally be too good for you, and you will neither deserve nor be allowed to retain the title of mother or father.<br />
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I’m sorry, but this warrants profanity: <i>fuck that</i>.<br />
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Maybe I sound overdramatic, but this is some seriously sick shit. Few things about the LDS Church have hit me as hard as this realization. I’ve always known this was the doctrine of the LDS Church, but somehow it took seeing such an atrocity enacted in the here and now for me to grasp just how messed up of an idea it is. Had I not spent a few minutes being horrified before I saw the connection to LDS theology, I don’t know that it would have had the same effect. We’re desensitized to what we already know. LDS theology is so familiar to me, it’s hard to see it for what it is. That’s why leaving the LDS Church has been so eye-opening. The longer I’m away, the more certain things stand out to me and I can’t for the life of me believe I never noticed them or never realized they were so damn glaring.<br />
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Okay, I guess I’m going to turn this into a three-part series. The final thing I wanted to discuss takes things in a very different direction, so I might as well make it its own post. That’s not a bad thing. This three-part series will end up practically doubling the number of posts I’ve written this year. Yay!Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-89094022831753165942016-08-31T20:40:00.000-06:002016-08-31T20:40:31.029-06:00More Thoughts on Polygamy, Pt. 1As I mentioned in <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/08/sunstone-2016.html">my previous post</a>, I’ve become more interested lately in learning about polygamist groups that trace their heritage to Joseph Smith, Jr., founder of Mormonism. Over the summer, Melanie and I watched several reality TV shows about polygamy, and I can’t help but find the culture fascinating. Some of these shows are more sensationalistic than others—“reality” is a loose term when you’re talking about reality TV—but the presentation isn’t what grips me. Instead, I find myself completely captivated by the ways in which these polygamist groups mirror the culture in which I myself grew up as a member of the mainstream LDS Church. If you have no connection to the LDS Church and know little about Mormons other than their historical affiliation with polygamy, it may seem absurd that I could find the similarities between the groups that still practice polygamy and the LDS Church startling. But mainstream Mormons today are about as anti-polygamy as anyone, and the majority of them would be appalled to think their culture bears any resemblance to the “depraved” and “apostate” sects that still adhere to the doctrine of plural marriage. That’s the mentality I grew up with. But now, I continually find myself shaking my head in amazement at the similarities. It can be truly stunning.<br />
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I listed several of the similarities between mainstream LDS culture and polygamist cultures in my previous post, but I didn’t really elaborate on them. I was simply reporting some of the things I’d heard at Sunstone from former members of polygamist groups. In this post, I will elaborate on those points but also raise some new ones. I will also explain why I find lacking some of the typical responses LDS folk often given for why polygamy was ever practiced in the first place.<br />
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Let’s begin with the similarities.<br />
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<b>Similarity #1: Suffering persecution is evidence that you belong to God’s true church</b><br />
I don’t know how much actual persecution the average polygamist faces, nor the average Mormon. But Mormons are notorious for having a persecution complex. Often, they will equate anything in the world that doesn’t cohere with their values, beliefs, and/or desires as a kind of persecution. At the risk of exaggerating—though not by much—a Mormon might see the fact that the corner grocery store remains open on Sunday as a form of persecution. Less controversially, Mormons being the brunt of a joke on TV could be seen as persecution. Almost certainly, non-Mormon Utahans griping about the LDS Church’s stronghold on state politics, about the obnoxiousness of LDS neighbors, or other general complaining about the surrounding culture is regarded as persecution. Sure, most Mormons aren’t being tarred and feathered nowadays, but they are persistently mocked and ridiculed by outsiders, at least from their own perspective. And why is that? Because the LDS Church is Satan’s enemy #1. And why is <i>that</i>, you might ask? Simple: because the LDS Church is God’s true church on the face of the earth. Thus, it is the only religious institution that truly threatens Beelzebub’s plan of dragging as many souls as possible down to Hell to be his partners in misery. The Devil has a vested interest in making the LDS Church as laughable to outsiders as possible, so as to prevent converts and encourage apostasy. From what I’ve heard out of the mouths of ex-polygamists themselves, polygamists say the exact same thing about why they face persecution—because Satan is working so very hard, and so very specifically, against them. After all, why would he bother stirring up trouble for those who already belong to false churches and who are therefore already in his grasp? (What’s that? Religious groups other than Mormons and polygamists face persecution? Hush, hush, now! It’s time to move on! Go!)<br />
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<b>Similarity #2: Doubting or questioning what you’ve been taught is the result of Satan planting those thoughts in your head</b><br />
It’s more of the same logic here. Satan’s out to destroy God’s work, so of course he tries to confuse you by making you cock an eyebrow whenever a religious leader tells you something like God can make a square circle. Don’t question it! Don’t try to make sense of it! The more you linger on a doubt, the more chains Satan is able to wrap around your neck! Don’t be that guy! It’s amazing how much peace and tranquility comes from turning off your critical thinking skills!<br />
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<b>Similarity #3: When laws are passed that stand in the way of the religion’s wishes or moral dictates, Satan is to blame</b><br />
This probably counts as a subset of similarity #1, but I’ve heard it from polygamists and LDS Mormons alike. Polygamists point to the example of child labor laws that stand in the way of their building up the Kingdom of God on earth, as they are striving to do. Mormons point to things like the legalization of same-sex marriage, which stands in the way of their building up the Kingdom of God on earth, as they are striving to do. When will people learn that God does <i>not </i>want happiness for children or the gays! C’mon, already! No matter which religious group you belong to, make no mistake that when it comes to the nation’s law books, Satan is head ghost writer. <br />
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<b>Similarity #4: Ugly stories about the church, its history, or its leaders are lies concocted by those who seek to destroy God’s work</b><br />
Who are in turn inspired by Satan, of course. It’s infuriating to me when Mormons refuse to believe anything that opposes their belief system because all such things are automatically dismissed as lies. Critically evaluate my position and dismiss it. That is fine. But that’s not how it usually works. Knowing something contradicts the narrative they were raised with is enough for most Mormons to stop listening altogether. Well, I consider it a giant red flag whenever a religious institution uses its beliefs as a Litmus test for determining truth rather than the other way around. I’m sure this is a problem in many religious cultures and not just among Mormons and polygamists. Even so, I have learned that “Liar, liar, pants on fire!” is indeed a common retort for the latter two. One woman who spoke at Sunstone is a lawyer who worked on some of the legal cases connected to Warren Jeffs. She spoke of two polygamist women who were made to testify and who had to listen to the recording of Jeffs having sex with a 12-year-old girl in the FLDS temple. After refusing to answer the lawyer’s questions about it, the judge finally forced them to answer. “The God and the prophet never do wrong!” was all one of them would say. The other simply reported that she didn’t trust the audio recording one iota, considering it a fabrication of those determined to harm the prophet and the church. Sigh. Unshakeable faith is not a virtue, my friends. If your faith won’t shake even when reality hits it smack over the head, that’s not a matter of standing firm. That’s just having one hell of a stiff neck.<br />
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<b>Similarity #5: Extreme reverence for church leaders</b><br />
Maybe this one doesn’t seem so bad on the surface, but hear me out. On one episode of <i>Escaping Polygamy</i>, a woman was fleeing her FLDS community. In the midst of collecting her belongings and whatnot, she had to sneak into an FLDS school. As she darted through the school, you could see photos of Warren Jeffs hanging on the wall. Knowing who Jeffs is, this turned my stomach. These people are quite literally victims of Jeffs, and yet their buildings and homes are pockmarked with visual shrines to the man. I found myself thinking, “Shouldn’t it be paintings of Jesus on the wall? Isn’t that who they’re supposed to look to? Isn’t that who they claim to worship?” And it immediately hit me that Mormons do the exact same thing with pictures of their leaders. The last time I attended the LDS temple, I found myself disturbed by the photos of church leaders hanging in the chapel where one waits for a temple session to begin. It just didn’t seem right. And it isn’t. I guess it’s okay to have images of people you admire in your house, but in LDS culture, it’s something of a duty to have at least one photo of the prophet on prominent display in your home. Why??? Mormons rise whenever the president of the church walks into a room, hold public celebrations in honor of their leaders, swap stories about when they had the honor of touching or even being in the same room as one of these men, etc. It’s all a bit disturbing. We do this with celebrities, yes, but that’s my point—are these men celebrities? Should they be???<br />
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Ay, carumba. I don’t have time to finish this post now, and I’m not even sure if it’s structured the way I wanted it to be. I feel like it’s a rough draft at best, but with the limited time I have nowadays, I don’t really have time to second guess it. I’m officially calling it “Part 1” and hoping that “Part 2” will be something coherent whenever I get around to it. I don’t feel like this post added much of anything. Like I said, it was a rough draft with me gathering thoughts. I wasn’t sure I’d hand them over like this without reorganizing and restructuring, etc., but oh well. Sue me. Can you tell I’m ending this rather abruptly?Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-8648329567256825512016-07-31T23:48:00.000-06:002016-08-01T23:48:27.702-06:00Sunstone 2016<i>Note: I am backdating this post to yesterday, because I had written most of it by then and just never got around to publishing it. Until now. So there.</i><br />
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This weekend at the University of Utah was the Sunstone Symposium, an annual multi-day conference geared toward Mormon and Mormon-related intellectualism. The bulk of the crowd consists of liberal and/or “fringe” Mormons. There are also many ex-Mormons who retain an interest in Mormonism, and then there are those who belong to groups (or have come out of groups) that also trace their lineage, in some way or another, to Joseph Smith. (Many of these people call themselves “Mormon” but are not members of the mainstream LDS Church headquartered in Salt Lake City, UT. While I believe they have every right to use the term “Mormon,” I make a distinction here purely for convenience’s sake—because nothing says convenience quite like a lengthy parenthetical aside.)<br />
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<a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2014/08/sunstone.html">My first time attending Sunstone</a> was two years ago. I couldn’t go last year because <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/search/label/Nauvoo">I was in Nauvoo</a>, but this year afforded me another opportunity to be a part of the Sunstone extravaganza. Of course, I’ve gone through some big changes since I last attended. This year, I went as an ex-Mormon. As such, I was interested in far fewer sessions. I don’t really need to attend a session on how doubt can be a healthy thing and has its place within the LDS Church when I myself am no longer a part of the LDS Church and no longer feel a need to come to terms with how much (or how little) I doubt. But the theme of this year’s symposium was “Many Mormonisms and the Mormon Movement.” There was a conscious effort to bring a wider range of “Mormon” voices to the conference, and that resulted in many polygamous sects being represented (sometimes for good and sometimes for ill). My interest in polygamy has increased much over the last while (though I have no interest in practicing polygamy myself, I assure you), so I ended up attending only one Sunstone session that was <i>not </i>polygamy-based. The very first session I attended this year featured a panel of women who currently live in polygamist families. Edith Barlow and Elsie Blackmore are the 13th and 25th wife, respectively, of Winston Blackmore. Also on the panel were Elise Barlow, Hanna Blackmore, and Dollie Blackmore, three of Winston’s 145 biological children. (That’s not a typo. He has <i>145 </i>biological children.) They spoke highly of their experiences within a polygamous family and culture and of the joy that it brings them. They were articulate and funny. I very much appreciated and enjoyed hearing from them, and I felt nothing but good will toward them. Then, as a kind of afterthought, I remembered some of the ideas that weren’t being expressed but are pretty much guaranteed to be a part of their polygamous culture—unhealthy ideas and attitudes about different races, for example. That made me sad.<br />
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Brady Williams, of TLC’s <i>My Five Wives</i>, was also at Sunstone. (So were his wives, but they didn’t want to be on the stage, having “had enough of the spotlight,” according to Brady.) He argued in defense of “progressive polygamy,” which he deemed “feminism’s strangest bedfellow.” His family left the Apostolic United Brethren years ago and now practices polygamy for reasons that have nothing to do with religious beliefs. It is simply the structure of the family they have created together, that they love, and that they want to keep intact (as they should). Brady defends a view that is very forward-thinking, wherein a marriage system can remain closed but accommodate any variety and number of parties to that marriage: a man and five women, two men and a woman, five women and two men, three women without a man at all, etc. The key is that each party to the marriage has an equal say as to whom the marriage will include, and each party’s voice <i>must be heard</i>. That’s an oversimplified retelling of his view, but it was certainly interesting. I see no blatant logical or ethical flaws in his position, though I question how emotionally healthy it would be for at least most people to have more than one (concurrent) spouse.<br />
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Most of the sessions I attended were not friendly toward polygamy. Most presenters spoke of it as inherently damaging and problematic, with several of them being former members of polygamist groups. What fascinated me above all else was hearing these former members of fundamentalist Mormon sects describe mentalities that are oh-so-familiar to me because of my LDS background and upbringing. These are mentalities that I have long abandoned, and yet examining them within the framework of systems that I believe are clearly morally corrupt and/or psychologically unhealthy made it all the more obvious to me that these ways of thinking—no matter who adopts them—are just plain batshit crazy (to use the phrase I most want to use, if I may be so frank). Here is just a sample of the kinds of thinking I heard: Persecution is “proof” that you belong to the one true church, because that’s who Satan would want to target and hinder the progression of. If you find yourself seriously doubting or questioning what a church leader has taught or something that you read in the scriptures, Satan is putting those thoughts into your head. Because of his grasp on the world at large, Satan is also the author and perpetrator of laws that go against God’s will, prevent the building up of God’s kingdom on the earth, and otherwise corrupt society—which, in this case, includes anti-polygamy laws and child labor laws. Stories that reflect poorly on church leadership (past or present) are lies made up by those outside of the church who are intent on destroying it and thwarting God’s work. <i>These are shaming, paranoia-inducing, critical-thinking-discouraging, coercive, manipulative, and otherwise controlling mentalities</i>—and every single one of them is very familiar to me as someone who was born and raised in the LDS Church.<br />
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On Sunday, Community of Christ held “Sunstone Sunday” to finish off the Sunstone weekend. Community of Christ is one of the sponsors of the Sunstone Symposium, so a special announcement is made inviting people to attend our church services the day after the official symposium concludes. We had a ton of visitors, which was cool. I met some new people, and they all seemed great. Community of Christ seems to attract the cream of the crop, I have to admit. But not all of the guests were new to Community of Christ. Lachlan Mackay, my boss during my time in Nauvoo, came out for Sunstone and taught our Sunday School class. He explored the question of how it is that, given Mormonism’s militant beginnings, the RLDS Church / Community of Christ could nevertheless develop into a “peace church.” Then, during the worship service, Toronto-based John Hamer delivered the sermon. Hamer’s theme, taken from Luke 12:13–21, was “Be Rich Toward God.” It was an awesome service all around.<br />
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And now for some photos from my Sunstone adventures:<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">This is probably my very favorite souvenir of Sunstone 2016, the work of a gentleman by the name of Matt Page. (He also dressed as Brigham Young and was a popular photo-op among Sunstone guests.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Many people aren't aware that Brigham Young's son regularly performed in drag. This is a cardboard cutout of a photo of him in character. And no, this isn't a joke.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Lately, I've been thinking of taking up that quaint old habit of reading books again. I got this from the discount / clearance / bargain bin table at Sunstone and feel eager to read it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Brady Williams and his wives are bookended by Mica McGriggs (moderator) and Lindsay Hansen Park (one of the top people at Sunstone but also famous for her <i><a href="http://www.yearofpolygamy.com/">Year of Polygamy</a></i> podcast series, which is well worth listening to ... though it might make you both sick and sad).</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">A could-be-better photo of D. Michael Quinn and John Nielsen, who presented at a session entitled "Who Holds the Keys?: FLDS Perspectives on Authority." Did you know that, in the FLDS community, the Celestial Kingdom is divided into three levels reserved for those whose marriages consist of 3 wives, 5 wives, and 7+ wives, respectively? That was new to me! Apparently, it all ties back to Freemasonry and Brigham Young, like so much of polygamist culture and belief does (though not the actual polygamy part, funny enough).</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Being goofy in my souvenir <i><a href="http://infantsonthrones.com/">Infants on Thrones</a></i> t-shirt. Now that I've left the LDS Church behind, <i>Infants on Thrones</i> is the only podcast I listen to with great regularity. It's irreverent, often hilarious, and features among its pantheon of hosts none other than the aforementioned John Hamer.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Lach Mackay and I pose with Emma Smith and Joseph Smith III at the Salt Lake City Community of Christ on Sunday, July 31st. I got somewhere between zero and two photos with Lach while working in Nauvoo, but I'm not sure any of them were just the two of us. This was as close as I could get. For whatever reason, cardboard cut-outs are all the rage lately.</span></div>
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<br />Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-89221191228054603962016-06-14T17:37:00.003-06:002016-06-14T19:25:44.030-06:00Potpourri No. 42I’m alive. Here’s an update.<br />
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<b><i>Work Life</i></b><br />
My job continues to go really well. They seem really pleased with me. I receive frequent praise. My supervisor called me into a meeting room today and told me she’s already trying to get me to be a salaried employee, complete with a pay raise. They don’t normally do this so quickly, but she thinks I’ve been doing an amazing job and, according to her, they don’t ever want to lose me. I like the job very much because I work largely independently and get to spend a good chunk of my day listening to music. Most of the time, it’s a somewhat busy but not-too-stressful job. A nice combo. I often think about how happy I am with it, and I don’t think you could ask for much more than that.<br />
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<b><i>Personal Life</i></b><br />
One of the best things to happen in the last month is that I’ve started taking guitar lessons again. As I’m sure I’ve said on this very blog, probably numerous times, one of my biggest fears is that I will look back on my life and curse myself for not doing a whole lot more with music. I’ve taken guitar lessons, in spurts, a few times in my life, but I’m a much more disciplined guy nowadays. I think this time around, it really has a chance to pay off. And so far, it is. I’m playing a lot more music, and in turn, I’m writing more music. I think having a job where I’ve been able to listen to so much music has helped inspire me. When I’m listening to really good music, I find myself thinking I want to spend as much of my free time as possible writing and playing.<br />
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<b><i>Home Life</i></b><br />
I guess this is a subset of personal life, but whatever. Melanie and I continue to love our home, but the first big problems have already appeared. When it rains, we have issues with flooding. One of our downstairs bedrooms gets water soaking up into the carpet. Apparently, there’s a crack in the foundation and the water in the ground seeps in. It’s not coming in so fast that it’s hugely problematic, but it’s certainly a big nuisance. And it stinks up the carpet, and it makes a good chunk of that room unusable because you don’t know what will get ruined. And then we have to run a high-powered fan for days at a time to dry things out, which is noisy and likely racks up the electric bill. Our garage is also quite bad if it rains a lot. It turns into a lake inside. Many books have already fallen victim to it. We can’t reliably store anything in the garage, apparently, because water will get to it eventually. My books were in boxes, but the bottom of the box gets all soggy and then the water starts to soak up into the book. There was only one book that was in such terrible condition, I threw it away. But several have become warped. And that depresses me. Books are one of my treasured possessions.<br />
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<i><b>Family Life</b></i><br />
Family life is going really, really well lately. We went through a very rough phase with Peter, where he was pretty much abusive to us, no matter what was going on. It didn’t matter how you treated him, he would treat you like garbage. It was extremely depressing, and I’m not using that term lightly. But that situation has improved dramatically over the last two or three months, and it’s wonderful. I also love that Melanie and I are in a situation where we can date once in a while. Just last Saturday, we went out to lunch and two movies at Broadway, a theater that specializes in independent film. It was a splurge, but it was great. I continue to be crazy about that girl, and I don’t get sick of spending time with her. In fact, it’s much harder for me to enjoy work now that Melanie and the boys are on summer vacation. I feel like I’m missing out, and that’s really sad. But I think they’re enjoying the summer thus far. They’ve kept busy playing around. As they should. Melanie, unfortunately, has to have surgery in a couple of weeks. If everything goes well, it will be an outpatient surgery and shouldn’t be too debilitating. But that doesn’t mean it will be fun or that she’ll be wanting to (or allowed to) go out and play the next day. I just hope she recuperates quickly enough to enjoy the latter half of her summer break.<br />
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In sum, life continues to get more and more wonderful. And that’s pretty damn cool. I guess that’s all I’ll say for now.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-82492693945742194742016-04-09T23:38:00.000-06:002016-04-09T23:38:17.162-06:002015 in Review: Music<i>This is the fifth in a series looking back on 2015. Other entries will include <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-books.html">books</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-movies.html">movies</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-food.html">food</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-television.html">television</a>, and more.</i><br />
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The last time I posted an entry from my 2015 year-in-review series, it was January 30th. At the time, I felt sheepish about the fact that January was coming to an end and I was still recapping the previous year. Then I practically stopped writing blog entries at all. Here it is, touching on mid-April, and I still haven’t completed my year-in-review of 2015. It seems completely absurd to start it up again at this point, I’m sure, and yet I’m going to do so. I had stuff I wanted to say about my musical year of 2015, and I’m going to embrace the whole “better late than never” philosophy when it comes to this. So here we go…<br />
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For me, the first standout album in 2015, although an album much older than that, is Men Without Hats’ 1987 release, <i>Pop Goes the World</i>. I got this album from the library in early February and listened to it almost non-stop for weeks. I found it unbelievably catchy, and it coincided with my coming to a point of clarity in my spiritual journey that also left me feeling giddy. The album served as a perfectly upbeat companion to a time in my life when things were changing, when anything seemed possible, and when I was deliriously happy—which is the precise term I used in <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/02/happy-happy-joy-joy.html">a blog entry</a> I wrote at that time, wherein I give credit to both <i>Pop Goes the World</i> and my religious revolution. I now think of <i>Pop Goes the World</i> as my conversion album. Many of you will be familiar with the title track “Pop Goes the World,” a decent hit for Men Without Hats back when it came out. If you’re like I was just 14 months ago, you’ve never heard the rest of the album. But, man, it’s fun. Although there are several songs that are certifiable earworms, I’ve chosen to share “Moonbeam” below. Apparently, it was also released as a single in ‘87, but I have no recollection of it. Does it ring a bell with any of my readers? I apologize that the video is of such terrible quality, both visually and creatively speaking. But the audio isn’t bad, and that’s what we’re going for here.<br />
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I discovered The John Butler Trio in 2015 thanks to a YouTube video shared on Facebook. I admit, I haven’t listened much to this band since, but I was blown away by the solo acoustic performance of “Ocean,” which I will post below. It’s impressive enough to be worth sharing, no matter how much (or how little) the band has otherwise taken root in my mind. The guitar-playing is mind-blowing.<br />
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One of my favorite folksy artists is Canadian singer-songwriter Hayden. Hayden released <i>Hey Love</i> in late March 2015, and while it may be one of the least memorable of his albums, it’s still good. Here’s the video for “Troubled Times”:<br />
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One of my favorite punk bands, Stiff Little Fingers, released a new album in 2015 titled <i>No Going Back</i>. Their first three albums, released between 1979 and 1981, will forever remain their best, but they’re in pretty good form considering. I need to spend more time with <i>No Going Back</i>, but here’s a sample for you: “Throwing It All Away,” a rather radio-friendly none-too-raucous ditty if I do say so myself.<br />
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Barenaked Ladies also reappeared on the scene in 2015 with the release of <i>Silverball</i>, just in time to spend some time on our car CD player as we drove to Illinois to spend seven weeks living in Nauvoo. <i>Silverball </i>is a marked improvement over 2013’s <i>Grinning Streak</i>, but still near the bottom of the band’s extensive catalog. Multi-instrumentalist Kevin Hearn continues to be one of the group’s greatest assets, if not an under-utilized songwriter. “Tired of Fighting with You” features Hearn’s classic surreal lullaby sound and quirkily poetic lyrics. This track doesn’t showcase the more energetic pop-rock tone that dominates the rest of the album, but it’s a good song.<br />
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1980s New Wave superstars Duran Duran are still going strong, having released <i>Paper Gods </i>in September. Perhaps only one album will eclipse <i>Paper Gods</i> as the album that featured more heavily into my life during 2015—and no, I’m not referring to <i>Pop Goes the World</i>. (Oh, the suspense!) Creegan has been an incredibly fun part of my music listening over the last year. He is an avid music listener, and he picks out his favorites from every CD he hears and demands that they be replayed over and over again. The first three tracks of <i>Paper Gods</i>—titled “Paper Gods,” “Last Night in the City” and “You Kill Me With Silence,” respectively—were all exceptionally big hits with Creegan, who loved the album in its entirety. But I’m actually going to share the fourth track from the album, “Pressure Off.” Why? Because it’s catchy as hell. What other reason do you need?<br />
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One of the best releases in 2015, in my opinion, was Ben Folds’ <i>So There</i>. The album concludes with over 20 minutes of concerto music, spanning three tracks. Preceding that are eight piano-heavy pop tunes, in classic Ben Folds form but with more orchestration than he’s ever done before. My favorite is the opening track, “Capable of Anything,” which I’ll share here:<br />
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One musician I continually find myself surprised to enjoy as much as I do is Joe Satriani, guitarist extraordinaire who specializes in instrumental rock. I found his 2015 release, <i>Shockwave Supernova</i>, thoroughly enjoyable. The final track is one of my favorites on the album, the slower, aptly-named “Goodbye Supernova.” I really like the bass in this song. Not that it’s impressive, it just sounds really good to me. I think it reminds me of something else, which might not be what Satriani wants to hear, but regardless, there is a nostalgic quality to this tune that pulls me in and makes me feel like closing my eyes and reflecting. Here it is:<br />
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I bought Shockwave Supernova as a birthday present to myself along with a few other albums. I rounded out my Collective Soul collection by nabbing both 2008’s <i>Afterwords</i>, which I had previously neglected, and their new 2015 release, <i>See What You Started by Continuing</i>. Collective Soul is one of those bands that I really enjoyed in the 1990s and then stopped paying much attention to after a couple of their albums were merely so-so. After nearly a decade-and-a-half of pretty much ignoring them, I came by a really cheap copy of their 2009 self-titled album and gave it a listen. I quite liked it. I can understand someone arguing that many of their songs sound quite a bit alike, but such a complaint can be lobbied against many a good band. All I know is, the last few Collective Soul albums have been very enjoyable, and I’m glad to have them back in rotation. Below are the videos for “Hollywood” from <i>Afterwords </i>and “AYTA” from <i>See What You Started by Continuing</i>.<br />
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One of my absolute favorite album discoveries of 2015 was one of my birthday CDs, <i>White Hot Peach</i> by Primitive Radio Gods. Choosing one song to showcase from this album is incredibly hard. It’s so damn good. I’m not sure the audio quality is as good in the following video as I wish it were, but the song is awesome. Please enjoy “Fading Out.” After you listen to this, can you honestly say you don’t want to listen to it about 100 more times before doing anything else?<br />
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It was late October, or maybe November, when a friend of mine called me up and invited me to go with him to see Shakey Graves in concert. I’d never heard of Shakey Graves, but I went for it and had a very good time. I was amused that, of all the concerts I’ve ever been to, this country-tinged, electrified, singer-songwriter type gave the most rock star performance of any artist I’ve ever seen live. Brassieres thrown onstage? I’d never seen it before, but it happened for Shakey Graves. He had a certain boyish charm and energy about him that kept the crowd enthralled, myself included. He wasn’t shredding up the guitar like you might expect of a heavy metal musician, but man, could he fingerpick the hell out of it. I’ve decided that a video of a live performance is more fitting, since that’s how I experienced Shakey Graves. In this video, he looks very much like he did when I saw him at The Depot in downtown Salt Lake City: black baseball cap, plain white t-shirt, and a thick but short beard. Enjoy this dual performance of “If Not For You” and “The Perfect Parts,” both from the 2014 album <i>And the War Came</i>.<br />
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And now for the absolute biggest album of 2015, as far as my family is concerned: <i>Blurryface </i>by Twenty One Pilots. We got this album from the library, and even more so than with Duran Duran’s <i>Paper Gods</i>, my kids could not get enough of it. They knew a couple of songs from the radio—“Tear in My Heart” and “Stressed Out”—but they quickly fell in love with pretty much every track on the CD. I tell you, watching Creegan cock an attitude and sing along with “Stressed Out” is pretty darn entertaining, but even I found myself enjoying the crap out of this album from a purely musical standpoint. For all the many hours of continuous airplay that it received in our car, I never got sick of it. I still don’t feel sick of it, even though it still gets regular airplay. (Santa was wise enough to give us our own official copy for Christmas.) Twenty One Pilots are sometimes classified as an “alternative hip hop” duo. If you know me, you know hip hop is pretty far from my style, but I guess the “alternative” part is doing enough work to keep my ears perked up and happy. Yes, there’s a fair amount of rapping, but there is also plenty of melodic singing and even some edgy screaming now and again. Musically and lyrically, these guys are hella talented. Spoiler alert for when I review 2016, but I’ve since listened to another couple of albums by Twenty One Pilots and they are relentlessly amazing. Each of the three albums I’ve listened to had me instantaneously hooked. Twenty One Pilots are one of the best discoveries I’ve made in the last few years, without question.<br />
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I’ll be sharing a few videos to orient you to Twenty One Pilots. The first video is the official video for “Stressed Out,” which is on the radio almost constantly, it seems. On the off chance you haven’t heard it, now you can. The next video is one of Creegan listening to “Stressed Out” while in the car. I discreetly filmed him with my cell phone so he wouldn’t know what I was doing and stop behaving however he was. Sadly, despite seriously belting his heart out numerous times up to this point, it seems my filming had the cosmic effect of cramping his style. In the video, he starts off singing in a silly, non-serious way (not as he had been up to that point), makes an observation about the lyrics, mimics a drumbeat, and eventually just lip-syncs and dances a bit. It’s still cute, and you still get a feel for how he sometimes acts when he’s singing along, but it’s not what I hoped it would be. To make matters worse, the picture goes blurry for most of the video. But it’s the best I can offer. The third and final video below is merely the audio track of my favorite song on the album, “Hometown.” It’s amazing.<br />
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The end!Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-58184029601249411512016-03-10T18:45:00.000-07:002019-05-11T21:56:39.830-06:00Everything Has Changed … A Little Bit More<a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/02/everything-has-changed.html">Last time</a>, I wrote about moving into a new place, starting a new job, and being ordained (along with Melanie) to the priesthood in Community of Christ. I shared some photos of all but the new job. Almost three weeks have passed since then, and now I have some new photos that show how things have progressed in respect both to our home and to our new church responsibilities. If you haven’t seen <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/02/everything-has-changed.html">my previous post</a>, you won’t get the full effect … and the effect will BLOW YOUR MIND! Well, not really. But it adds a little bit to the experience.<br />
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Let’s begin with the new home. About a month into living here, Melanie and I love it. I really love it. I don’t know what to say about it that I haven’t said before, but I’m incredibly happy here. It feels good. In my previous post, I shared a photo of Melanie sitting in a sparsely filled living room. But then we got our federal tax return—an incredibly nice one—and went on a shopping spree, which included a new couch, a rug, a new TV, and a TV stand. Yes, we’re playing grown up, and it’s mighty fun. Here’s how our living room looks now (which still isn’t finished, for the record):<br />
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Since being ordained, Melanie and I have had the opportunity to administer communion to our congregation. This is something I’ve looked forward to since we received our calls to the priesthood. We got to the church early on March 7th, prepared the bread and grape juice, and during the worship service, blessed them and served them to those in attendance. Melanie went first, blessing the water. I got teary-eyed during her prayer. After we had served the congregation bread, I blessed the grape juice. I tell you, as a former Mormon, it’s a lot more stressful to serve communion at Community of Christ. For one thing, you don’t just hand the tray to the person sitting on the edge of the pew and let everybody pass it down the row. In Community of Christ, the priesthood serves communion to each and every member of the congregation who partakes of it. That means that, this most recent Sunday, I was holding the tray the entire time I served. That makes it more stressful in and of itself, but add to that the fact that you’ve got a tray full of little cups of grape juice—dark purple grape juice that could stain anything it touches—and the stress of working up and down the rows escalates. It was a neat experience, but a much weightier one, no doubt. I wish I had been able to pay more attention to what Melanie was doing, because that would’ve been neat. I didn’t really see her serve anyone because I was too busy tending to my own serving. I especially wish I could’ve seen her serve it to our kids, which she said was a really neat experience for her. Shucks. Anyway, a good friend snapped a photo with her cell phone while Melanie and I were serving grape juice to each other. It’s from a distance, but I appreciate that we have a photo of our first time serving communion together, and the first time in Community of Christ. Here it is:<br />
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<br />Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-89216561152936517922016-02-21T21:58:00.000-07:002019-05-11T21:56:40.399-06:00Everything Has ChangedI’m not the same man I was the last time I posted on my blog. Or, at least, there are many things about me that have changed. I’ve started a job, I’ve moved, and I’ve been ordained to the priesthood at church. It’s a busy and exciting time, with an emphasis on “busy.” It’s so busy, in fact, that I’m hardly going to say anything about all of these wonderful and exciting developments. But I’ll say a little bit about each. That’ll have to do.<br />
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When I received and accepted a job offer, Melanie and I made finding a new home a priority. Living with Melanie’s parents for a year and a half was a necessity, and it had a lot of perks. But nothing compares to having your own space. And so, we began some serious house hunting. We had kept our eyes peeled for rental homes before I received the job offer, but once we knew I had a guaranteed income, we were empowered to act on any promising homes we found. When it came down to it, we were strongly considering two different rental properties: a townhome and a duplex. Originally, we had avoided looking into townhomes and duplexes because we didn’t want to have neighbors that were technically living in the same physical building. But there are some significant perks to these types of rental properties that weren’t typically available when renting a house, such as having your landlord take care of landscaping responsibilities and certain utilities, or having a much smaller security deposit. The townhome we fancied was in a pretty good location, not too far from where we had been living. The townhome community itself was built in 2007 and so was quite new, meaning it looked and felt rather fancy inside. It had some nice amenities, such as a clubhouse and swimming pool, and the guy who showed us the property seemed ready and willing to rent it to us. It was very tempting. But we were also considering a very large duplex, a duplex so large that the term “duplex” seems misleading. The duplex seems like a townhome of its own, with three levels, four bedrooms, an attached two-car garage, and approximately 2,000 square feet of living space. It’s an older property—built in 1970—but it’s been updated inside. And did I mention the space? The rooms are huge. It was also about $200 less per month than the townhome and even closer to Melanie’s and my works. And so, after giving it much thought, we decided to apply for the duplex. And we got it. And we’re living here now. And it’s absolutely wonderful. I love the location, I love the space. I’m ecstatic about these things. Here’s the first photo taken in our new home, with things still looking rather sparse:<br />
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When it comes to my new job, I started on Tuesday. The first day was new hire orientation, which included being taken out to a very nice lunch. That was cool. I then spent the next two days getting the impression they weren’t 100% sure what to do with me just yet. I think there weren’t any new projects for them to start me on, so they were kind of killing time. I was told to do things like investigate the company website and learn more about it, to set up a LinkedIn account, and other activities that probably aren’t the most pressing things one could do when on the clock. But by late Thursday afternoon, I was actually doing some real work, and I’m feeling incredibly optimistic. I already was optimistic, but I just think I’ve fallen into something really great here. The team is terrific, the scheduling and dress code are both very relaxed, the pay is good—I don’t know that I could realistically be happier working a “real” job.<br />
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And then there was today. Melanie and I have been preparing for ordination into the priesthood of Community of Christ for months now. Today, we were both officially ordained. It was a beautiful service with lots of love and support from friends and family. Melanie’s brother Brent even came down from Seattle to share the moment with us, which was pretty awesome. I was the first to be ordained during the worship service, being ordained to the office of elder. It was cool because the second I was done being ordained, I was able to hop up and assist in Melanie’s ordination to the office of priest. Serendipitously—or perhaps it was divine intervention—Melanie and I were extremely color-coordinated not only with each other, but with Jenn, one of the people ordaining us. None of this was planned or known about ahead of time. Melanie and I were both dressed before we saw that we matched. Here are some photos a friend of ours took of the ordinations. You’ll see what I mean.<br />
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Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-25301033800882490532016-02-08T21:30:00.000-07:002016-02-08T21:30:01.340-07:00We Interrupt This Program…I’ve yet to finish my review of 2015, as if anybody notices or cares. Life has been so hectic lately, I just haven’t found the time to write. About anything. And a lot has been going on. Most of it is very good news, so I’m going to jump in and share some of the basics.<br />
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The biggest news is that I am starting a new job on February 16th. I am going to be an “email specialist,” which is something I’d never heard of but which, so far as I understand it, involves being on the more technical side of creating emails. In my particular case, it is my HTML skills—which are minimal—that will be put to use. Getting this job is a big deal for many reasons. One reason is that I haven’t worked in almost 10 years. Okay, that’s not quite true. I worked aplenty as a graduate student, and not just as a student but as an instructor of college-level courses and as a TA. I got paid for that, so it was all legitimate work. But it wasn’t traditional work. I also had a brief stint as a tour guide in Nauvoo during the summer, but that didn’t feel so much like getting a job as participating in some neat opportunity that happened to include an income. My email specialist job will be the first “normal” type of job I’ve had since I was a customer service representative in the summer of 2006. And I’m stoked, believe it or not. I’ve applied and been interviewed for a few positions over the last couple of months, and this job has been the most appealing by far. The rapport I felt with the people who interviewed me was off the charts compared to any of the other interviews I’ve had. The job sounds the most intriguing of any job I’ve applied for. The pay is better than any other job I’ve applied for. As an added bonus, I have a couple of good friends who work at the same company (in other departments). It’s all shaping up to be a very positive experience. I really believe that. I’m hopeful, and even expectant, that this could be a company I’ll be happy to be with for an indefinite period of time, and maybe for decades. Crazy, right?<br />
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One of the biggest perks of getting this job is that Melanie and I can finally afford to move out of her parents’ house. I’m sure her parents will appreciate it as much as we will. I’ve actually been amazed at how positive an experience it’s been to live here. Overall, I haven’t minded it that much at all. But it will certainly be good to re-embrace adulthood and live independently. Melanie and I have spent the last several days doing quite a bit of house hunting. It’s already exhausting. And heartbreaking. We’ve found a few really promising homes in fantastic locations, only to learn they are already taken by the time we call on them. You can get a lot of bang for your buck if you’re willing to move clear to the other side of the valley and live in what feels like the middle of nowhere. We’ve driven to see some of the homes out that way, but we only get about halfway to them before our faces take on sour expressions and our hearts start telling us there’s no way we can really imagine ourselves living that far away from what feels like our world. I don’t want to settle for something that is merely tolerable, just to move out. I believe if we’re patient we will get something we are extremely pleased with. But it’s hard when you’re chomping at the bit. Perhaps it will cloud our judgment. I don’t know. I’ve got a couple of decent leads that we’ll be acting on, but we’ll see.<br />
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I also have good news when it comes to my health. After two months of near-constant illness, I am feeling pretty darn close to normal. To recap, I had strep during the second week of December, was bitten by a mystery bug the following week, came down with bronchitis the next week, and then spent all of January bouncing up and down with colds, sore throats, and even the stomach flu. Even when I felt relatively decent, my breathing was never okay during this time. Often when I’d breathe out, it would sound like coffee percolating. I had a wheeze and shortness of breath. I felt very asthmatic, or how I assumed most asthmatics must feel. I’d never been diagnosed with asthma, so I wasn’t sure. On top of all of this, a white cyst had appeared on my left tonsil and had remained for weeks. That was peculiar. And so, I finally returned to a doctor (at an urgent care facility) over this most recent weekend. They tested my breathing, gave me a breathing treatment they usually give to asthmatics, then re-tested my breathing and found that I had nearly doubled my lung capacity. (I think I just didn’t do the first breathing test very well because I didn’t know exactly what I was doing. But anyway.) They x-rayed my lungs to check for pneumonia, which came back negative. But, due to all of my symptoms, they gave me prescriptions for an inhaler, an antibiotic, and a steroid. Within hours of taking my first antibiotic and steroid, I felt immensely better. My breathing feels normal, and I haven’t wheezed or percolated since. However, the urgent care doctor said he couldn’t really say anything about the cyst on my tonsil. He told me to go to an ear, throat, and nose specialist. I did that this morning. Apparently, all signs point to it being no big deal. I’m just supposed to ignore it, unless something crazy happens like it starts growing or hurting. The doctor said it will likely fall off at some point, but that it’s likely benign. And that gives me peace of mind. I wasn’t too worried about it, but with a new job on the horizon, I didn’t want to find out I need to have my tonsils removed or start chemotherapy or something crazy. So, I’m pretty thrilled.<br />
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So, that’s where life is at today. We’re on the cusp of significant changes, and it’s mostly exhilarating, so I’m in pretty good spirits.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-60454091540529676652016-01-30T18:52:00.001-07:002016-01-30T18:52:10.565-07:002015 in Review: Television<div class="MsoNormal">
<i>This is the fourth in a series looking back on 2015. Other entries will include <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-books.html">books</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-movies.html">movies</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-food.html">food</a>, music, and more.</i><br />
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As I headed into 2015, I naively thought it unlikely that I would be exposed to very many new television shows over the course of the year. I had my reasons. One, like many people nowadays, I don’t watch any TV at its regularly scheduled time. I stream everything, or binge watch on DVD. Thus, it is incredibly easy for me to pick and choose what I watch. Two, I thought I already knew of enough shows to keep me busy and entertained throughout the year without adding to the list. But despite all of this, I ended up trying no less than 16 new (to me) TV shows during 2015, several of which I plan to continue watching with regularity—which probably means binge watching a new season every year or so.</div>
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Not every TV show I tried was a success. Melanie and I watched one episode of <b><i>Difficult People</i></b>, a Hulu original series starring Julie Klausner and Billy Eichner as two cynical comedians struggling to hit the big time in New York City. I was originally drawn to the show because I enjoyed Eichner in his relatively brief stint on <i>Parks & Recreation</i> and because so many top-notch comedians were slated to make guest appearances, from Fred Armisen to Kate McKinnon to Seth Meyers. And maybe the show is good if you stick with it for a while. I wouldn’t know. I watched one episode and was so annoyed that I’ve tried to avoid so much as thinking about it ever since. I just don’t find myself entertained by characters who are total jerks and absolutely full of themselves, which is basically what the plot of <i>Difficult People </i>is. No thank you.</div>
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I also wasn’t wooed by the rather popular (and well-reviewed) <i><b>Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee</b></i>. I guess <i>CCGC</i> (as I’ll call it) doesn’t rightfully belong on this list, since it technically isn’t a TV show. It’s a “web series.” Still, in our day and age, what difference does it make? The setup of <i>CCGC</i> is rather simple. Jerry Seinfeld spends the first few minutes of each episode showing off a classic car, then he goes in that car to pick up a famous comedian and go get some coffee. The comedians toss around some witty banter and observations, and that’s that. And really, that should be enough, if the comedians are likeable enough. But from what I’ve seen, comedians who aren’t performing aren’t often that likeable. It’s clear from the select handful of episodes I’ve seen that Jerry and his caffeine-imbibing companions greatly enjoy each other’s company, but playing voyeur to their outings isn’t as amazing as it sounds. There is a certain degree of pretentiousness that permeates every episode, and I just don’t care for it. I’ve found the show surprisingly boring, even when the guest comedian is someone I’m quite fond of.</div>
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There have been some wins throughout the year, however. Netflix has hit a home run with <i><b>Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt</b></i>. Co-created by Tina Fey, <i>UKS </i>stars Ellie Kemper as Kimmy, a woman who has recently joined the real world after living for 15 years in a type of underground bomb shelter as part of a polygamous-like cult. As you can imagine, hilarity ensues. Kemper is perfect in the title role, a painfully naïve but resolutely chipper gal who finds herself living in New York City of all places. If that doesn’t sound gripping enough, <i>UKS</i>’s über-catchy theme song is bound to leave you hooked. Singing chirpily: <i>dammit!</i></div>
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If drama’s your preferred genre of entertainment, another excellent show can be found via Netflix competitor Amazon: <i><b>Transparent</b></i>. <i>Transparent </i>stars Jeffrey Tambor as Morton / Maura Pfefferman, a sixty-something (seventy-something?) retired college professor who finally reveals to her family that she is transgender. This sends Maura’s three adult children—each of whom already struggles with a fair amount of dysfunction—reeling, some more than others. As a viewer, I’m happy to see Tambor in a role that commands some respect. I was quite a fan of <i>Arrested Development</i>, but Tambor was always my least favorite component of that show. I didn’t like his character—not that you were supposed to—and I rarely found him funny. Despite <i>Transparent</i>’s serious themes and very adult nature, I have found Tambor to be more likeable and funny here than in his previous show. </div>
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AMC’s <i><b>Better Call Saul</b></i> is another winner. Bob Odenkirk and the character of Saul Goodman gave me every reason to believe <i>Better Call Saul </i>would be a success, but spin-offs don’t have the highest track record and <i>Better Call Saul</i>’s parent show (<i>Breaking Bad</i>)<i> </i>is so iconic—I would call it the best show in all of television history—that screwing it up might seem the only genuine possibility. Fortunately, show creator Vince Gilligan (along with co-creator Peter Gould) has given this prequel enough chronological distance from <i>Breaking Bad</i> that viewers will find themselves genuinely intrigued as to how the two shows ultimately intertwine. You see, when <i>Better Call Saul </i>begins, Saul Goodman doesn’t yet exist. Instead, he is Jimmy McGill, a reformed con-man working as a lawyer and, it would seem, sincerely trying to do his best. Fans of <i>Breaking Bad </i>know McGill’s shady nature will re-emerge as McGill transforms into Saul, but how? And when? And why? I can’t wait to find out.</div>
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<i><b>The Affair</b> </i>is a drama/mystery that airs on Showtime. To say the show is about a love affair between married writer Noah Solloway (Dominic West) and Montauk waitress Alison Lockhart (Ruth Wilson) is to grossly oversimplify. It would spoil things if I said too much, but I will point out that one fascinating feature of the show is that each episode is divided into two parts, with each part representing a different person’s point of view. The subtle (and sometimes not so subtle) differences in perspective draw the viewer more fully into the mysteries that unfold. It’s a worthwhile show.</div>
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Showtime is also responsible for <i><b>Penn & Teller: Bullshit!</b></i>, a series that originally ran from 2003–2010. I saw my first couple of episodes of this show in December, but I have since watched nearly the first two seasons via Amazon. As Penn & Teller—well, Penn, since he’s the only one who ever talks—explain in the first episode, <i>Bullshit!</i> is the famous magicians’ attempt to follow in the footsteps of Harry Houdini, who devoted much of his later life to exposing frauds whom he saw as preying on the vulnerability of others—psychics, mediums, clairvoyants, and the like. While Penn & Teller definitely address things like ESP, talking to the dead, and Ouija boards, they also come down hard on things like bottled water, the funeral industry, and health nuts. While the show is unabashedly biased, the evidence seems fairly and reasonably articulated, such that I have been swayed on more than one issue. Case in point: I’m not so sure I can support recycling anymore. (<i>What!?</i> Yup! Go watch that episode and then get back to me!) <i>Bullshit!</i> is laced with profanity, but it’s often as hilarious as it is informative. I wish more people would watch shows like this.</div>
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Network TV was not without its charms in 2015. I quite enjoyed the first season of Fox’s <i><b>The Last Man on Earth</b></i>. Will Forte stars as Phil Miller, a man who finds himself all alone after a deadly virus wipes out all the rest of humanity. Or almost all the rest. By the end of episode one, after years of searching and leaving notes spray painted on highway billboards, Phil discovers he is not alone. The show is a kind of post-apocalyptic <i>Gilligan’s Island</i>, and with Forte in the lead and Kirsten Schaal soon at his side, it’s no surprise it’s one of the better sitcoms to hit the network airwaves over the last few years. That being said, the second season wasn’t nearly as funny as the first and it’s hard to see how the show will keep its momentum for very long. I’m keeping my fingers crossed they can somehow make it work, but I’d be lying if I said I was entirely optimistic.</div>
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More recently, Fox gave us <i><b>The Grinder</b></i>, a sitcom starring Rob Lowe and Fred Savage as brothers turned partners-in-law. Sort of. Lowe plays Dean Sanderson, Jr., a famous actor who played an attorney in a wildly popular and long-running TV series (also called <i>The Grinder</i>) which has recently come to an end. Savage plays Stewart Sanderson, an actual attorney. Naturally, once Dean finds himself out of work, he believes his television credentials make him a perfect asset for brother Stewart’s law firm and, as much as Stewart resists it, continually imposes himself on the cases Stewart is handling. It’s a pretty funny premise, and there’s something perfect in the pairing of Lowe and Savage. Each plays his character well—Lowe as the blissfully naïve and outlandishly overconfident superstar, Savage as the disgruntled and serious family man who is ever stuck in his older brother’s shadow. The pilot episode showed great promise, but sadly, the show has quickly become formulaic and I’m not sure it has what it takes to last. It’s kind of a one-joke show. It’s a good joke, mind you, but … yeah. </div>
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I’m on the fence about <i><b>Superstore</b></i>, a 2015 latecomer from NBC. It’s about a group of employees who work at a Walmart-type store. It doesn’t sound like much. It’s a kind of ensemble comedy. I don’t even know what to say about it. Something right is happening with it—it has some pretty good laughs—but there is a pervasive sense of mediocrity that somehow underlies the whole thing. It feels destined to be incredibly short-lived and remembered by no one. I know I’m speaking vaguely, but I find it hard to articulate my impressions of this one. There’s a spark in there somewhere, something I wish could survive and be refined. But I don’t think it will.</div>
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I guess I should mention <i><b>Inside Amy Schumer</b></i>. Amy Schumer has become something of a hot commodity in the world of comedy lately. I hear a lot of people sing her praises, but I’m not completely sold on her. She can be very funny, but she also finds herself too funny, and that’s unappealing in a comedian. Her sense of humor is also a bit too juvenile for me a lot of the time. I should clarify what I mean, because otherwise those who know me well will take me as a hypocrite. For me, something is juvenile not just because it is sexually or scatologically explicit. I can be as raunchy and boundary-pushing in my humor as anyone, though not everyone gets to know that side of me. But I find it offensive and annoying when people act like something is funny <i>merely </i>because it is profane, or sexualized, or scatological. And, in my opinion, Amy Schumer falls too often into that latter camp. It just seems cheap and lame. Anyway, if you’re wondering what <i>Inside Amy Schumer</i> itself is, it’s sketch comedy. It’s not the kind filmed in front of a live audience—think <i>Portlandia</i> rather than <i>Saturday Night Live</i>—but each episode also contains snippets of Schumer doing standup and moments where she interviews real people on the street (usually about sex). If you’re not afraid of hard-R comedy, you will likely laugh aplenty while watching the show. But even I find myself offended—on behalf of good comedy, if nothing else—at least some of the time.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-83476916995131578312016-01-15T11:56:00.000-07:002016-01-30T18:53:22.157-07:002015 in Review: Food<i>This is the third in a series looking back on 2015. Other entries will include <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-books.html">books</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-movies.html">movies</a>, music, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-television.html">TV</a>, and more.</i><br />
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When it comes to the world of culinary delights, there were certainly some hits and misses with the new things I tried in 2015. If you don’t count what was pretty much an extended working vacation in Nauvoo, Illinois during the summer, 2015 was the first complete calendar year I’ve spent living in Utah since 2005. That means plenty of exploring still needs to be done in terms of food. Much has changed about Utah in the past decade, after all, as has my lifestyle. And I’m not talking about the fact that I now consciously choose to eat a lot of fiber. I’m talking about my leaving the LDS Church and the dietary restrictions that go with it. That’s right, folks. 2015 is the year I started drinking those most evil of beverages, tea and coffee.<br />
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Tea has been the long-standing winner in the contest between tea and coffee. Melanie’s and my tea-drinking <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/02/joining-tea-party.html">started around early February of 2015</a>, with multiple trips to Teavana. It wasn’t long thereafter that <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/03/adventures-of-amateur-tea-drinker.html">we tried chai lattes</a> and fell instantly in love. I am quite a fan of both the iced and the hot varieties of chai. For a while, we were drinking quite a bit of flavored iced green teas, courtesy of Lipton® and their powdered tea mix. All of these tea practices largely subsided, however, once we discovered the joy of a Green Tea Frappuccino® from Starbucks. That quickly became our go-to standard. In the spring of 2015, we had a tradition of getting a Green Tea Frap every Monday when I’d pick Melanie up from work. To this day, Green Tea Fraps have remained one of the most common tea drinks for us to get. For Melanie, it’s always the Frappuccino® version, but I’ve become partial to iced green tea lattes with sugarless vanilla syrup in place of the classic syrup Starbucks usually uses. It’s very similar to a Frap in terms of flavor, and also cheaper.<br />
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Coffee still tasted like garbage to me when I tried it in February for the first time since junior high. I didn’t try it again until August, when I experienced an impromptu desire for it while at a hotel in Laramie, Wyoming <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/08/nauvoo-epic-look-back-on-epic-summer-of.html">on our way back from Nauvoo</a>. Being able to doctor the coffee myself, I had a much better experience, but I still drank hardly any of it before chucking it in the garbage. And then autumn arrived. I don’t know what compelled me to try coffee yet again, but Melanie and I stopped at a Starbucks one fall evening and I ordered a salted caramel mocha. Worried it would be too strong for me, I asked them to put only one shot of espresso in it rather than three as they normally would. The result? It was actually kind of good. It reminded me of these delicious caramel- and chocolate-covered pretzel sticks that we get every once in a very long while from a chocolate shop in the Avenues of Salt Lake City. Having enjoyed the drink, I thought I would try more of the seasonal specialty drinks Starbucks offered. And so, over the next few months, I tried several: Chestnut Praline Latte, Eggnog Latte, Peppermint Mocha, Pumpkin Spice Latte, and more. By far, my favorite was the Caramel Brulee Latte. In second place was the Holiday Spice Flat White. By the time I’d tried all of these drinks, I was no longer asking them to scale back the espresso. I was fine taking them full strength. I’d still say that I enjoy tea more than coffee, but coffee has its place. The last new coffee drink I tried in 2015 was a caramel macchiato that I got from a gas station (Maverik). It too was very delicious, although I’m not sure how high the coffee content actually is. It tastes so little like coffee to me that I’m skeptical. But maybe I’ve just developed a taste for it and can’t even tell when it’s there.<br />
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Okay, okay, this post wasn’t supposed to be all about coffee and tea! My taste buds have had other adventures over the past twelve months! One of the things Melanie and I have been the most desperate to discover in Utah is a really good Chinese restaurant. It’s funny, when we first left Utah in 2006, we complained about the lack of good Chinese food in the South. That complaint persisted until we discovered Tan’s Asian Café in Tallahassee, which remains my favorite Chinese restaurant of all time. Nothing we’ve eaten in Utah comes close to the quality of Tan’s. And believe me, we’ve tried. We’ve even looked at online reviews and tried to go to places only if they had decent feedback from consumers. It hasn’t worked out so well for us. <a href="http://www.mulanchinesesandy.com/">Mulan Chinese</a> was a disappointment, with thick and chewy (rather than crispy) egg rolls and pasty ham fried rice. Their dumplings and crab rangoons were actually good, but everything else registered as so-so at best. <a href="http://www.fongsindraper.com/">Fong’s Fine Chinese Dining</a> is a step up from Mulan and was good enough that I wouldn’t be against trying them again. I suspect you could get an all-around pretty good meal, if you just knew which particular items to get. Our particular meal was hit-and-miss. The ham fried rice was pretty flavorless, as was the broccoli beef. The latter tasted “brown,” and that’s honestly all I can think to say about it. The egg rolls weren’t bad and had a very peppery flavor, while the mango chicken and pon pon chicken (the latter of which I’d never had before) were both good. The sweet and sour sauce they brought out with the complimentary wontons was very thin and watery, unlike any sweet and sour sauce I’ve had anywhere else in the past, and the Diet Mountain Dew I was so excited to see on tap was also quite watered down. The service was ho-hum. They didn’t clear things from our table when they could have, and it became a crowded mess. We also had a problem with our bill that had to be rectified. Fortunately, I did find a Chinese restaurant that I thought was quite good all around: <a href="http://www.mandaringardensandy.com/">Mandarin Garden</a>. I went there for my birthday and was very pleased, although Melanie hasn’t been all that interested in returning since she and Peter both ended up puking the next morning. I don’t think it was related, but that doesn’t much matter. The damage was done.<br />
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We could always get some pretty good barbecue food in both Atlanta and Tallahassee, and 2015 saw us reaching out to some new (to us) BBQ joints in Utah. <a href="https://www.dickeys.com/">Dickey’s Barbecue Pit</a> is not a place I’d go out of my way for, but it’s solid. We’ve eaten there a couple of times now, one perk being that they offer free kid meals—seven days a week at one of the locations we visited! For being a <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fast_casual_restaurant">fast casual</a> restaurant, I was quite impressed with their ribs. They weren’t amazing, but I’ve had tougher, less enjoyable ribs from full-service restaurants numerous times in my life. My biggest complaint about Dickey’s is that none of the BBQ sauce is available in a squeeze bottle that lets you easily apply it to your food. Instead, all of the BBQ sauce resides in a common area and must be scooped out of a vat using a ladle and poured into little plastic cups, such as you might use for dipping sauces. But unless you’re eating wings or chicken nuggets, who dips into BBQ sauce? You shouldn’t have to dip ribs or pulled pork. You can pour the sauce from the cup onto the food, yes, but it’s messier and harder to control. I think it’s annoying.<br />
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<a href="http://wallabyssmokehouse.com/">Wallaby’s</a> is another BBQ place we tried last year, although I’m not entirely sure it’s a new place for us. You see, there used to be a Wallaby’s that served BBQ located maybe 30 or 40 minutes south of Salt Lake City. It disappeared many years ago, and now this new Wallaby’s has sprung up very near to where Melanie and I currently live. Is it the same? I’m not sure. The food doesn’t seem exactly the same—there isn’t the signature slice of white bread that accompanies your meal, for example—but how many BBQ restaurants named Wallaby’s can there be? We’ve only been to this new Wallaby’s once, but it was pretty good. I’d happily go there again.<br />
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The very best new restaurant I tried in 2015 is <a href="http://randrbbq.net/">R&R BBQ</a>. Word-of-mouth advertising is what drew me to R&R. One item in particular was receiving a lot of buzz: the Caveman Burger. I didn’t realize the Caveman Burger was a special item you could get only on Thursdays, but coincidentally enough, it was a Thursday the first (and thus far only) time we went. As described in <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/08/firsts.html">a previous blog post</a>, the Caveman Burger is “a yummy and indulgent burger featuring not only a ground beef patty, but butterflied links of smoked Andouille sausage and a helping of pulled pork, all topped with fried jalapenos, melted Monterey Jack cheese, and sweet BBQ sauce.” It’s exquisite, and everything else I tasted was also very, very good: the beef brisket, the mashed potatoes, the hush puppies, and even the French fries (which, let’s be honest, are not usually anything to crow about at BBQ restaurants). R&R is located in downtown SLC, which isn’t where Melanie and I spend a lot of time. That’s the only reason we haven’t gotten back to it yet, but we reminisce about it frequently enough.<br />
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Speaking of burgers, I tried some new burger places—or at least burger-friendly places—in ’15. I stuck to the grill side of the menu when my family visited <a href="http://bumblebeesbbq.wix.com/bumblebzbbq">Bumblebee’s BBQ & Grill</a>. Bumblebee’s has a very high rating on Facebook, but I have to wonder if the votes haven’t been stacked. I’m hesitant even to say the food was fair. The hamburger patties looked and tasted like they had been frozen. Flavor was minimal. My burger purported to come with “blue cheese sauce,” but featured only melted cheese and was otherwise very dry. Only if you drizzled some BBQ sauce on something did it have much flavor. The fries were so-so. Melanie got sweet potato fries, and they also seemed like something that started off frozen and came from a package. The menu is divided into American and Korean cuisine, and maybe it’s the Korean side that is their specialty. I realize people have different tastes in food, but based on what I tried, I am sincerely baffled that anyone would consider this place better than okay.<br />
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<a href="http://www.richsburgersngrub.com/">Rich’s Burgers n’ Grub</a> in downtown SLC was a winner. I’ve been only once and ran into a couple of snafus with them, but the food was high quality overall. I had the “Bacon Blue” burger, with gorgonzola (which was quite melted and oozy), bacon, and a squirt of blue cheese dressing. I threw on the tomatoes, pickles, and lettuce that came on the side. The result was messy, but tasty. On the side, my friend and I shared both the wings with buffalo sauce and an order of “Queso Fries.” The wings were unlike any I’ve had before, in that they weren’t wet at all but rather had almost like a dry rub to them. They were very crispy and tasted great. The Queso Fries had cheese sauce, diced tomatoes, and green chilis on them. Considering the toppings, the fries tasted fairly normal.<br />
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I’d put <a href="http://citrisgrill.com/">Citris Grill</a> as my #2 discovery of 2015. A large group of us from Community of Christ went there one day after church services. Almost six months later to the day, I returned with a couple of friends. Both times I had the BBQ Burger, with BBQ sauce, smoked gouda, and bacon, all served on a rosette bun. I thought the burger was excellent, although I will admit that on my first visit, there was a very tiny piece of bone in mine. For many people, that would probably be a deal breaker. I assume (and hope) it was a fluke. I had no such problems on my return visit. You can tell that all of their food is very high quality just by looking at it, so I’m giving them the benefit of the doubt. I’d like to return here, not only for the burger but for some of the items listed on their breakfast menu, many of which sound absolutely delectable.<br />
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I should definitely mention <a href="http://www.costavida.net/">Costa Vida</a> in this post, since it’s the new place I’ve ended up eating at the most. You’d think that means I love it, but I don’t. Costa Vida is pretty much an exact knockoff of the monumentally popular Café Rio. How do the two compare? It depends on what you order. On my first trip to Costa Vida, I ordered nachos with steak. I’ve never had nachos at Café Rio—and I don’t think they even offer them. The steak nachos were very good and extremely filling. If nachos are your thing, Costa Vida is a good option. When it comes to anything else I’ve tried, Café Rio is the clear winner. And at this point, I’ve tried quite a bit of the Costa Vida menu—tacos, enchiladas, and burritos, with various types of meat. I’ve also had service problems on multiple visits. One location that we visited, in the middle of the day on a weekend mind you, was out of numerous items that we tried to order. Having been wooed on my first visit, I’ve since been repeatedly underwhelmed by Costa Vida. If you told me I could never eat there again, I would merely shrug.<br />
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<a href="https://kneaders.com/">Kneaders</a> is another restaurant we’ve now tried a few times. Some of their stuff has been quite good, some of their stuff has been fine, but none of it has blown my mind. Someone told me the French Dip at Kneaders was the best sandwich in the world. It’s the first menu item I ordered from Kneaders, and I’m here to tell you, no, it absolutely is not the best sandwich in the world. It was just okay. There was not much meat on the sandwich at all—with a single, paper-thin layer of meat in some spots. The sandwich itself was also very dry. With a French Dip, crusty bread is great, but that’s not what I’m talking about here. It just seemed kind of old and stale, and the roast beef itself was not juicy. I’ve had more success with their soups. I can’t verify the exact name of their soups because they aren’t listed on the Kneaders website (fail!), but I’ve tried their loaded baked potato soup, their asiago soup, the red pepper gouda soup, and one called Autumn Bliss. I very much enjoyed the latter three. The potato soup was okay, but I’ve definitely had better.<br />
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I’ll conclude by talking about donuts. (Yay!) Back on National Donut Day (June 5th), Melanie and I decided to go out for donuts and chai lattes in the morning. The place we visited was called <a href="http://www.yelp.com/biz/zam-donuts-midvale">Zam Donuts</a>. Their selection behind the counter was very, very slim, but I can only assume it was because of the “holiday.” The available donuts were almost all very basic, so I got a glazed (which was fine, nothing more) and a chocolate raised. Photos of their other donuts looked promising, but I don’t feel compelled to return—which is probably good, because the place has since gone out of business.<br />
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On the other side of town is a place called <a href="http://www.yelp.com/biz/fresh-donut-and-deli-salt-lake-city">Fresh Donut & Deli</a>. It’s a lame name, but it matters not. The donuts here are the best I’ve found in Utah. My family was quite in love with Donut Kingdom in Tallahassee, and I’m not sure Fresh Donut & Deli rivals our Florida favorites. But they come pretty damn close. Of special note are the glazed donuts. Now, I know what some of you are thinking. Some people look at glazed donuts the way others look at vanilla ice cream—as inherently boring. And I grant that if a glazed donut isn’t excellent, it’s often not worth your time. But when you get a really good glazed donut, they are among the best donuts that will ever hit your tongue. The glazed donuts at Fresh Donut & Deli are of this caliber. It’s not just the flavor, it’s the texture. Words escape me. They are perfection. It’s a good thing they aren’t more conveniently located, or I’d be in some serious trouble. Seriously.Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-59643332082260631262016-01-14T17:43:00.000-07:002016-01-30T18:53:53.462-07:002015 in Review: Books<div class="MsoNormal"><i>This is the second in a series looking back on 2015. Other entries will include <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-movies.html">movies</a>, music, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-food.html">food</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-television.html">TV</a>, and more.</i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Compared to the year previous, my reading totals took a severe hit in 2015. Of course, 2014 was a remarkable year in which I read 58 books and nearly 14,000 pages. For 2015, my total (according to Goodreads) was 31 books and 8,468 pages. Yikes! I’m not sure what happened, to be honest. I was going strong during the first half of the year, but I feel like things slowed down dramatically after I returned from my summer stint in Nauvoo. August and September won’t so bad, but I completed only two total books between September 22<sup>nd</sup> and December 31<sup>st</sup>, one of which was rather small. I’m appalled.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Moving on, let’s take a look at what kinds of books I was reading in 2015. Of the 31 books I read, half (15 of them) were fiction. Of the 16 non-fiction books I read, 9 were books on Mormonism, broadly construed. I say “broadly construed” because one such book was on RLDS / Community of Christ history, and these people do not view themselves as Mormon. But you get the idea. This reveals yet another drastic shift in my reading habits—only 29% of the total books I read, or 56% of my non-fiction selections, were on Mormonism. This may have something to do with my conversion to Community of Christ, but was likely further influenced by my participation in a book club during some months of 2015. I wasn’t always choosing, in an explicit sense, the books I was reading. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-C7ZWsvekSGs/Vpg9zy2jZJI/AAAAAAAAFd4/5WZuvRNOq-Y/s1600/superfudge.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-C7ZWsvekSGs/Vpg9zy2jZJI/AAAAAAAAFd4/5WZuvRNOq-Y/s320/superfudge.jpg" width="209" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">10 of the books on my list are books that I read with my children, not including picture books. This also represents a slowdown in reading to my kids, which is sad. After reading the <i>Bunnicula </i>series and some of its spin-offs in 2014, we’ve struggled to know what to read together. For 2015, we latched onto the <b><i>Fudge </i></b>series by Judy Blume. The boys quite enjoyed the books, but Mom and Dad did not relish them nearly as much as we did the <i>Bunnicula </i>series. In fact, I gave two of the four <i>Fudge</i> books we read just two stars, and the other two I gave three stars. (Bear in mind that, unlike movies, I rate books on a five-star system so as to coincide with Goodreads). The best of the bunch was <b><i>Superfudge</i></b>, which we finished back in April. I had the impression Blume is supposed to be a great author, but I didn’t think her writing was all that great. Sometimes it was even on the poorer side. This is certainly true when it comes to narrative flow. One problem I had with the books was how episodic each of them felt. It may be that Blume captures something about child psychology, and captures it well, but the characters themselves are rather flat. I deem them fluffy entertainment. My kids seemed to enjoy them, which is great, but I wouldn’t recommend them <i>per se</i>.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Aside from Blume, only two authors showed up on my annual reading list more than once. One of them is another author of juvenile fiction, Louis Sachar. With Melanie and the boys, I read both <b><i>Holes </i></b>and <b><i>Sideways Stories from Wayside School</i></b>. Both were quite good. We read the latter, which featured some very off-the-wall humor, while in Nauvoo. I associate the book with sitting in the upstairs loft / bedroom of the Sidney Rigdon house, all three boys nestled into a single bed. Sigh. The other author to appear twice is Samuel Morris Brown. He wrote one of three books I read last year to which I would give a superlative five-star rating. That book is <b><i>In Heaven as It Is on Earth: Joseph Smith and the Early Mormon Conquest of Death</i></b>. Published by Oxford University Press, <i>In Heaven as It Is on Earth </i>explores the influence of death on founding Mormon prophet Joseph Smith’s developing theology. Brown argues that many developments in early Mormonism arose as the prophet Joseph both responded to and sought to overcome the prevalence of death around him—his brother, his own children, and so on. It’s a captivating read. Impressed by Brown’s earlier work, I excitedly picked up a copy of <b><i>First Principles and Ordinances: The Fourth Article of Faith in Light of the Temple</i></b>. Even having left the LDS Church, I continue to find LDS temple theology and the development thereof to be quite fascinating. Thus, I was quite disappointed by Brown’s book, to which I gave a low three stars. My main beef was that the concepts Brown presented were not fleshed out enough to appreciate or make complete sense of. As I said in my Goodreads review, “Brown draws some broad strokes with this book. They are intriguing enough that I want to stop and look at the picture he is painting, but I also wish he would come back and paint a bit more.”</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZvjhZQWz5ag/Vpg-sq-zZRI/AAAAAAAAFeA/fTfY2HMHFjo/s1600/mormonpolygamy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ZvjhZQWz5ag/Vpg-sq-zZRI/AAAAAAAAFeA/fTfY2HMHFjo/s320/mormonpolygamy.jpg" width="209" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">Continuing with the theme of Mormonism, three of my favorite reads from the year dealt heavily with the issue of polygamy. Richard S. Van Wagoner’s <b><i>Mormon Polygamy: A History</i></b> was originally published in 1986 but remains an excellent and extensive overview of Mormonism’s most infamous spiritual practice. The book had quite an impact on me. Prior to reading the book, I knew that Joseph Smith himself had practiced and yet publicly denied polygamy. I knew he was, sadly, rather deceptive to his legal wife Emma regarding his polygamous relationships. But I was shocked to learn just how pervasive and long-lasting the dishonesty surrounding polygamy was. Extensively lying to the public, and even to their own church members, about polygamy continued with several of the LDS Church Presidents that followed Joseph. I was also surprised to realize just how much of LDS culture today is influenced by its polygamous past. Several times during my reading of the book, I saw connections between the behaviors being encouraged in the polygamous heyday of the 1800s and the modern Mormon mindset. To cite just one example, the perpetuation of polygamy relied on convincing prospective plural wives that they should obey a church leader’s counsel no matter what, even if it didn’t sit well with them or they couldn’t understand why such a thing would be required. I find it interesting that such a mentality continues quite strongly in the LDS tradition and yet is starkly absent from Community of Christ, which has always decried, and in fact owes its existence in large part to its denunciation of, polygamy.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Another great read is Linda King Newell and Valeen Tippets Avery’s <b><i>Mormon Enigma: Emma Hale Smith</i></b>. Also written in the 1980s, <i>Mormon Enigma </i>remains the preeminent biography of Joseph Smith’s only legal wife, Emma. As one would expect, polygamy factors heavily into the book. I’d deem the book a must-read, even though the writing sometimes annoyed me. The content itself is excellent, but things aren’t always communicated clearly, and sometimes stories are thrown into the mix that seem like asides and not entirely relevant to the discussion at hand. On very rare occasions, the authors also appear biased toward a pro-LDS interpretation of events that isn’t adequately supported by the text. You may also find it interesting to know that, if you go to Nauvoo and take a tour of the historic sites owned by Community of Christ, a great deal of what you’ll hear can be found in <i>Mormon Enigma</i>.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-63F84bN1qGI/Vpg_yRt4SII/AAAAAAAAFeQ/pT3yoLQJCvE/s1600/polygamouswives.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-63F84bN1qGI/Vpg_yRt4SII/AAAAAAAAFeQ/pT3yoLQJCvE/s320/polygamouswives.jpg" width="212" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">The final book on polygamy that I read is <b><i>The Polygamous Wives Writing Club</i></b> by Paula Kelly Harline. Harline’s book, published in 2014, offers a fascinating peek into polygamy as it was lived among the average—that is to say, non-elite—members of the early LDS Church. The book is comprised largely of diary entries and the like from the plural wives of rank-and-file LDS men. These are not the women who were married to apostles and prophets, but those married to normal folk. By reading this book, you get an idea of what it was like for those women who practiced “celestial marriage” as part of an otherwise very normal, very routine life—which is not to suggest that these women were content in their situations. Despite being published by Oxford University Press, <i>The Polygamous Wives Writing Club </i>is a very approachable read, suitable for non-scholastics as well as those with a more academic bent. Early in the book, I feared a little too much speculation was creeping into the commentary supplied by the author, but it’s easy enough to overlook such things as one wishes. It’s a very worthwhile read.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I mentioned above that I was part of a book club in 2015. More specifically, it was the Salt Lake City congregation of Community of Christ book club (not an official title). I haven’t read every month’s selection, and I’m uncertain I’ll continue with the club at this point in time, but book club accounts for four of last year’s reads, plus one book that I read most of during December but didn’t officially complete until after the new year (disqualifying it from this list). The first such book I read was <b><i>Pastrix: The Cranky, Beautiful Faith of a Sinner & Saint</i></b> by Nadia Bolz-Weber. I got the impression that everyone else in book club had gone goo-goo ga-ga over this book, but I found it rather middle of the road—for the same reason, I think, that two other hugely popular book club selections didn’t really resonate with me. They feel like fluff pieces to me. There really isn’t much depth to them at all. They might contain a handful of quotes worth remembering, although even those are often only the caliber of something you’d see on a motivational poster or passed around on Facebook as part of some feel-good meme. And that seems to be the aim of these books: to make you feel good and motivated. Problem is, they seem to rehash their own ideas over and over and over again without ever diving too deeply below the surface. The other books that fall into this category are <b><i>The Gifts of Imperfection</i></b> by Brené Brown (which I enjoyed even less than <i>Pastrix</i>) and the book I finished last week and so can’t officially count (<i>Learning to Walk in the Dark </i>by Barbara Brown Taylor).</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-h3R0Cgm559A/VphABjn8E7I/AAAAAAAAFeY/uUuHU1FtVoc/s1600/livingbuddha.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-h3R0Cgm559A/VphABjn8E7I/AAAAAAAAFeY/uUuHU1FtVoc/s320/livingbuddha.jpg" width="176" /></a>Two of the book club selections I read were actually pretty good. <b><i>I Am Malala</i></b> by Malala Yousafzai with Christina Lamb, which tells the story of <i>The Girl Who Stood Up for Education and Was Shot by the Taliban</i> (as the subtitle reminds you) is undeniably engaging. How can you not be pulled into such a story? And yet the writing itself is not particularly memorable. There were moments when it seemed obvious the reader was getting much more of Lamb’s journalistic voice than Malala’s own. There were also moments when the things being said felt obligatory, motivated by public relations, and/or otherwise mildly contrived. You can’t go wrong reading it, but it’s not a story that’s worthwhile because of the way it’s told.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">My favorite book club selection of 2015 turned out to be <b><i>Living Buddha, Living Christ </i></b>by Thich Nhat Hanh, a Buddhist monk who argues that, at their core, Buddhism and Christianity are really teaching the same things. I’m very much drawn toward ecumenical and interfaith types of ideas, and I’m a universalist at heart. It’s easy to see why I would like this book better than some of the others. There is also a great deal more wisdom—honest-to-goodness wisdom, folks—packed into this book, gems like:</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><i>To “love our enemy” is impossible, because the moment we love him, he is no longer our enemy.<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">And here is, I believe, an excellent and beautiful defense of religious pluralism:</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="margin-left: .5in;"><i>It is good that an orange is an orange and a mango is a mango. The colors, the smells, and the tastes are different, but looking deeply, we see that they are both authentic fruits. Looking more deeply, we can see the sunshine, the rain, the minerals, and the earth in both of them. Only their manifestations are different. Authentic experience makes a religion a true tradition. Religious experience is, above all, human experience. If religions are authentic, they contain the same elements of stability, joy, peace, understanding, and love. The similarities as well as the differences are there. They differ only in terms of emphasis. Glucose and acid are in all fruits, but their degrees differ. We cannot say that one is a real fruit and the other is not.<o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Now let’s move on to the best of the best, from both fiction and non-fiction.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-JrLKthVXOCU/VphARfwVnKI/AAAAAAAAFeg/AEzRtzA8ya0/s1600/jsiii.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-JrLKthVXOCU/VphARfwVnKI/AAAAAAAAFeg/AEzRtzA8ya0/s320/jsiii.jpg" width="211" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">My absolute favorite read of the year, which also happens to be non-fiction, is <b><i>Joseph Smith III: Pragmatic Prophet</i></b> by Roger D. Launius. I finished <i>Pragmatic Prophet </i>in early May, shortly after I had officially become a member of Community of Christ. I wanted to learn more about the first president of the church after the death of founding prophet, Joseph Smith (Jr.). I had grown up accepting Brigham Young as Smith’s rightful successor, but the more I’ve learned about Young over the years, the more horrified I’ve become. Reading <i>Pragmatic Prophet </i>was an eye-opening experience, not only because I knew next to nothing about the so-called succession crisis or the early days of what became known as the RLDS Church, but because Joseph Smith III provides such an astoundingly stark contrast to the man I had always believed rightfully held the title of prophet and president after Joseph Smith’s death. The difference between the two men is truly astonishing. I fell in love with Joseph Smith III while reading this scholarly work, published by University of Illinois Press. He was a humble and sincere man who sought to do only what he truly felt God wanted him to do. Especially powerful to me were the dreams and/or visions of Joseph Smith III that seem so clearly to foretell of the two distinct paths that the LDS and the RLDS churches would take. <i>Pragmatic Prophet </i>solidified for me the notion that God is and always has been a part of the RLDS / Community of Christ tradition, no matter how much God has also been involved in LDS history. I’m not the type of person that would want to limit God’s influence to only one of the two churches, but not everyone would be as generous as I.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Other highly recommendable works of non-fiction:</div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><ul><li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>The Righteous Mind: Why Good People are Divided by Politics and Religion</i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> by Jonathan Haidt</span></li>
<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>Yes Please</i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> by Amy Poehler</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Symbol; text-indent: -0.25in;"><span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman'; font-size: 7pt; font-stretch: normal;"> </span></span><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>Standing Apart: Mormon Historical Consciousness and the Concept of Apostasy</i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> by Miranda Wilcox and John D. Young, Editors</span></li>
</ul><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TNvUOBbhXtM/VphAePVGAEI/AAAAAAAAFeo/Qgne_a0-93w/s1600/edgarmint.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TNvUOBbhXtM/VphAePVGAEI/AAAAAAAAFeo/Qgne_a0-93w/s320/edgarmint.jpg" width="207" /></a></div><div class="MsoNormal">The best work of fiction I read in 2015 is Brady Udall’s 2001 novel <b><i>The Miracle Life of Edgar Mint</i></b>. It’s a quirky, depressively humorous book that features a catchy story and an even catchier voice in main character and narrator, Edgar Mint. Edgar is the perpetual victim who never sees himself as such, even when a mailman accidentally runs over his head with a mail truck at the age of seven. Edgar is, understandably, a little odd from that point forward, but he’s someone you’ll love spending time with. Now, it’s true that Edgar spends some of his time in a Mormon foster-family, but I promise that’s not the only reason I liked this book.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Other highly recommendable works of fiction:</div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><ul><li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>The Boy Who Drew Monsters</i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> by Keith Donahue</span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> </span><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">(One of the most genuinely creepy “scary” books I’ve ever read!)</span></li>
<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>Heroes of the Dustbin</i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;"> by Tyler Whitesides</span></li>
<li><b style="text-indent: -0.25in;"><i>Finders Keepers </i></b><span style="text-indent: -0.25in;">by Stephen King</span></li>
</ul>Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-42702733929680589902016-01-08T11:45:00.002-07:002019-05-11T21:55:13.735-06:002015 in Review: Movies<div class="MsoNormal"><i>This is the first in a series looking back on 2015. Other entries will include <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-books.html">books</a>, music, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-food.html">food</a>, <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2016/01/2015-in-review-television.html">TV</a>, and more. <o:p></o:p></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">In 2014, I saw 147 movies I hadn’t seen before. In 2015, I saw a whopping 182. Here is a breakdown of how many movies would receive how many stars, if I were to rate them using a standard four-star system where four stars is the best and zero stars is the worst:</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">**** = 9</div><div class="MsoNormal">***½ = 20</div><div class="MsoNormal">*** = 41</div><div class="MsoNormal">**½ = 40</div><div class="MsoNormal">** = 42</div><div class="MsoNormal">*½ = 14</div><div class="MsoNormal">* = 10</div><div class="MsoNormal">Zero = 5<br />
(Unreviewed = 1)</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Average movie rating: **½</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Despite watching nearly 24% more movies this year than last, I saw 25% fewer four-star movies. On the other hand, I saw 400% more zero-star movies. Perhaps I was being extra judgmental. More likely, I was not being picky enough in what I watched.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Like last year, I will now revisit the highs and lows (and a few in-betweens) of my 2015 movie-watching experience, based on genre.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Drama</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aeuR-XjQ3ds/Vo_1uJOX2wI/AAAAAAAAFbw/aJ4H_ikLXog/s1600/Room.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-aeuR-XjQ3ds/Vo_1uJOX2wI/AAAAAAAAFbw/aJ4H_ikLXog/s320/Room.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>One of the top five films I saw in 2014 was <i>Short Term 12</i> starring Brie Larson. The best 2015 film I saw (although not necessarily the best film that I saw in 2015) also stars Brie Larson and is called <b><i>Room</i></b>. <i>Room</i> is the story of a mother and her young son (played by Jacob Tremblay), who have spent the last several years—the entirety of the boy’s life, in fact—locked in a kidnapper’s shed. The boy doesn’t even know that a world beyond the interior walls of the shed exists. While elements of <i>Room</i> may strain credibility, Larson’s and Tremblay’s performances are mesmerizing and the film grew more impressive and nuanced upon reflection than I first gave it credit. What initially struck me as shortcomings of the film I now believe were purposeful and brilliant. Without giving too much away, I believe the filmmakers wanted the viewers, like the boy at the center of the film, to have a confined experience of the world within the film.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I was also captivated by <b><i>The Stanford Prison Experiment</i></b>, a dramatization of the infamous psychological experiment of the early 1970s. Critics weren’t wild about the film, but I found it harrowing and engrossing. Some might complain that, given the subject matter, this movie doesn’t plumb the psychology of its characters enough. But I thought the objective, empirical—call it cold if you like—approach was very effective. This is a story that doesn’t require a heavy-handed musical score or an eloquent speech in order to convey the gravitas of the situation it portrays. The facts speak for themselves.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Love & Mercy</i></b> is another 2015 release, a biopic about Beach Boys genius Brian Wilson. Calling the film a biopic may be a bit misleading, since the film revolves around two fairly limited timeframes in Wilson’s life: the writing, recording, and release of <i>Pet Sounds</i>, and Brian’s romance with Melinda Ledbetter in the 1980s, a relationship nearly suffocated by Brian’s abusive psychiatric caretaker, Dr. Eugene Landy. The filmmakers chose to cast two different actors to portray Brian in these different eras: Paul Dano as 1960s Brian, and John Cusack as 1980s Brian. Dano is brilliant, but Cusack—whom I once considered a favorite actor but who has starred mostly in duds over the last couple of decades—is also commendable. I’ve now seen the film twice, and while I worried Cusack’s version of Brian was too opaque upon my first viewing, my second viewing convinced me that this is one of the best films of 2015.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FLOdqy4i6hM/Vo_2xZS7DcI/AAAAAAAAFb4/NivDzAdC0P4/s1600/whiplash.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-FLOdqy4i6hM/Vo_2xZS7DcI/AAAAAAAAFb4/NivDzAdC0P4/s320/whiplash.jpg" width="215" /></a>When it comes to more mainstream filmmakers—those whose films have broad appeal and tend to be released by the big studios—Robert Zemeckis has long been a favorite of mine. He’s the man behind such classics as <i>Who Framed Roger Rabbit?</i>, <i>Contact</i>, <i>Cast Away</i>, and the <i>Back to the Future </i>trilogy. In 2015, Zemeckis gave us <b><i>The Walk</i></b>, a dramatization of high-wire artist Philippe Petit’s unauthorized tightrope walk between the newly opened World Trade Center towers. This stunt was the topic of the excellent 2008 documentary <i>Man on Wire</i>, where Petit himself told the majority of his own story. Zemeckis attempts to replicate the documentary feel by having Joseph Gordon-Levitt’s version of Petit narrate the film, often speaking directly to the camera. In the case of <i>The Walk</i>, it is a hindrance. I found the constant interruptions and shifts in narrative tone distracting as they repeatedly pulled you out of the story. As a result, the film was less dramatic than it should have been. That being said, I have never experienced so much anxiety watching a movie as I did during the final act of <i>The Walk</i>. It was almost unbearable, and credit must be given to Zemeckis. In the end, I gave it a very hesitant ***½.<br />
<br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><div class="MsoNormal">Some of the very best dramas I saw in 2015 were released in previous years. Per usual, I spent the early part of the year catching up on the critically acclaimed and awards-nominated films of the previous year. I was not disappointed. 2014 Best Picture nominees <b><i>Boyhood</i></b>, <b><i>Whiplash</i></b>, and <b><i>American Sniper</i></b> were all four-star movies in my book. <b><i>Foxcatcher</i></b> was an eerily despondent film that garnered Steve Carell a Best Actor nomination for his portrayal of real-life multimillionaire John E. DuPont. As powerful as <i>Foxcatcher </i>was, I think the Best Actor nomination should have gone to Jake Gyllenhaal for his performance in the superior film <b><i>Nightcrawler</i></b>.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">2014 also gave us <b><i>Wild </i></b>and <b><i>Calvary</i></b>. Critics weren’t as unanimously impressed with these two films, but they were among the top 10 or so films I saw within the last year. Meanwhile, I wasn’t quite as enamored of 2014 Best Picture nominee <b><i>The Imitation Game</i> </b>as my fellow moviegoers seemed to be. I thought it was very good, but didn’t strike an appropriate balance between what became the two central plots of the film. The ending felt, to me, as though the movie veered off in an entirely different direction, and not in a surprising or good way. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Comedy<o:p></o:p></i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PKv69nqucx4/Vo_3Lz2jMMI/AAAAAAAAFcE/1PxcyRnGu1w/s1600/spy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PKv69nqucx4/Vo_3Lz2jMMI/AAAAAAAAFcE/1PxcyRnGu1w/s320/spy.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>The best comedy of 2015 was <b><i>Spy</i></b>. I was shocked at how much I enjoyed the film, which received a Golden Globe nomination for Best Comedy. It is the only straight-up comedy that I saw in 2015 to which I would give more than three stars. However, I found myself smitten by several comedy-blends, as I shall call them—comedies that quailed just as much to fit into other categories, such as action or horror. <b><i>Kingsman: The Secret Service </i></b>struck me as James Bond meets <i>Kick-Ass</i>, and it was only after I made this comparison that I learned <i>Kick-Ass</i> was brought to you by the same writers and director as <i>Kingsman</i>. The film contains rampant and comically gratuitous violence, with Samuel L. Jackson as the lisping super villain who projectile vomits at the sight of blood. How can you not love it? In a similar vein, <b><i>American Ultra</i></b> is essentially a hard-R, stoner version of the NBC series <i>Chuck</i>. In the lead roles are two of the most one-note actors in existence, Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart, and yet they seemed perfectly cast here. (This is probably the only time I’ve enjoyed Eisenberg outside of <i>The Social Network</i>, in fact.) Neither <i>Kingsman</i> nor <i>American Ultra</i> received much love from critics, especially the latter, but I loved them. Slightly more mediocre was the horror comedy <b><i>Cooties</i></b>, the joint creative effort of Ian Brennan, writer for TVs <i>Glee</i>, and Leigh Whannell, who wrote several of the <i>Saw </i>films. <i>Cooties </i>is everything you’d expect from such a whacky combination of writers, and it provides persistent campy fun. I wouldn’t give <i>Cooties </i>more than three stars, but something tells me it has a high replay value.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">If you’re looking for something a little more cerebral and kooky, might I recommend <b><i>Frank</i></b>. I gave <i>Frank </i>three stars, but there is something surprisingly deep and poignant about this bizarre film. It is the story of Jon, a keyboardist who joins a band headed by lead singer Frank, a man who wears a giant papier-mâché head almost 24 hours per day. Like I said, it’s kooky. But <i>Frank </i>speaks to more issues than meets the eye—it is an examination of celebrity, of creativity, of self-esteem and self-doubt, and maybe even of religion. It’s a very engaging piece of independent film.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Animated Films</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Qe9JcxITF-Q/Vo_3ciKyl9I/AAAAAAAAFcM/s4BuXr4sv7s/s1600/shaun%2Bthe%2Bsheep.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-Qe9JcxITF-Q/Vo_3ciKyl9I/AAAAAAAAFcM/s4BuXr4sv7s/s320/shaun%2Bthe%2Bsheep.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>It used to be that animated films were often among the best films of the year. That just isn’t the case anymore. I saw several animated films in 2015, but only two garner a solid recommendation from me. One solid three-star film is <b><i>Shaun the Sheep Movie</i></b>, a big-screen adaptation of the stop-motion animation TV series, brought to us by the same folks who did <i>Wallace & Gromit</i> and <i>Chicken Run</i>. While it may not be the funniest film these people have done, it was an improvement over 2012’s <i>The Pirates! Band of Misfits</i>. The other animated film I gave three stars, though barely so, was <b><i>The Book of Life</i></b>. It had a few solid jokes, and its unique animation style was both captivating and fun—albeit at times it was visually much too busy.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I saw a bunch of animated films I’d give two-and-a-half stars, which makes them minimally recommendable. They include <b><i>The Boxtrolls</i></b>, <b><i>Hotel Transylvania 2</i></b> (which I slept through much of, so take my recommendation very lightly), the CGI/real-life hybrid <b><i>Paddington</i></b>, and <b><i>Home</i></b>, which was much less annoying than I expected it to be. I was disappointed with <b><i>The Peanuts Movie</i></b>, to which I gave two stars. The film was simple and sweet, which is refreshing in this day and age, and I loved the blend of computer animation and what appeared to be hand-drawn facial features of the Peanuts gang. But the sweet simplicity and classic Peanuts feel were largely accomplished by recycling old bits from past TV specials and consistently failing to tread new ground. There wasn’t much to the film at all, really, and so it was kind of boring.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Documentaries</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4ObZMKuSsQU/Vo_355_O5DI/AAAAAAAAFcY/erN2Z5dl6dc/s1600/youngatheart.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-4ObZMKuSsQU/Vo_355_O5DI/AAAAAAAAFcY/erN2Z5dl6dc/s320/youngatheart.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>I didn’t see any absolutely outstanding documentaries in 2015, but I saw some good ones. One of the best is <b><i>I Am Chris Farley</i></b>, about the rise and fall of the beloved comedian and <i>Saturday Night Live </i>alumnus. One could argue that the film is more of a eulogy than a documentary, but it’s a touching and sensitive one, and fans of Farley are sure to appreciate it. To be fair, the film must be faulted as a documentary for not veering into the dark side of Farley’s life. The movie practically avoids saying what Farley’s actual problem was, relying (it seems) on viewers to bring that basic understanding with them. Questions are raised and things alluded to, but the film fails to explore them. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">My favorite documentary that I saw in 2015 was 2007’s <b><i>Young@Heart</i></b>. It follows the Young at Heart Chorus in Northampton, MA, a group of enthusiastic, geriatric crooners whose average age is 81. But these folks aren’t singing show tunes. They’re singing punk rock songs from The Ramones and The Clash, belting out James Brown, and doing their best to wrap their minds, ears, and vocal chords around the weirdness of Sonic Youth. It’s a must-see.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Other recommendable documentaries include 2014’s <b><i>An Honest Liar</i></b> and 2015’s <b><i>Going Clear: Scientology and the Prison of Belief</i></b>. The latter is biased and not a terrific documentary, but it is eye-opening and compelling. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Thrillers</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i>Nightcrawler</i>, which I already mentioned in the drama section above, is the only thriller I saw in 2015 to which I would give four stars. However, there were some superb thrillers that came just half-a-star shy of a perfect score. <b><i>Blue Ruin</i></b> is an exercise in patient intensity, the story of a man who seeks revenge for the murder of his parents and ends up at war with another family. The film is both powerful and original, if not a bit light on actual story. I also found <b><i>The Drop</i></b>—featuring one of James Gandolfini’s final screen roles—to be a very strong film, though critics found it only mildly recommendable on the whole. <b><i>Locke </i></b>is another great thriller. Actually, I’m not sure it is a thriller in the proper sense. Pretty much the entire film takes place inside a car with only one character visible onscreen, Ivan Locke, who receives phone call after phone call after phone call that fuels his anxiety and ours. The tension that mounts is palpable, and given the film’s narrative monotony, it is surprising just how effective, gripping, and poignant it turns out to be.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Foreign Film</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iuGvV2ieWVQ/Vo_4NSvIEtI/AAAAAAAAFcg/0qkgMH_rqZ4/s1600/wearethebest.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iuGvV2ieWVQ/Vo_4NSvIEtI/AAAAAAAAFcg/0qkgMH_rqZ4/s320/wearethebest.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>The Swedish film <b><i>We Are the Best!</i></b> finished in the top ten of movies I saw in 2015. The story is set in 1980s Stockholm, where a trio of teen—maybe even preteen?—girls decide to form a punk band. The film is do damned earnest and the characters so genuine, you’ll think you’re watching a documentary half the time. It’s a great coming of age story, far from the typical fare, and well worth your time. I implore you to check it out. You’ll find yourself cheering for the would-be anarchists by the end of the movie. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Also hailing from Sweden, 2014’s <b><i>Force Majeure </i></b>is a deft, hard-hitting examination of human psychology. On a ski trip to the French Alps, Ebba, her husband Tomas, and their children are nearly swept away by an avalanche. When the near-disaster subsides, Ebba and Tomas remember the incident differently—and are haunted by the potential ramifications. It may not sound like much, but <i>Force Majeure</i> is in the top 6% of movies I saw in 2015. Pensive, if not a bit slow, the film is so realistic in its exchanges and humanity that you’ll fear what it reveals about you. It also features some powerful cinematography. Check it out.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Sci-fi, Superheroes, and the Like</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Maybe my memory is faulty, but science fiction seemed to have greater representation among movies I watched in 2015 than it has in many years previous. Thankfully, many of those films were quite good. <b><i>Ex Machina</i></b> is one of the top two or three films of 2015 that I saw and is within the top ten films of any year that I watched during the past twelve months. The basic storyline is nothing new, centering on the possibility of human-like consciousness in androids run on artificial intelligence. But writer and director Alex Garland manages to give this familiar motif a very fresh coat of paint. It is a subdued, engrossing, stylish, and thought-provoking film.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-N0rv7WoY-Lo/Vo_4-Xp1cFI/AAAAAAAAFcw/Yg-v_2UjISo/s1600/themartian.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-N0rv7WoY-Lo/Vo_4-Xp1cFI/AAAAAAAAFcw/Yg-v_2UjISo/s320/themartian.jpg" width="216" /></a></div><b><i>The Martian </i></b>was among 2015’s strongest Hollywood movies, meaning a movie with big-name celebrities, a large production budget, and that thrives on mass appeal. While I gave the film three-and-a-half stars and ranked it among the top five 2015 films and top fifteen overall films that I saw last year, I must admit I am surprised by its slew of award nominations, including three for the Golden Globes. Many scenes felt pandering, and there was one moment in particular that struck me as so absurd and unbelievable that it almost ruined the whole movie. Nevertheless, it is a highly entertaining flick. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Just a notch below <i>The Martian</i>, I ranked 2014’s <b><i>Interstellar</i></b>. While it isn’t my favorite Christopher Nolan flick, I was impressed. Further down the list you’ll find <b><i>I Origins </i></b>and <b><i>Dawn of the Planet of the Apes</i></b>, two solidly commendable three-star films from 2014. 2015’s <b><i>Chappie </i></b>warranted only two-and-a-half stars from me, but it leaves a lasting impression. It was <i>Short Circuit </i>meets <i>Robocop</i>, and everything good and bad that you can imagine of such a thing. The plot and supporting characters could’ve been more richly developed, but Chappie himself was a well-developed and engaging character. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">A lot of big films fell disappointingly flat in this category. Most of them were mildly enjoyable but far from being the epic films we’ve come to expect of superhero and franchise films. I’m thinking here of <b><i>Jurassic World</i></b>, <b><i>Avengers: Age of Ultron</i></b>, and <b><i>Ant-Man</i></b>. All of these were decent, but that’s about as enthusiastic as I can get. Fortunately, <b><i>The Hunger Games: Mockingjay – Part 2</i></b> proved an exception and brought its franchise back to form after a very disappointing <i>Part 1</i>. I still gave the second <i>Mockingjay </i>installment only three stars, but it provided a satisfactory conclusion to the immensely popular series.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Classics</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I branched out a bit more in 2015 than I typically do in terms of seeing older films. It’s not that I purposely avoid older films, but it’s true that I see them only somewhat rarely. Several of the classics I saw were very good or better. Martin Scorsese’s 1976 film <b><i>Taxi Driver</i></b> is deserving of its four-star reputation. From 1957, Ingmar Bergman’s <b><i>The Seventh Seal </i></b>was interesting. I thought it was extremely good, but I’d like to see it again to see if I can appreciate it even more. It wasn’t quite what I thought it would be. 1989’s <b><i>Crimes and Misdemeanors</i></b> was just one of several Woody Allen films I saw this year, and certainly the best of the lot.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Another well-reviewed classic I saw for the first time in 2015 was 1958’s <b><i>Vertigo</i></b>. I have to say, as good a film as it was, it is undeniably dated. And by “dated,” I mean there are elements of it that simply are not holding up well. This doesn’t happen with every old movie. It isn’t unavoidable. Another Hitchcock film, <i>Psycho</i>, remains one of my favorite films of all time, and I think it is one of the most perfectly made films I’ve ever seen. In contrast, I felt very iffy about <i>Vertigo</i>, which at times is downright melodramatic. This is another one I wouldn’t mind re-watching and seeing if I find it any better. </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">I also saw a couple of “second tier classics,” as I’ll call them. They weren’t as strong as the films above, but they were good. Included here is 1971’s <b><i>The French Connection</i></b>. It wasn’t all that strong on plot or character development, but you can see in retrospect how it was influential. I think that’s why it’s so critically acclaimed, but watching it in 2015, it’s nothing amazing. There is something very organically gritty about it, but the machismo feels passé.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The other good but not terrific classic I saw was the 1960 version of <b><i>The Little Shop of Horrors</i></b>. It was both clever and funny, and I was impressed by how much I enjoyed it, considering it is 55 years old. I guess I don’t expect comedies to hold up nearly so well over time.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>The Overrated, The Underrated</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0YcSPdXEZSE/Vo_54rXlt-I/AAAAAAAAFc8/4oowPgyta_8/s1600/intothewoods.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0YcSPdXEZSE/Vo_54rXlt-I/AAAAAAAAFc8/4oowPgyta_8/s320/intothewoods.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>There are always several movies per year that I watch only to be baffled by the critical reception those movies received. Sometimes I cannot understand why a movie was given such high praise, and sometimes I don’t understand why a movie went so unappreciated. As a policy, I look at the critical reviews only after I’ve assessed and rated the film according to my own standards. Usually, I am not too wildly out of synch with the critical consensus—which, for the record, I am basing on the website <a href="http://www.metacritic.com/">Metacritic</a>, which provides an aggregate score between 1 and 100 that averages the major critic’s reviews. If a movie receives a Metascore of 50, that means that on average, movie critics placed the film right in the middle of whatever their ranking system happens to be: two out of four stars, two-and-a-half out of five stars, 5 out of 10, etc. The films I discuss below were overrated or underrated based on comparing my review to the film’s Metascore. It’s worth noting that I do not mention in this section any movie that I gave one star or fewer, since pretty much all of those were overrated in my book. I’ll discuss those movies in the next section of this post.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The Disney musical <b><i>Into the Woods</i></b> received a Metascore of 69, suggesting a consensus of mildly favorable reviews. I gave the film one-and-a-half stars. I didn’t know it was based on an actual stage play until after I watched the movie, but that’s where the troubles begin. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, stage plays turned into movies all too easily suck. That’s because there is a difference in style between a stage play and a movie, and if your movie feels too much like an actual stage play, it comes across terribly. <i>Into the Woods</i> is a great example. You can tell they got nothing extra out of it by turning it into a movie—in which case, why bother? The onscreen scenery is mostly just people surrounded by trees, looking at each other as they sing. Pretty boring. And the songs were both incessant and meandering. Not a memorable melody in the bunch. It sounded like songs that someone with modest talent might improvise on the spot.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J7JEMOitvso/Vo_6jPhjVeI/AAAAAAAAFdE/mlE4GcwCpw4/s1600/snowpiercer.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J7JEMOitvso/Vo_6jPhjVeI/AAAAAAAAFdE/mlE4GcwCpw4/s320/snowpiercer.jpg" width="216" /></a></div>Also overrated was the film sci-fi action thriller <b><i>Lucy</i></b>, starring Scarlett Johansson who turns into something like the Bionic Woman when a bag of strange drugs inadvertently gets into her system. Though the film featured some interesting philosophical elements, it was embarrassingly ridiculous at many parts. I gave the film one-and-a-half stars, a far cry from its Metascore of 61.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">One of the most baffling movies to make this list is <b><i>Snowpiercer</i></b>. This futuristic, dark, dystopian film where the planet’s only remaining human beings live and die in a caste system society housed entirely on a continuously moving train—no joke—has a Metascore of 84. This means the film averages nearly a three-and-a-half star rating on a four-star rating scale. This means that many critics gave the film four stars, finding it excellent. I thought it barely warranted two stars, noting that it is “stylistically melodramatic” and “often rather ridiculous.” This one is a head-scratcher for sure.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Listen Up Phillip</i> </b>has a solid Metascore of 76. It is the story of a bitter, self-absorbed writer. It is extremely dull and tedious, and I couldn’t give it more than two stars. I struggle to articulate why it is that some movies that excel in realism and don’t have much going on can be so damn good while others seem like pretentious BS. <i>Listen Up Phillip </i>is more the latter, unfortunately. I’m sure it didn’t help that the film had a very dry tone, complete with bland, matter-of-fact narration, all too reminiscent of 1970s educational filmstrips that people my age had to endure in elementary school.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Yet another highly overrated movie is <b><i>Two Days, One Night</i></b>, which received a whole slew of awards nominations (and wins), including a Best Actress Academy Award nomination for Marion Cotillard. The film centers on the character of Sandra (Cotillard), a woman who has lost her job to a vote. It seems her coworkers would prefer a pay raise to keeping Sandra around. With limited time to reverse the decision, <i>Two Days, One Night </i>follows Sandra as she goes about town, hunting down her coworkers and begging them to reconsider. It is quite literally as interesting a movie as watching someone go door-to-door trying to get people to sign a petition—because that’s almost literally what the movie is. Were there good performances? Sure. But it’s not as if there’s enough character development for us to care or even feel all that invested in Sandra’s campaign. She doesn’t even seem that passionate about it herself. And the interactions she has quickly feel like a broken record, with almost every conversation going through the exact same routine and pattern of comments. I don’t get the hype. At all. Somehow this movie has a Metascore of 89.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D5oXSDiiqn8/Vo_60NEmuXI/AAAAAAAAFdM/lJq1PVbidHU/s1600/madmaxfuryroad.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-D5oXSDiiqn8/Vo_60NEmuXI/AAAAAAAAFdM/lJq1PVbidHU/s320/madmaxfuryroad.jpg" width="219" /></a></div>And of course, I must mention <b><i>Mad Max: Fury Road</i></b>. It has become one of the most acclaimed films of 2015, with award nominations aplenty and an impressive Metascore of 89. I concur that the film had some absolutely spectacular visuals—but that’s where my praise ends. <i>Fury Road </i>is a lobotomizing film that made me question the consistency of the movie critics who sung its praises with such enthusiasm. I could easily see a movie just like this being absolutely panned if it came from a director critics weren’t too keen on. Stylistically, I saw <i>Fury Road</i> as a cross between the films of Baz Luhrmann and Rob Zombie. Curious, I looked up old reviews of Luhrmann’s <i>Moulin Rouge</i>, and some of the complaints lodged against it seemed entirely fitting of <i>Fury Road</i>. Why certain things are ingenious in one movie but dead weight in another, I shall never know. I give <i>Fury Road</i> a very high two-star rating, but can’t say I’d recommend it.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">When it comes to underrated movies, Jason Reitman’s 2014 film <b><i>Men, Women & Children</i></b> carries a Metascore of 38, suggesting it warrants one-and-a-half stars on a four-star rating system. I gave the film three stars. As a cautionary tale about the dangers of social media, the movie is perhaps a bit too bleak and pessimistic. I could see some depressing plot developments coming from a mile away. And yet, despite its depressive myopia, <i>Men, Women & Children </i>remains believable and features very strong performances from its large ensemble cast.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Including <i>Men, Women & Children</i>, I saw more Adam Sandler movies this year than I probably ever have. I’ll discuss several of them throughout this blog post. One such movie is <b><i>The Cobbler</i></b>, with Sandler as a shoe repairman who discovers a magical relic that allows him to take on the appearance of any other human—provided he is wearing the other person’s shoes. (Deep stuff, man!) It’s a bit hokey, and for being a fairytale, it’s a bit dark and amoral. But all things considered, Sandler gave a decent performance and the movie was surprisingly enjoyable. I can only assume critics were all too eager to dump on anything involving Sandler, and I can understand why that would be a matter of habit for them. But for all this film’s flaws—and I admit that the weak yet overdone ending was a major one—it wasn’t <i>that </i>bad.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6nNj1lGPk8E/Vo_7KDOWaZI/AAAAAAAAFdU/FWyKzAvHZeA/s1600/pixels.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-6nNj1lGPk8E/Vo_7KDOWaZI/AAAAAAAAFdU/FWyKzAvHZeA/s320/pixels.jpg" width="228" /></a></div>I promise I didn’t realize when I started writing this that the first three underrated films of the year would star Adam Sandler. But the next film on my underrated list is <b><i>Pixels</i></b>. Now, I didn’t think <i>Pixels </i>was a cinematic masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. But a Metascore of 27 suggests the film is outright bad from start to finish. And it was better than that. For those of us with a soft spot for 1980s arcade games, it could even be sort of fun. Dumb, yes, but fun.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Moving away from Adam Sandler, I thought <b><i>Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles </i></b>was an okay popcorn flick. Sometimes I think it helps when you go into a movie with very low expectations, as I did with this one. Could it have been better? Undoubtedly. Could the turtles have had more personality? For sure. But goodness gracious, what can you really expect of a movie like this? I think critics had already decided it was a piece of crap before they watched it, which explains the movie’s low Metascore of 31.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Quality wise, the 2014 version of <b><i>Annie</i></b> was pretty much on par with <i>TMNT</i>. Thus, I considered it mildly recommendable, while critical reviews resulted in a Metascore in the low 30s. As a kid, I was quite a fan of the 1982 film starring Albert Finney and Carol Burnett. I honestly don’t believe any of that carried over into my lukewarm appreciation of the 21<sup>st</sup>-century reboot, however. This latest big screen adaptation is <i>Annie </i>for the auto-tune generation, featuring new, modern-sounding songs (that I could have done without) in addition to the slightly hip-hop-ified classics. The biggest problem for me was that neither Annie nor Will Stacks (re: Daddy Warbucks) were as lovable as they could’ve been, and Annie’s time with Stacks didn’t come off as being as magical or significant to her as it should have. All of that being said, I think the film is bound to resonate with younger audiences—and maybe even a few adults.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>The Worst of the Worst</i></b></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tdsEY0h4Iz4/Vo_7q1f9I7I/AAAAAAAAFdc/3N8no8VmSXk/s1600/vacation.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-tdsEY0h4Iz4/Vo_7q1f9I7I/AAAAAAAAFdc/3N8no8VmSXk/s320/vacation.jpg" width="216" /></a>If you’re an avid movie watcher, seeing a bad film now and again comes with the territory. But there’s a difference between a bad movie and an absolutely terrible one. Every year, I see one or two movies that leave me sincerely baffled as to how something so awful can exist. 2015 was no exception. I saw five total films that I gave zero stars, which is a 400% increase over my 2014 viewings. Not good. Sadly, I also saw ten one-star films, which is one more than 2014. That’s a lot more crap than I’d prefer, but at least it gives me something to say at this point in my blog post. In the interest of time, I will limit my discussion to five films: the worst film of 2015, and the four worst films I saw in addition to that (regardless of year).</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">Based on the limited number of 2015 releases that I saw, my vote for the absolute worst film of 2015 is <b><i>Vacation</i></b>. I have to admit, I was kind of excited at the idea of a <i>Vacation </i>reboot, and I appreciated that the reboot wasn’t actually a remake but a legitimate sequel focusing on an adult Rusty Griswold (Ed Helms) taking his own family on a road trip to Walley World. Sadly, the film was awful. It was vulgar, offensive, and unfunny. It felt like a collection of brainstormed skits held together by the thinnest of plots. I don’t know if it made enough money to warrant a continuation of the series, but at this point, I’m sincerely hoping not.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">The absolute worst films I saw were not released in 2015. I gave <i>Vacation </i>one star, but the remaining films in my list were given zero stars. They are as follows:</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Brother’s Justice</i></b>. Dax Shepard tries his hand at making a mockumentary, and he does a terrible, terrible job. This movie was extremely, extremely boring. It follows Shepard as himself, shopping around the idea for an action movie (also titled <i>Brother’s Justice</i>)<i> </i>wherein he will be the star. And that’s the joke, folks. If you’re not laughing already, seeing the movie won’t help. Shephard apparently finds the idea that he could be an action star quite hilarious, since that is pretty much the only joke this movie makes. Again and again and again. Too much of the film is spent talking in earnest about making <i>Brother’s Justice</i> (the one you’re not actually watching), as though that idea alone is supposed to entertain us. There aren’t jokes being made, per se, which means Shepard honestly thought the proposed film within the film, and the very thought of him starring in it, was hilarious enough on its own—which it absolutely isn’t.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><b><i>Adam Sandler’s Eight Crazy Nights</i></b>. You knew Adam Sandler would have to show up again, didn’t you? Well, here he is. Sort of. <i>Eight Crazy Nights</i> is an animated holiday film from 2002, a film that exists presumably only because Sandler was quite the box office success at the time. And what do you do when you’re a box office success and can do whatever you want? Make an animated movie, I guess. All I know is the movie doesn’t exist because it had a funny script or a clever plot. Anyone capable of writing a screenplay could’ve written this. It is all so obvious and easy and unimaginative and juvenile. Rare, if ever, is the humor not scatological or offensive and at the expense of some group of people—fat people, epileptics, the transgendered, etc. Per usual, we’ve got chauvinism, with female characters being incredibly flat (except for their breasts). We’ve got scenes of deer defecating, explicitly and with a straight-on view of stools exiting the body. We’ve got scenes of people covered in feces, or farting, or with snot all over their faces, or peeing their pants, or literally eating jock straps. It’s a smorgasbord of weak, adolescent humor that I’m not sure even adolescents would find all that amusing.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SXfUMNUMF5s/Vo_8GLdL2pI/AAAAAAAAFdk/3nPitSOXuJ8/s1600/openwindows.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-SXfUMNUMF5s/Vo_8GLdL2pI/AAAAAAAAFdk/3nPitSOXuJ8/s320/openwindows.jpg" width="217" /></a></div><b><i>Maps to the Stars</i></b>. Strictly speaking, this one is actually the most overrated movie I saw in 2015. While I give it zero stars, it has a Metascore of 67. Now that’s some batshit craziness right there. I don’t even know what to say about this movie. An anonymous person summarizes the movie at IMDb as follows: “A tour into the heart of a Hollywood family chasing celebrity, one another and the relentless ghosts of their pasts.” Great, I have nothing more to add. This is one of those weird independent films that seems so pretentious and full of crap, and yet many critics eat it up and beg for more. I don’t know what to make of it. I honestly think some critics think something is brilliant if it just doesn’t make much sense. That’s what we’ve got here.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">And the absolute worst movie I’ve seen in the last twelve months is <b><i>Open Windows</i></b>. The thriller stars Elijah Wood as Nick, a devoted fan of movie starlet Jill Goddard (Sasha Grey). Nick wins a contest that is supposed to result in having dinner with Jill, but while getting ready in his hotel room, the dinner plans are canceled via phone call by Chord, a man identifying himself as Jill’s manager. As a consolation prize, the questionable Chord explains that he can hack into Nick’s laptop computer and livestream footage of Jill in her own hotel room. Nick is unsure at first, but eventually accepts the offer. And from there, things spiral out of control, with Nick becoming a pawn in a game of life-and-death. It sounds much more promising than it is. It’s incomprehensible to me that anyone would give this film more than one star. It’s truly one of the absolute shittiest films I’ve ever seen. It is so unbelievably outrageous and absurd, and the acting is atrocious. I felt like I was watching a video game from the early 1990s, one that was really high-tech at the time (with real actors and everything!) but is just embarrassing now. Everything about the movie seemed so incredibly staged and choreographed and, in the case of dialogue, pre-recorded. Rarely did anyone sound like they were really talking to another person rather than reading something off of a piece of paper, alone in some isolated sound booth somewhere. It was just unbelievable. And so excruciatingly convoluted. Like I said, it’s one of the worst films I have ever seen. Ever. I’m in disbelief. Utter and total disbelief.</div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
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<div class="MsoNormal">Here’s to the hope of good movie watching in 2016!</div>Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-47265399673023186472016-01-01T23:06:00.000-07:002019-05-11T21:58:50.709-06:00Happy, But Sorta Crappy, New YearThe whole week leading up to 2016, Melanie, the boys, and I have had the house to ourselves. Melanie’s parents and brother Tom went to visit her brother Brent in Seattle. With Melanie and the boys out of school, it felt like a vacation to us. We could do whatever, whenever, and didn’t ever feel like we were stepping on anyone else’s toes. Melanie and I could watch our favorite vulgar and profane TV shows in the living room at 1 AM and it didn’t matter. That sort of thing. Unfortunately, much of the fun has been ruined by persistent illness. I mentioned the roller coaster of health we’ve all been riding in <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2015/12/christmas-2015.html">my previous post</a>, but since then, I’ve gone back downhill. Yet again. It’s unbelievable. I feel like crap. I don’t know if the Utah climate is to blame or not, but I feel like I’m giving serious reconsideration to living here. The winter sucks. It hasn’t been that snowy this year, which is great, but the cold, dry air wreaks plenty of havoc. My skin dries out and cracks. Even if it doesn’t snow, you have to get up 30 minutes early to go stand in the cold and scrape the frost off of your windshield. Melanie has developed asthma since returning to this elevation. Creegan gets nosebleeds all the time, which used to be a very common problem for me living in Utah. And now this never-ending carousel of sickness. I don’t think we spent so much time sick in Florida. Maybe I’m glorifying the past, because I know I wrote blog posts in Florida about being sick all the time. But I don’t know if it was such long stretches. I’m hacking my lungs out. I feel like my insides are being torn apart, and like I have a blister on the back of my throat. Even when I did get sick in Florida, I don’t think it was this vicious. (The voice inside my head says, “Um, did you forget <a href="http://benjaminsbrain.blogspot.com/2011/03/emergency-surgeries-family-tradition.html">all the trips to the hospital</a>?” Okay, okay. Fair point.)<br />
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December 2015 saw me canceling many plans due to illness. It happened again on New Year’s Eve. My family had been invited to a friend’s house, and we were looking forward to it. My health kept swinging around, so I wasn’t sure what to expect. I thought I was on the mend, but Creegan and I were both feeling pretty crappy once New Year’s Eve arrived. Canceling plans is one of my least favorite things, so I always hold out until the last minute in case something can work out after all. As a result, I canceled on my friends rather last minute. I wasn’t the only person invited to their house, so it’s not like I completely ruined their evening. And I don’t pretend I’m so special that my not being around <i>would </i>ruin their evening. But you get the point. I think it was the right decision. I seemed to feel worse and worse as the night went on, and I tossed and turned all night, grunting and wheezing in that pre-cough dance that your throat often does when you have a really bad cold. I feel like poo balls today. I’m getting really tired of it.<br />
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Anyway, I’ll stop complaining and focus on the fun we had last night. Because we did manage to have some fun as a family. We ended up ordering Chinese takeout and picking up a movie (a family-friendly drama called <i><a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt3369806/">Max</a></i>, about a military dog) from Redbox. We also had some snacks on hand. After eating Chinese food and watching the movie, we played <a href="https://www.ilovetenzi.com/">TENZI</a>, a game that Melanie’s parents had given me for Christmas. In the game, up to four people are given 10 dice. Everybody starts at the same time, rolling their dice, putting to the side any dice that they wish, and then rerolling whatever’s left. The winner is whichever player first gets all 10 of his/her dice to be the same number. There are also several variations you can play, such as one where you not only have to get all 10 dice to the same number, but you then have to stack them up in a tower in order to win. It’s more fun, and less grueling, than I thought it would be. I think Eddie and Peter liked it. Creegan played a couple of rounds but then lost interest.<br />
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After game time, Eddie wanted to watch another movie. Even thought I doubt we’ve ever watched more than three movies on a New Year’s Eve during Eddie’s lifetime, the boy had it in his head that we were supposed to watch four or five. He found something on Netflix and started it, before anyone else really gave any input. I was fine with that. I hardly watched any of this second movie, the title of which I don’t even know. I did a little bit of reading. Creegan came up to me around this time and said he was going to go to sleep in Melanie’s and my bed. And he did just that. Peter and Eddie, however, remained alert and attentive all the way until midnight. As did Melanie—I think. She might have dozed off a little bit during the second movie, I’m not sure. Regardless, all of us except for Creegan were conscious as midnight approached. We turned over to ABC and watched the pre-recorded excitement of all those thousands of people crammed into New York’s Times Square as they welcomed 2016. When the ball dropped, or at least when it was broadcast to us here in the Mountain Time Zone, Eddie was the first to grab a pot and a wooden spoon and head bravely into the cold, making all the clatter he could. I had no interest in going outside. Melanie and Peter did. I was the party pooper, but I stand behind my decision.<br />
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And that’s pretty much that. We got Eddie and Peter to bed soon after, then Melanie and I went and watched a show on the living room couch. I fell asleep before the episode was over, benefiting no doubt from being in an upright position. Once the show ended and I officially went to bed, I was wheezing and hacking away. Thankfully, I eventually was getting more sleep than not, and I stayed in bed until nearly 11:30 AM.<br />
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I haven’t wanted to do much today. I’ve watched some TV, I’ve eaten. I’m proud to say I did a fair amount of cleaning in preparation for the return of Melanie’s parents. Melanie, the boys, and I played another game tonight—<a href="http://www.gamewright.com/gamewright/index.php?section=games&page=game&show=260">Gubs</a>, which Peter received in his stocking. I honestly don’t think there’s anything else to say about the day. It’s been a non-eventful 2016 thus far, which is probably what I would’ve hoped for on New Year’s Day, but in this case I wish it had been on better terms. I’ve coughed up more snot and boogers than I care to admit, but not nearly as much as I wish. I bet you’re glad you didn’t stop reading before you learned that.<br />
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And now, some photos from our New Year’s Eve. Enjoy.<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">My dinner plate. Yum.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Creegan's eyes look slightly demonic here, all because he's sick. His eyes were quite pink and cloudy.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Looks like somebody got TENZI!</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">This one should probably be filed under "photos that should never see the light of day," but I'll bravely share it with you. Peter thought my pajama joke was pretty funny and wanted to copy me. You know what they say, imitation is the highest form of flattery.</span></div>
<br />Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8266975.post-17008653192366804562015-12-30T23:51:00.000-07:002019-05-11T21:56:39.207-06:00Christmas 2015It will be much easier to recap the holiday season via photos than trying to explain everything in detail. It’s been a good few weeks, except for the fact that illness has been a persistent presence in our home. Melanie got strep, I got strep, I got bitten by a bug of some sort that made my head swell up quite a bit behind my ear and gave me very itchy extremities, and now we’re all back to having terrible colds. So, health wise, December has been a crappy month. But we’re trying to have some fun anyway. Below are some of the things we’ve been up to.<br />
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<b>December 8, 2015 – Rudolph Pancakes</b><br />
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<b>December 9, 2015 – Ugly Sweater Sugar Cookie Decorating</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6enMLT_3LJ4/VoRiAwfAVvI/AAAAAAAAFRg/XyMMMShf0pE/s1600/DSC07814b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6enMLT_3LJ4/VoRiAwfAVvI/AAAAAAAAFRg/XyMMMShf0pE/s640/DSC07814b.jpg" width="498" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2ZBFzcjyLlk/VoRiEYUaztI/AAAAAAAAFRs/v_wFvauWomU/s1600/DSC07815b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="556" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-2ZBFzcjyLlk/VoRiEYUaztI/AAAAAAAAFRs/v_wFvauWomU/s640/DSC07815b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a0shC_jYKUU/VoRiKGSC3zI/AAAAAAAAFR0/hGMOEjh1xTI/s1600/DSC07816b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-a0shC_jYKUU/VoRiKGSC3zI/AAAAAAAAFR0/hGMOEjh1xTI/s640/DSC07816b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
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<b>December 19, 2015 – Christmas Program at Church</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-SqpyDOE7h5A/VoRkQU7CobI/AAAAAAAAFSM/UGlDeuLg5N8/s1600/DSC07844b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-SqpyDOE7h5A/VoRkQU7CobI/AAAAAAAAFSM/UGlDeuLg5N8/s640/DSC07844b.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Creegan as a wise man.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kN1LVFtMPMM/VoRkQHFKKVI/AAAAAAAAFSI/Rdmq8M2-fu8/s1600/DSC07849b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-kN1LVFtMPMM/VoRkQHFKKVI/AAAAAAAAFSI/Rdmq8M2-fu8/s640/DSC07849b.jpg" width="530" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Peter as Caesar Augustus. Needless to say, the costumes available at church were not of ancient Hebrew fashion.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iUEVC9aFXQI/VoRkNMCtu8I/AAAAAAAAFSA/u03oeHPIEqI/s1600/DSC07854b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-iUEVC9aFXQI/VoRkNMCtu8I/AAAAAAAAFSA/u03oeHPIEqI/s640/DSC07854b.jpg" width="450" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Eddie as the angel.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Y2WsB-krmWo/VoRk075YBpI/AAAAAAAAFSg/y6M1TsE_Sb4/s1600/DSC07859c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="506" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Y2WsB-krmWo/VoRk075YBpI/AAAAAAAAFSg/y6M1TsE_Sb4/s640/DSC07859c.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ogc3YoUwJF8/VoRk4r8AvRI/AAAAAAAAFSo/x9B8WbD8UmQ/s1600/DSC07863b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="492" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-Ogc3YoUwJF8/VoRk4r8AvRI/AAAAAAAAFSo/x9B8WbD8UmQ/s640/DSC07863b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Acting is hard work.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OS1HPd0vjKU/VoRk-15LtiI/AAAAAAAAFSw/PAONLI4XCRU/s1600/DSC07870b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="520" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-OS1HPd0vjKU/VoRk-15LtiI/AAAAAAAAFSw/PAONLI4XCRU/s640/DSC07870b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Eddie as an angel, announcing to Mary that she is going to have a baby. He really captured the "wowzers!" factor.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-egk3L_0b5Dk/VoRlyFx1MCI/AAAAAAAAFS4/T9KaDtn8DeI/s1600/DSC07871b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="488" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-egk3L_0b5Dk/VoRlyFx1MCI/AAAAAAAAFS4/T9KaDtn8DeI/s640/DSC07871b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
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<b>December 20, 2015 – Snowmen Pizza</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ipcmsIxKoak/VoRn91m-Z0I/AAAAAAAAFTM/vl_MN5OnW1s/s1600/DSC07894b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-ipcmsIxKoak/VoRn91m-Z0I/AAAAAAAAFTM/vl_MN5OnW1s/s640/DSC07894b.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-AEiC5QzdHyo/VoRn6yzuE1I/AAAAAAAAFTE/nTYhIGRJ5Rw/s1600/DSC07895b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-AEiC5QzdHyo/VoRn6yzuE1I/AAAAAAAAFTE/nTYhIGRJ5Rw/s640/DSC07895b.jpg" width="574" /></a></div><br />
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<b>December 24, 2015 – Christmas Eve</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nVKqpQUw9oE/VoRo_FeG4TI/AAAAAAAAFTU/hUBFvfGr2sc/s1600/DSC07897b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="618" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-nVKqpQUw9oE/VoRo_FeG4TI/AAAAAAAAFTU/hUBFvfGr2sc/s640/DSC07897b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">The Christmas Eve tradition of opening one present from Mom and Dad continued this year. This year's gift: body pillows.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gpre0_PDdrc/VoRpPf6jumI/AAAAAAAAFTo/cN-dQcjNKD8/s1600/DSC07900b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="486" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-Gpre0_PDdrc/VoRpPf6jumI/AAAAAAAAFTo/cN-dQcjNKD8/s640/DSC07900b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-249KdMpRdqU/VoRpAO7ObYI/AAAAAAAAFTg/fuUCgpb_Ja4/s1600/DSC07903b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="522" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-249KdMpRdqU/VoRpAO7ObYI/AAAAAAAAFTg/fuUCgpb_Ja4/s640/DSC07903b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QL-Ofo7uv7k/VoRpeXvUpkI/AAAAAAAAFTw/af0MRaNnlVY/s1600/DSC07904b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-QL-Ofo7uv7k/VoRpeXvUpkI/AAAAAAAAFTw/af0MRaNnlVY/s640/DSC07904b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bFNxvx2Q0bw/VoRpfUEE5AI/AAAAAAAAFT4/uLnXsxvaA6g/s1600/DSC07905b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="474" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-bFNxvx2Q0bw/VoRpfUEE5AI/AAAAAAAAFT4/uLnXsxvaA6g/s640/DSC07905b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Creegan wasn't entirely sure how to use a body pillow.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-p4zjNVoQt3w/VoRqbfR_v1I/AAAAAAAAFUE/OjmCz4rRnCE/s1600/DSC07915b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="448" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-p4zjNVoQt3w/VoRqbfR_v1I/AAAAAAAAFUE/OjmCz4rRnCE/s640/DSC07915b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">We also continued our Christmas Eve tradition of driving around looking at Christmas lights just before bed. Eddie and Creegan could scarcely tolerate the flash of the camera. And don't worry, the kids had hot chocolate, not coffee. Melanie and I had the coffee: our first caramel macchiatos. I added some half and half to mine, as well as a couple of pumps of Irish Creme. It was muy bueno.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--gsY59TgO7E/VoRqbX-Op3I/AAAAAAAAFUI/taQx6vWQunI/s1600/DSC07917b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="560" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/--gsY59TgO7E/VoRqbX-Op3I/AAAAAAAAFUI/taQx6vWQunI/s640/DSC07917b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vIdWJgnlkB0/VoRqdrq-UXI/AAAAAAAAFUU/XrMGSs2rn60/s1600/DSC07918b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-vIdWJgnlkB0/VoRqdrq-UXI/AAAAAAAAFUU/XrMGSs2rn60/s640/DSC07918b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
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<b>December 25, 2015 – Christmas Day</b><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fGjDKrrIxdo/VoRs5oOx1LI/AAAAAAAAFUo/4y4L-rE4X9E/s1600/DSC07925b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-fGjDKrrIxdo/VoRs5oOx1LI/AAAAAAAAFUo/4y4L-rE4X9E/s640/DSC07925b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Where we currently live, we had one Christmas tree upstairs and another one downstairs. Like last year, Eddie left a note for Santa to leave all of his gifts downstairs. The upstairs tree was used primarily for gifts from family members, although I think Santa left some gifts that were NOT for Eddie, Peter, and Creegan upstairs. This is the upstairs tree, and so only about half of the Christmas booty.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ftmD4dP1hOA/VoRs4c3i9xI/AAAAAAAAFUg/zEoAJeyvjI8/s1600/DSC07932b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-ftmD4dP1hOA/VoRs4c3i9xI/AAAAAAAAFUg/zEoAJeyvjI8/s640/DSC07932b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Checking to see that Santa ate his cookies. This year, we also left out baby carrots for the reindeer and some cookies for Bernadette. Melanie was determined to teach our kids that Mrs. Claus has a first name and does more than sit at home on Christmas Eve. She comes along to help.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WMu21IVcvkc/VoRs6I29-KI/AAAAAAAAFUs/3Z5X9wEb5g4/s1600/DSC07935b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="494" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-WMu21IVcvkc/VoRs6I29-KI/AAAAAAAAFUs/3Z5X9wEb5g4/s640/DSC07935b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Let the unwrapping begin.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7bLAvgX1-VY/VoSJsdfR9yI/AAAAAAAAFVE/V547O7nm1Xg/s1600/DSC07941b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7bLAvgX1-VY/VoSJsdfR9yI/AAAAAAAAFVE/V547O7nm1Xg/s640/DSC07941b.jpg" width="424" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PS3pukXBQKA/VoSJtPhi3jI/AAAAAAAAFVM/56YfyNuxZoQ/s1600/DSC07950b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-PS3pukXBQKA/VoSJtPhi3jI/AAAAAAAAFVM/56YfyNuxZoQ/s640/DSC07950b.jpg" width="488" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FlMD2jZG4k8/VoSJr-oEnEI/AAAAAAAAFVA/5C5XOqgMtuQ/s1600/DSC07953b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-FlMD2jZG4k8/VoSJr-oEnEI/AAAAAAAAFVA/5C5XOqgMtuQ/s640/DSC07953b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r6mVCu25e2g/VoSKDBY0zRI/AAAAAAAAFVY/b3JRF396cJw/s1600/DSC07956b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="506" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-r6mVCu25e2g/VoSKDBY0zRI/AAAAAAAAFVY/b3JRF396cJw/s640/DSC07956b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Nerf guns were a very popular item. All three boys asked for some, and all three received more than one as a gift.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DEK45Yyi9Io/VoSKPdiCnRI/AAAAAAAAFVg/8aF5FTua5Fc/s1600/DSC07964b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-DEK45Yyi9Io/VoSKPdiCnRI/AAAAAAAAFVg/8aF5FTua5Fc/s640/DSC07964b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RRHDhoCDQGQ/VoSKQSGCYSI/AAAAAAAAFVk/VwANdd60Ksw/s1600/DSC07972b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-RRHDhoCDQGQ/VoSKQSGCYSI/AAAAAAAAFVk/VwANdd60Ksw/s640/DSC07972b.jpg" width="456" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">These cups are called Snackeez Duos. Apparently, the boys have wanted one very much ever since seeing them in use early in the school year. There is a compartment for snacks at the top, and the beverage goes in the area beneath. A straw then extends through the snack section and into the drink. You can then pop open the top and snack on whatever.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-_Ge7BP0pFZw/VoSLFmmL2gI/AAAAAAAAFV0/N0KfodNi40g/s1600/DSC07977b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-_Ge7BP0pFZw/VoSLFmmL2gI/AAAAAAAAFV0/N0KfodNi40g/s640/DSC07977b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0Li3rvPv3Dg/VoSLO1A8cMI/AAAAAAAAFV8/gh8pMTLG-m8/s1600/DSC07981b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="526" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-0Li3rvPv3Dg/VoSLO1A8cMI/AAAAAAAAFV8/gh8pMTLG-m8/s640/DSC07981b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">As Christmas approached, Creegan suddenly took a strong interest in the one and only Perplexus game that we own. He started asking if there were other Perplexus games and what were they called, etc. It was clear that getting a new Perplexus for Creegan was a must. Here, he examines his newly opened Perplexus Twist.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-pYV1Vrt-_y0/VoSLQ-94BPI/AAAAAAAAFWE/KLtZK8NK5-E/s1600/DSC07983b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-pYV1Vrt-_y0/VoSLQ-94BPI/AAAAAAAAFWE/KLtZK8NK5-E/s640/DSC07983b.jpg" width="438" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-8SBT8llJXW8/VoSLVa6VRHI/AAAAAAAAFWM/l2eHfQdEzwo/s1600/DSC07991b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-8SBT8llJXW8/VoSLVa6VRHI/AAAAAAAAFWM/l2eHfQdEzwo/s640/DSC07991b.jpg" width="494" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4YsxaL1CFLo/VoS6a8-kVPI/AAAAAAAAFWs/MbpyUv_GmAM/s1600/DSC07997b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-4YsxaL1CFLo/VoS6a8-kVPI/AAAAAAAAFWs/MbpyUv_GmAM/s640/DSC07997b.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-cKknOZ-At3s/VoS6ZZ8kj7I/AAAAAAAAFWc/-mCXHrbdDQw/s1600/DSC08001b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-cKknOZ-At3s/VoS6ZZ8kj7I/AAAAAAAAFWc/-mCXHrbdDQw/s640/DSC08001b.jpg" width="386" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Peter and Creegan each received a "Chubby Puppy" from Melanie's parents. They found them quite adorable.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VOc0BXynQWI/VoS6ZRKqLlI/AAAAAAAAFWg/1uETT1oKx7s/s1600/DSC08003b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="502" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-VOc0BXynQWI/VoS6ZRKqLlI/AAAAAAAAFWg/1uETT1oKx7s/s640/DSC08003b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-A8fTKXsghHM/VoS6kmIa33I/AAAAAAAAFW8/f5u0NRqlDC8/s1600/DSC08006b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-A8fTKXsghHM/VoS6kmIa33I/AAAAAAAAFW8/f5u0NRqlDC8/s640/DSC08006b.jpg" width="310" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7WeEMMa1ZJM/VoS6hKtLYXI/AAAAAAAAFW0/IDX1WYXYADg/s1600/DSC08012b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-7WeEMMa1ZJM/VoS6hKtLYXI/AAAAAAAAFW0/IDX1WYXYADg/s640/DSC08012b.jpg" width="390" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vCBzKLHist8/VoS6nM3XiAI/AAAAAAAAFXE/QDkmUN486lQ/s1600/DSC08014b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="608" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-vCBzKLHist8/VoS6nM3XiAI/AAAAAAAAFXE/QDkmUN486lQ/s640/DSC08014b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qL9OF3P70II/VoS6t_1j7MI/AAAAAAAAFXU/GUmMw8H-bi8/s1600/DSC08017b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-qL9OF3P70II/VoS6t_1j7MI/AAAAAAAAFXU/GUmMw8H-bi8/s640/DSC08017b.jpg" width="516" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">The last few years, the boys have each received a card game with their stocking. This year, Eddie received Guillotine.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-YCypdunXn9g/VoS6rihhQ_I/AAAAAAAAFXM/mievAhkcUKA/s1600/DSC08025b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-YCypdunXn9g/VoS6rihhQ_I/AAAAAAAAFXM/mievAhkcUKA/s640/DSC08025b.jpg" width="188" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Eddie brought up last minute that he hoped to receive Diet Coke in his stocking. It was so last minute that I'm sure Santa must have already planned that. What a coincidence. Usually, our kids aren't permitted caffeinated beverages.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-LCtgxjeu1Ro/VoTGGkGLIJI/AAAAAAAAFXs/5TiY4nCslxc/s1600/DSC08040b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-LCtgxjeu1Ro/VoTGGkGLIJI/AAAAAAAAFXs/5TiY4nCslxc/s640/DSC08040b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6_8f1Br7XC4/VoTGFRmwW8I/AAAAAAAAFXk/Bvvs-rrAui4/s1600/DSC08050b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="506" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6_8f1Br7XC4/VoTGFRmwW8I/AAAAAAAAFXk/Bvvs-rrAui4/s640/DSC08050b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">One of several packages of nuts I received for Christmas. In addition to the toasted coconut cashews you see here, I also received pumpkin spice almonds, regular cashews, macadamia nuts, and others.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-KpFCmoNxQ90/VoTGHFaUkkI/AAAAAAAAFXw/6QszABMnvtU/s1600/DSC08054b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="566" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-KpFCmoNxQ90/VoTGHFaUkkI/AAAAAAAAFXw/6QszABMnvtU/s640/DSC08054b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Christmas Part II: The Downstairs Tree</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bHwoh1LKIFM/VoTGPOpUK6I/AAAAAAAAFX8/V1zl0S4V4F0/s1600/DSC08057b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-bHwoh1LKIFM/VoTGPOpUK6I/AAAAAAAAFX8/V1zl0S4V4F0/s640/DSC08057b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Creegan finds one of several unwrapped movies mixed in with the gifts. Santa often leaves a few unwrapped items that are meant for the whole family.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-1exxNk3tYDI/VoTJhzz2sXI/AAAAAAAAFYI/DXw-UV98TDc/s1600/DSC08058b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-1exxNk3tYDI/VoTJhzz2sXI/AAAAAAAAFYI/DXw-UV98TDc/s640/DSC08058b.jpg" width="480" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Hvd9kQoe70A/VoTJkcsL6gI/AAAAAAAAFYQ/tXva_igfuTs/s1600/DSC08064b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="536" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-Hvd9kQoe70A/VoTJkcsL6gI/AAAAAAAAFYQ/tXva_igfuTs/s640/DSC08064b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-AwrRU9s3gQM/VoTJlZadfWI/AAAAAAAAFYY/K2lfCULULHo/s1600/DSC08071b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="480" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-AwrRU9s3gQM/VoTJlZadfWI/AAAAAAAAFYY/K2lfCULULHo/s640/DSC08071b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gZ3VQ7l53KU/VoTJne7pwtI/AAAAAAAAFYg/8ikZCMMj8KQ/s1600/DSC08075b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-gZ3VQ7l53KU/VoTJne7pwtI/AAAAAAAAFYg/8ikZCMMj8KQ/s640/DSC08075b.jpg" width="364" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">This CD received near constant play in our family car while we had it checked out from the library. All three boys absolutely love it. Since Santa brought us our own copy, it has again gone into permanent play on our car stereo.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MNjr23Jv2XE/VoTJ0yUzI4I/AAAAAAAAFYo/VrkWegdtHXk/s1600/DSC08078b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="536" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MNjr23Jv2XE/VoTJ0yUzI4I/AAAAAAAAFYo/VrkWegdtHXk/s640/DSC08078b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-UB5UXeYt5iM/VoTJ6EPocJI/AAAAAAAAFYw/T0JX_AWgdCQ/s1600/DSC08079b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="508" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-UB5UXeYt5iM/VoTJ6EPocJI/AAAAAAAAFYw/T0JX_AWgdCQ/s640/DSC08079b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_NFaU-mrSm0/VoTJ66otnKI/AAAAAAAAFY4/4xhMMqkodIs/s1600/DSC08081b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-_NFaU-mrSm0/VoTJ66otnKI/AAAAAAAAFY4/4xhMMqkodIs/s640/DSC08081b.jpg" width="492" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9hbFBLRfoMY/VoTMyftqFlI/AAAAAAAAFZE/qscyyuMsHfQ/s1600/DSC08084b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-9hbFBLRfoMY/VoTMyftqFlI/AAAAAAAAFZE/qscyyuMsHfQ/s640/DSC08084b.jpg" width="470" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6DISr4hHUwE/VoTM0S0XyYI/AAAAAAAAFZU/Pfo2x65FEQI/s1600/DSC08091b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="626" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-6DISr4hHUwE/VoTM0S0XyYI/AAAAAAAAFZU/Pfo2x65FEQI/s640/DSC08091b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NiZBty1ruAQ/VoTMzUmZJ7I/AAAAAAAAFZM/pVlFQy1kbzk/s1600/DSC08095b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-NiZBty1ruAQ/VoTMzUmZJ7I/AAAAAAAAFZM/pVlFQy1kbzk/s640/DSC08095b.jpg" width="406" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">When Peter sent his letter to Santa, he asked for only five things. One of those things was a purse. Santa delivered this peppermint purse, which Peter dons proudly.</span></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-oQe01KPrX5I/VoTM7lTrDNI/AAAAAAAAFZc/5-RalX6aaF4/s1600/DSC08097b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="562" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-oQe01KPrX5I/VoTM7lTrDNI/AAAAAAAAFZc/5-RalX6aaF4/s640/DSC08097b.jpg" width="640" /></a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">A ghost-shooting game courtesy of Uncle Tom.</span></div><br />
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I’ll conclude with some photos of Peter enjoying his new keyboard. It took a couple of days for him to open it and actually start using it, but since then, he’s been quite enthusiastic about it. He loves playing the demos and dancing along, as you’ll see below, but he also likes experimenting with his own playing. It’s been very fun for a music fanatic such as myself to behold.<br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PLS-RRb7-VY/VoTPjmdwlRI/AAAAAAAAFZ0/3OQtqS2UfBQ/s1600/DSC08104b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-PLS-RRb7-VY/VoTPjmdwlRI/AAAAAAAAFZ0/3OQtqS2UfBQ/s640/DSC08104b.jpg" width="446" /></a></div><br />
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<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-C9Jm6IZMDj0/VoTPiq7eFgI/AAAAAAAAFZs/hY2AqH3yucA/s1600/DSC08109b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-C9Jm6IZMDj0/VoTPiq7eFgI/AAAAAAAAFZs/hY2AqH3yucA/s640/DSC08109b.jpg" width="400" /></a></div><br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OiCm90QyRYE/VoTPwnKNZiI/AAAAAAAAFaE/RnKoAeKdBrk/s1600/DSC08112b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="640" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-OiCm90QyRYE/VoTPwnKNZiI/AAAAAAAAFaE/RnKoAeKdBrk/s640/DSC08112b.jpg" width="416" /></a></div><br />
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See you next year!<br />
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Benjaminhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09916394486715539975noreply@blogger.com0